Episode 173 - Scorched 46 and The Curse of Shirlee Johnson 2!

[00:00:00] Speaker A: The ship spans over three miles in length, housing technology that our scientists would be unable to fathom. For as developed as we like to believe the human species is, other civilizations have had hundreds of thousands longer to build up their prowess. Good evening, and welcome to the Malibols. This is regarding Swan, the world's best spawn podcast. I am your co host, John Fisher. [00:00:58] Speaker B: And I'm your co host, David Williams. And, Johnny, it is trans day of visibility. So right off the top, we have to say, hey, trans people, we see you. We love you. Stay, please. We like you here. [00:01:15] Speaker A: I agree. [00:01:16] Speaker B: Yeah, it's pretty awesome. Also, this is the first episode that's coming out in April, so you know what that means. [00:01:22] Speaker A: Johnny gonna play a trick on me? [00:01:24] Speaker B: No. It's natural. It's National Poetry Month, which means I get to read another poem. I'm gonna read. I'm gonna read an untitled poem from Tom Clark. Smack. Which, if you remember, I read from last year as well. Here we go. You're gonna hate me for this. [00:01:48] Speaker A: Okay. [00:01:50] Speaker B: The nipple is made of erectile tissue, like the cock, and the object is to make it fully erect. [00:01:56] Speaker A: I don't hate you for that because it's dirty. [00:02:00] Speaker B: I'm a dirty boy. But that's. That's art. Capital A art, everybody. Also, just try me in. Yeah, she doesn't like poetry. [00:02:12] Speaker A: We got there. [00:02:13] Speaker B: We got there. [00:02:15] Speaker A: Who do you have there in your lap? [00:02:16] Speaker B: This is. This is Midge. Or Smidgen or Smudge. [00:02:21] Speaker A: Or. [00:02:22] Speaker B: You goddamn little turd, as she's more commonly known. And she. [00:02:27] Speaker A: She likes you. [00:02:28] Speaker B: Yeah, she likes me. She does not like Wanda very much. She suffers Wanda. And Wanda is not having it, okay? She says absolutely not. I don't give a shit. [00:02:39] Speaker A: So she's our Kevin Eubanks tonight. Or Moltar. More like Moltar. [00:02:45] Speaker B: More like Moltar. I don't know. [00:02:47] Speaker A: I'm Zorak. And you're a space ghost, right? You're definitely space ghost. [00:02:52] Speaker B: Yeah, probably. I was about to say I'm not that cool, but I guess space ghost [00:02:59] Speaker A: made fun of him all the time. Zorak and Molder. [00:03:01] Speaker B: Zorak was definitely the cool one. [00:03:03] Speaker A: You had a wrong reading of that show. If you had. Space ghost was cool. He was a classic buffoon. [00:03:08] Speaker B: Johnny. Johnny. I thought he was cool. He's cool compared to. [00:03:12] Speaker A: He's cool, but he's funny. He's just a buffoon. [00:03:16] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm definitely the buffoon. [00:03:18] Speaker A: You're probably a brat. You love Brack, I bet. [00:03:23] Speaker B: Yeah, I like Brack almost. [00:03:25] Speaker A: I Like Zorag. [00:03:26] Speaker B: My. My introduction to the whole. The whole thing was through the Brak show. Specifically through songs sung on the Brak show. Because which songs? I don't remember. It was so long ago. [00:03:40] Speaker A: Ohio. Ohio. Round on the end, high in the middle. [00:03:47] Speaker B: I don't remember. It was so long ago. It was. It was shit. We used to listen to in the. The vans on mission trips. [00:03:54] Speaker A: How old were you? [00:03:55] Speaker B: I was. I was like 11 and 12. [00:03:57] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah. So probably the Space Ghost Musical Barbecue. [00:04:01] Speaker B: Probably, yeah. [00:04:02] Speaker A: That's why SpaceX Musical Barbecue, which was the album from Cartoon Planet, which is technically the spin off show of Space Ghost Coast. Coast. Yeah, but Cartoon Planet was the one that had bracken it. [00:04:14] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:04:14] Speaker A: How deep you want me to go into this, David? [00:04:17] Speaker B: How deep? How deep? Well, how much time you get for deep? [00:04:21] Speaker A: I'm fine. I mean, I wouldn't mind. [00:04:24] Speaker B: Dive away, sir. Dive away. [00:04:26] Speaker A: No, I wouldn't mind getting some Resident Evil tonight before I. Oh, okay. Fall asleep. So maybe I want to keep it moving. [00:04:32] Speaker B: All right, maybe. [00:04:34] Speaker A: Well, I mean, I don't know. I. I was obsessed with space ghost for many years. It was in the early days of the Internet and there are a lot of space ghost fan sites. So I know a lot about like space ghost fandom. Like, yeah, like. But I had like, there's something romantic about having to stay up till midnight to see the show Cartoon Planet. It was on at like 11:30. It's on after Speed Racer, which got me into Speed Racer. [00:04:59] Speaker B: Oh, nice. [00:05:00] Speaker A: Because it show speed racer, like 11, I think. I can't remember. Maybe it was 10:30. [00:05:03] Speaker B: I used to. I used to love having to stay up to watch the stuff. Like that was. That was one of the. The beautiful things about Conan is. Oh, Conan was great. My parents were asleep by the time Conan came on, so it felt like it was just for me. [00:05:14] Speaker A: Also, Conan did like the 2000s. Conan was just amazing. [00:05:18] Speaker B: Yeah, it was amazing. It was so good. [00:05:20] Speaker A: He always had like a crazy sketch and like just off the wall stuff and like it was always really funny. [00:05:26] Speaker B: Like, I like Max Weinberg. Max Weinberg's real fun. Yeah, the. The sad. The sad occurrence of. Oh, fuck, what's his name? Not Kurt Vonnegut. Not Chuck Russell. [00:05:42] Speaker A: What? [00:05:43] Speaker B: Fucking Walker, Texas Ranger. What's that guy's name? [00:05:45] Speaker A: Oh, the Walker Texas Rangers lover. [00:05:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:48] Speaker A: Chuck Norris. [00:05:48] Speaker B: Chuck Norris. Jesus Christ. Chuck Norris. Johnny. Something's wrong. But. But like the reason I liked all of the Chuck Norris jokes was from when the NBC Universal merger the button to just randomly play a Walker Texas Ranger clip. [00:06:06] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:06:07] Speaker B: And he came up with all sorts of like Rube Goldbergian. [00:06:11] Speaker A: I remember one time Walker just walk up to a horse and punch it. [00:06:18] Speaker B: I think one of the first ones he. He used was the little kids with. I have aids. [00:06:22] Speaker A: Oh, it was Haley Joel Osment. [00:06:24] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, shit. [00:06:25] Speaker A: He goes. He goes. They're like talking to the kid. And he just stops for a minute. He goes, walker told me I have AIDS. [00:06:33] Speaker B: Oh, so subtle. So subtle. Those 90s television shows. [00:06:37] Speaker A: Walker took him out to Canyon and laid out the truth. [00:06:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:41] Speaker A: All right. [00:06:42] Speaker B: You know, Chuck Norris, death comes for us all. You know, Johnny, I just read a scholarly article called the Onion. And they said that people with dead family members have a 100% certainty of also being dead someday. Can you believe that? I can't believe that. [00:07:05] Speaker A: I can't believe that passes as comedy. [00:07:11] Speaker B: It's amazing. It's amazing what the Onion can get up to these days, people. [00:07:15] Speaker A: You get physical copies of it delivered to you. [00:07:17] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. That's the only way you can get copies of it anymore because you have to buy it. It's no longer free, but you know, support. Support shit. It's real good. All of the. All of the. The free. The free monthly alt publications are now. You gotta buy them to get them. Tough out. It's tough out there. Oh, well, like here in Chicago. There was the Reader and New City. [00:07:44] Speaker A: And this Reader still exists. [00:07:46] Speaker B: The Reader. The Reader has gone to monthly. It is still free and. But New City. New City has gone to a subscription model. [00:07:54] Speaker A: Okay. [00:07:54] Speaker B: I always liked New City more. [00:07:56] Speaker A: Remember, you get the Reader and the Red eye or the Red Eye. [00:07:59] Speaker B: All the red eye junk. Dude, the Red Eye was. The Red eye was awesome for a rainy day because then you could just to do the old fashioned newspaper. It went down so smooth when you weren't fully awake in the morning though. Yeah, it's fun as hell. They got any. They got any alt weeklies in. In Tulsa now? [00:08:20] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:08:21] Speaker B: You don't know because it seems. It seems like a. It seems like they would have at least one. [00:08:25] Speaker A: You got a magazine that Tulsa People? I think it's monthly or quarterly. [00:08:29] Speaker B: Nice. Nice. [00:08:30] Speaker A: They have a pet. They have Tulsa Pets. [00:08:32] Speaker B: Tulsa Pets. Nice. [00:08:34] Speaker A: Yeah, they had it when Megan and [00:08:35] Speaker B: I went to BVD Nice. [00:08:38] Speaker A: Tulsa Pets Magazine. [00:08:39] Speaker B: I think it's quarterly and I should probably get a subscription to that up here. [00:08:44] Speaker A: Why not? [00:08:47] Speaker B: Just what I need. Just what I need more information about dogs. [00:08:50] Speaker A: It's very dog focused. I felt the. Like the cats got slighted. [00:08:54] Speaker B: Yeah. They. I think. I feel like. I feel like cats are having a. A dip. Like, because. Because, like, early Internet was cat videos, and dog has taken over a little bit. I feel like. I feel like there's. I feel like there needs to be more cat content. [00:09:10] Speaker A: Cats are onto it. Cats are like, where's my cut? I'm not doing this for free. [00:09:15] Speaker B: Oh, that's true. I do like. I do like a video that revolves around a fat cat doing something dumb and then falling. [00:09:24] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:25] Speaker B: Or cats. A fat cat trying to jump up onto something and missing just completely. [00:09:31] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:32] Speaker B: There was a. There was a kitten rescue not far from where Bran lived in Stillwater that we used to. That we used to volunteer at. And there was an old cat named Lotus that was blind. And so anytime the lady who. Who ran the rescue would move her furniture, Lotus would act like all the furniture was in the spot it was and would just, like, run into shit. And. [00:09:56] Speaker A: Oh, poor. [00:09:58] Speaker B: She was. She was a resilient cat. It was awesome. But it was just funny to see her to go just into the air, hoping to land on something and then being like, Lotus was awesome. She was also missing an eye. And she's where I learned that if you. If you get into the eye socket of a. Of a cat with no eye and you just scratch the back of it, they'll love you forever. [00:10:19] Speaker A: Oh, my God. That's just fucking disgusting. [00:10:21] Speaker B: But they can't get their paws in there. And, you know, it's. Shit gets itchy and, you know, you. You itching, you itch. A cat's eye socket, and they will love you for ever. What? What? I'm out here trying to get love of cats, Johnny. That's something you got to come by. Honestly. Dogs. Dogs will just love you instantly. Cats. Cats won't give a shit about you until they decide they need to give a shit about you. You gotta endear yourself to the cat. [00:10:47] Speaker A: Yeah, don't. [00:10:48] Speaker B: Don't tell me. Don't tell me that if you had. [00:10:51] Speaker A: You know, I'm sticking his eye socket. [00:10:54] Speaker B: Don't tell me that you wouldn't fall in love with somebody who scratched the inside of your eye socket. That would be great maybe, like, if [00:11:04] Speaker A: you took my eye. What are you doing? What are you planning? [00:11:07] Speaker B: I'm not planning anything. [00:11:08] Speaker A: Are you gonna eat my eye? You're trying to become part of the elite. Like, you gotta eat a person. [00:11:13] Speaker B: I've. I mean, we should probably try everything once, right? What? [00:11:18] Speaker A: Of course you would. [00:11:20] Speaker B: I used to. I used to work in a pulmonary. [00:11:23] Speaker A: Was David Williams Mentioned the Epstein files. [00:11:27] Speaker B: I used to work in the pulmonary department. And some of the researchers would get the. The lungs that were unfit for trans transplant to do research on. There was one day where one guy was like, hey, if anybody. Will anybody eat some of this with me? Because I'll eat it with you if you eat it. What did he. He did not get any takers because everybody was like, absolutely the not Joe. [00:11:54] Speaker A: A human lung. [00:11:55] Speaker B: A human lung. [00:11:56] Speaker A: He wanted to eat it. [00:11:57] Speaker B: He wanted to eat some and he wanted somebody to eat it with him. So that way if he was down. Well, no, he didn't eat it. He didn't eat it. I must, I must. On the record, he did not eat it. But he. He wanted to have a partner in crime. So that way, in case he got in trouble, multiple people would go down, but nobody. [00:12:15] Speaker A: That's insane. That goes on in our medical institutions. How am I supposed to talk about Spawn after all this revelations? [00:12:24] Speaker B: What? [00:12:24] Speaker A: You casually drop that this guy was like, does anyone want to become a cannibal with me in your office? And he wasn't immediately fired. [00:12:31] Speaker B: No, no, he was on a lot of shit. He was on a lot of people's shit list before that though, so. [00:12:37] Speaker A: Okay, good. [00:12:38] Speaker B: It was not unexpected behavior from this particular individual. [00:12:42] Speaker A: That's weird. [00:12:44] Speaker B: Yeah, it was really fucking weird. And everybody was like, absolutely the fucked up. Yeah, but also you're in a lab. You don't eat shit in the lab, Johnny. That's like rule number one. Don't put anything in your mouth. [00:12:54] Speaker A: That's disturbing. [00:12:56] Speaker B: It is disturbing. I deal with some disturbing stuff on a daily basis, Johnny. I just. I just think it's regular. I just think it's regular. You should come shadow me at work sometime, John. [00:13:09] Speaker A: No, never. [00:13:10] Speaker B: We'll see. We'll see how shook you can get. There used to be. There used to be an abnormal fetus collection that it has now been since removed elsewhere. And it's under like strict lock and key. But you used to just be able to like open a door and walk into a room and there it was. A whole bunch of abnormal fetuses and jars. It was. It was. It was terrible. They were all fucking disturbing. And how they were collected was. We don't want to. We don't want to go there. There were 150. They were 150 year old samples. So they weren't taken in the most ethical way. But there is nothing more life affirming than at looking at something and just the sight of them making your stomach go like you're about to throw up. It's amazing for you. It's. It lets you know you're alive, Johnny. [00:14:00] Speaker A: How You're a little gorefine, though. I know you watch like, Ron probably watched two guys, one hammer or whatever. [00:14:08] Speaker B: I don't. I don't think I've seen. I don't think I've seen that one. I've seen some up. [00:14:12] Speaker A: You guys, like, beat a guy to death. [00:14:13] Speaker B: Oh, I haven't seen that one. No, I have seen. I have seen Funky Town, though, and that's anyone. [00:14:18] Speaker A: I've never heard that before, and I'm gonna Google it. [00:14:21] Speaker B: Don't Google Funky Town. [00:14:22] Speaker A: I'm not gonna watch it. I'm gonna read a description of it. Oh, how am I supposed to talk about Spawn after all this? [00:14:28] Speaker B: Well, it's the. [00:14:29] Speaker A: It's the cannibalism. Like, what in the. I'm ready to call it an episode. If you can keep it going, then. [00:14:39] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, Johnny, the Spawn is what's supposed to relax you afterward. It's the Disney film after the horror movies, so that way you can fall asleep. [00:14:47] Speaker A: I'm gonna be sick. I think I'm gonna grow up. [00:14:50] Speaker B: Well, I mean, do it on Mike so we get good foley. If we're gonna go. If we're gonna go in. I'm being gross nasty. Just. Just dive in. Don't you know, Johnny, it's gross nasty season. [00:15:06] Speaker A: What? [00:15:07] Speaker B: It's gross. It's the season to be gross nasty. Just because we're being gross nasty, we got to give it a reason, Johnny, [00:15:13] Speaker A: I've never heard that. You're making it up. [00:15:15] Speaker B: I am making it up, but you know what I didn't make up, Johnny? [00:15:19] Speaker A: What? [00:15:20] Speaker B: The idea of what we're doing right here. Actually, that was. That was your idea. That was your idea, if I do remember correctly. [00:15:26] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Don't throw that in my face. [00:15:28] Speaker B: Well, what is it we're doing? What did I just throw in your face? [00:15:33] Speaker A: No. How disturbing it was when you told me. [00:15:37] Speaker B: I. I did not. I really did not expect you to be as disturbed as you are. [00:15:44] Speaker A: People are crazy anyway. What is it? Crazy is. We are. I'm sorry. [00:15:50] Speaker B: It just. [00:15:51] Speaker A: It's just disturbing. I've been a very. I don't know. The world's being real weird right now. I'm just in a very conspiratorial mindset. [00:15:58] Speaker B: All right. Well, no, it makes. It makes sense, Johnny. [00:16:01] Speaker A: They made up that word to make me seem crazy. So just, like, looking at alternative news and be like, oh, that actually did happen. [00:16:06] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:16:08] Speaker A: I don't want to get into it. We got aliens. [00:16:11] Speaker B: Aliens are demons. [00:16:13] Speaker A: Aliens are demons. According to J.D. vance. Did you see the Catholic thing? [00:16:18] Speaker B: No, I didn't. [00:16:19] Speaker A: They up like, it's. It's true that he had a meeting of exorcists, and he wants the Pope, like the oppression to get an exorcist in every diocese. He wants 2,000 more exorcists recruited in the next, like, three years. [00:16:32] Speaker B: Who the pope does or J.D. vance? [00:16:36] Speaker A: The pope. [00:16:37] Speaker B: Okay. Okay. [00:16:37] Speaker A: That's what the they. That was their takeaway from their meeting of exorcist. Because Satanism is on the rise. You probably saw a ghost music video and was like, oh, my God. [00:16:48] Speaker B: It was like blasphemy, heresy. [00:16:51] Speaker A: I don't know, man. Yeah, J.D. vance's aliens are demons. He's gonna get to the bottom of it. Whatever. [00:16:58] Speaker B: I don't. I don't think I want to see what the bottom of that is. [00:17:01] Speaker A: We are respawn regarding Spawn or each week we bring you two issues from Spawn's universe. Except when we don't. This week we're talking about eating people and conspiracies and maybe also Swan. It's no different. This week is no different. [00:17:21] Speaker B: Yeah. No, it's not. [00:17:22] Speaker A: We have two issues from Swan's universe. [00:17:24] Speaker B: Yes, we do. [00:17:25] Speaker A: And we've got two. Rip roaring. I really enjoy both these issues. [00:17:30] Speaker B: Yeah, they're pretty. [00:17:31] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. What was that? Pained. Yeah. [00:17:38] Speaker B: Scorched. 46, maybe. Could have been two issues. [00:17:42] Speaker A: That was awesome. [00:17:43] Speaker B: There's a lot. There's a lot in there. [00:17:45] Speaker A: Greatest ending of a Swan issue ever. [00:17:48] Speaker B: There's a lot in. The ending is pretty great, but it is. It is chock full of so, so much stuff. [00:17:55] Speaker A: Yeah. When I cracked it open, I was like, jeez, that's a lot of dialogue for sports. And I looked over the left and it said, written by Tom McFarland. [00:18:01] Speaker B: And I was like, oh, okay. [00:18:03] Speaker A: Good to know. [00:18:05] Speaker B: Good to know. [00:18:05] Speaker A: But I thought he did good. [00:18:07] Speaker B: Yeah, he did. Yeah. It was great. It didn't. I mean, outside of the wordiness, it did not feel like a Todd McFarland. A contemporary Tom. [00:18:17] Speaker A: We'll get to it, but we gotta start. Okay. Because that's. Because what we're doing is scores.46 and Curse of Surly Johnson number two. Sorry. He's completely derailed me. How many. [00:18:29] Speaker B: How long. [00:18:29] Speaker A: How long after you work with this? [00:18:34] Speaker B: I think I transferred out of that department like six or seven months later. And I think he was there for. [00:18:43] Speaker A: He, like, looking at you and you turn like a chicken leg, like on Moody Tunes. You're like, it sure is hot in here. He's like, you're, like, sweating, and he's imagining. You can't come back from that. [00:18:56] Speaker B: It just turned into a ham. Yeah, you can't come back to that. [00:18:59] Speaker A: You can't come back from that. If you were, like, trying to get me to eat human lungs with you, I'd be like, you're a psychopath. [00:19:05] Speaker B: I'm just glad he didn't follow me to my next lab, because the next lab after that was an HPV lab, and we grew fake. Like, we. We cultured skin that we derived the. The stem cells from foreskin remnants from circumcised babies. So I'm glad he wasn't trying to eat those samples. [00:19:24] Speaker A: Stop. Stop. Don't talk about your work anymore. What the fuck do you work? [00:19:31] Speaker B: Well, no, it's. [00:19:32] Speaker A: You know about aliens. You're probably working for them. [00:19:34] Speaker B: They're. They're fetus samples and force foreskins. I mean, people are going to circumcise their children. That's gonna happen. Unfortunately, it's gonna be medical waste, but there are lots of stem cells in there, so medical waste is regulated in many, many regards. So there were a lot of safeguards we had to go through with them. [00:19:56] Speaker A: It's old, isn't it? [00:19:59] Speaker B: There was. Not sold. Not sold in the sense that you're trying to get me to say that they're sold. There's like. It's. It's a. A way of. It's a way of tracking where the samples go. So that way it's not just like, oh, where did all these foreskins go? So there's like. There's. There's a. Jesus. [00:20:19] Speaker A: How. [00:20:19] Speaker B: It's a. It's a nominal fee, so that way there's a. A paper trail, and it's. It's like three bucks, and it, like, covers the cost of the tube that it's in. But they. They had to make sure that everything was registered, and that's how they. They. They keep what they call chain of custody of those particular samples. [00:20:35] Speaker A: Oh, Jesus Christ. Why would you say that? I'm, like, freaking out for, like, 20 minutes over the first one. [00:20:40] Speaker B: But then. But then we'd isolate the. We'd isolate the. The stem cells, and then we would grow what we called rafts or fake skin. It was epidermis layers that mimicked basically, like, actual skin. And then we could see how HPV reacted within this fake skin without having to. Then. Without having to like, be like, hey, let's just stab some HPV in your arm and see what it does. [00:21:02] Speaker A: So what were you afraid this cannibal was gonna do with that? [00:21:07] Speaker B: I mean, eat. [00:21:08] Speaker A: Grow a penis. [00:21:10] Speaker B: Eat them. That's what I was afraid he was gonna do. [00:21:12] Speaker A: Oh, God help me, Jesus. Kids, talk about the covers. Just start talking about the covers. [00:21:28] Speaker B: This may be the last episode of. Regarding Spot effort, Johnny. No, it's not. Just too disturbed. John is too disturbed. Well, the covers of scorched 46. Johnny, what cover do you have? [00:21:38] Speaker A: The A cover. [00:21:39] Speaker B: You have the A cover? This cool Medieval Spawn cover. [00:21:42] Speaker A: Yeah, you'll spawn. It is by Francesco Mattina. [00:21:48] Speaker B: Mm. [00:21:48] Speaker A: He do both? [00:21:49] Speaker B: He did do both, yeah. [00:21:51] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:21:53] Speaker B: That's a bitchin. That's a bitch image. [00:21:55] Speaker A: Spawn on the battlefield. He's. He's on, as you can see, a banner behind him and like a mountain. Like he's in fucking Mordor or something. [00:22:03] Speaker B: Or like the. The battle at the beginning of Bram Stoker's Dracula directed by Francis Ford Coppola. Yeah, yeah. [00:22:13] Speaker A: It's kind of what it looks like. [00:22:15] Speaker B: Why do I gotta mention that? [00:22:17] Speaker A: Well, you're next to the director. [00:22:18] Speaker B: Oh. Just so that way everybody knows which Dracula I'm talking about. Okay. Even though its name is Bram Stoker's [00:22:25] Speaker A: Dracula, Francis Ford Coppola's apostrophe S. Bram Stroker. [00:22:31] Speaker B: So many possessives. Yeah. Dingus. [00:22:38] Speaker A: Yeah, she's whining. She doesn't like that movie. [00:22:41] Speaker B: That's. That's Dingus. He's the blind one. He's never seen it. And he's sad because of it. [00:22:46] Speaker A: He's like, I wish I could see it. [00:22:48] Speaker B: He says, I wish I could see Gary Oldman. And yeah, Medieval Spawn is just like he is post battle. He is covered in blood. Yep. And that helmet is primo. It's a good helmet. [00:23:03] Speaker A: It's choice. What's the B cover looking like? [00:23:06] Speaker B: I got the. The B cover, also by Francesco Mattina. And it is Redeemer with a big old glowing sword. It straight up looks like the action figure, like, perfectly like. I'm sure he used the action figure as a reference. It's. It's beautiful. There's a whole bunch of. Whole bunch of feathers floating around and stuff. Stuff. [00:23:29] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:23:31] Speaker B: Good as hell. [00:23:32] Speaker A: Well, we gotta crack this sucker open. [00:23:34] Speaker B: Yes, we do. [00:23:36] Speaker A: And as I said, I opened it when I was to read it said, yo, it's a lot of dialogue for score. So I looked to the left and it said, script plot by Todd McFarland. [00:23:45] Speaker B: Interesting. [00:23:46] Speaker A: Interesting. [00:23:47] Speaker B: John, what I was about to say, John Layman's jumping over to which one is he going to be on? Because Matthew Rosenberg is going to do Main Title and King Spawn. And John Lehman's moving to another one. Is John Lehman moving to Gunslinger? Which one is he jumping to? [00:24:07] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:24:08] Speaker B: I forgot already. But yeah, Steven Segovia is jumping to another book too. I think he's doing King Kingspun. [00:24:19] Speaker A: Okay. [00:24:19] Speaker B: I think he's doing. [00:24:20] Speaker A: I can't remember. There's a lot of shuffling. [00:24:22] Speaker B: A lot of shuffling. Every day they're shuffling. [00:24:26] Speaker A: Art by Raymond Gay, colors by Danae Ribeiro, Letting by and World Design. We already covered the covers. Creative Director is Tom McFarland and editor in chief is Thomas Healy. Previously in the Scorched. The Scorched face off against some of their greatest enemies. Changing the future as Redeemer knows it. Your dogs are pissed. [00:24:54] Speaker B: Yeah, Dingus is upset. It changed the future so much, Johnny, that it made the entire book look different. [00:25:01] Speaker A: It did. Scores has been Steven Segovi, except for a few choice issues pretty much the whole time. Yeah, he's missed a couple, but not very many. [00:25:09] Speaker B: Yeah. And I feel like it was mostly a couple of like, lead ins to an artist doing something on another book. [00:25:18] Speaker A: He probably just. They subbed for him, you know, it was like a tryout. [00:25:21] Speaker B: Yeah. So we. We start with some news, Johnny. Some news that we have covered a couple of times. And a couple. [00:25:30] Speaker A: Oregon creature. [00:25:31] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:32] Speaker A: And there's that. There it is again. C spawn 364 through C368. He was just like, copy paste, copy paste. [00:25:39] Speaker B: That's an easy day in the editing office. Yeah. [00:25:41] Speaker A: I don't blame it, like, you just. If you don't do. If you can get something knocked out. [00:25:45] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why not? Absolutely. [00:25:48] Speaker A: And then someone's watching like Anderson Cooper or some motherfucker. [00:25:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:52] Speaker A: Actually, sorry. That's the Senator. [00:25:55] Speaker B: The Senator. And that somebody, Johnny. That somebody who's watching this news is in fact Jessica Priest, AKA She Swan. [00:26:06] Speaker A: It's a great splash page on the second page. [00:26:08] Speaker B: Yeah, I like that. I like that she has a water bottle with stickers on it. Yeah. I don't know if I don't, you know. You don't like stickers on a water bottle? No, no. [00:26:22] Speaker A: Not gonna do it. [00:26:24] Speaker B: And she's, you know, she's disturbed by what the Senator is saying. Basically, like, we're gonna. We're gonna flush out all these people. And if they don't. If they don't come forward and Let us know who they are. We're gonna fight them. [00:26:37] Speaker A: Like they're calling a meeting. [00:26:39] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:26:39] Speaker A: He's like, you guys got to come here, meet with us. Tell us you're good, otherwise we'll fuck you up. [00:26:47] Speaker B: Yeah. The world has always been filled with both heroes and villains. Eventually, we'll find out what side you're on. [00:26:54] Speaker A: Jessica goes, christ, yeah. [00:26:59] Speaker B: Then. And then her. Her ex. So she's. She's in the gym doing a breather while she's watching this news. And then Redeemer comes in and is like, oh, hey, hey, Jessica. Did you see what they're talking about? We should probably go. Go talk to them. Yeah. Just like Reese is like, yeah, no, oh, wait, no, she wants to talk. She wants to talk to them. He wants to hide. He's like, let's go, let's go. Let's just run away. Let's just pretend like we never existed. She's like, they'll find us. Bury your head. [00:27:28] Speaker A: He has a classic Todd McFarlane tell. He says, so what, they're just gonna do this? He loves to do that. [00:27:35] Speaker B: Yeah, he does. And their. Their conversation cuts from them to a NASA facility, Aegis Aerospace. [00:27:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:27:45] Speaker B: And there's some people standing over a glowing green map being like, whoa, look at these. Look at these weird readings. We should probably inform somebody of all these weird readings. And then two hours later, the head of that project sends off his report to a boss man. And the boss man is like, you know, Gary, in the future, if you see any of this, don't tell anybody except for me, and tell me immediately. And Gary's like, that's not protocol. I'll. I'll lose my job. And the boss turns around and has glowing red eyes, and he says, you could lose your life if you don't. [00:28:23] Speaker A: See, this is where I'm going to say my first instance of this is a problem. [00:28:30] Speaker B: What problem? [00:28:31] Speaker A: The problem is, if you're talking about UAPs and extraterrestrials, NASA's got nothing to [00:28:37] Speaker B: do with it, okay? [00:28:38] Speaker A: Government won't let them touch it. It's the CIA, the FBI, the Air Force, the Department of Energy. [00:28:47] Speaker B: What about Space Force? [00:28:48] Speaker A: Space Force also has something to do with it. Now, that's why they were created. And private contractors. [00:28:55] Speaker B: Excellent. [00:28:56] Speaker A: NASA's been mainly cut out of the loop. They're like, just look far away. Don't pay attention. Because what I also want to mention is they say Russia and China when they're talking about this thing coming in on our airspace or in our space. Space. It's invading our space. Space. [00:29:13] Speaker B: Our space. [00:29:14] Speaker A: Space. She says Russia and China don't have the technology for this. In commonly accepted modern UFO lore, Russia did retrieve a craft that had an energy weapon on it and China has reverse engineered one of their mining tools and it sucks a mineral out of the rock and replaces it with like, matter. Interesting lasers. And they've replicated it. They can only power for like 20 seconds and it explodes or like they don't have enough energy to do it. But I've heard those are commonly accepted things. [00:29:49] Speaker B: Interesting. Very interesting. [00:29:52] Speaker A: Just saying. [00:29:53] Speaker B: Just saying. Well, Johnny, did they have. [00:29:55] Speaker A: What would you do if the government was like, yeah, there's aliens. [00:29:58] Speaker B: Haven't they. Haven't they done that like three times in the past? [00:30:00] Speaker A: I know. So what are they gonna actually just tell us? [00:30:03] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:30:04] Speaker A: What do you think's going on? You think it's a psyop? [00:30:06] Speaker B: Well, it's foolhardy to believe we're alone in the universe. [00:30:10] Speaker A: You don't think they're visiting? Someone's visiting somebody. [00:30:13] Speaker B: Somebody. I'm. I would be surprised if somebody hasn't visited. [00:30:17] Speaker A: Right. Come laugh at the monkeys. [00:30:20] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:21] Speaker A: Okay, just checking. [00:30:23] Speaker B: No, there's, there's definitely. There's definitely alien activity happening, Johnny. That's. It would be stupid to presume that there isn't. Yeah, it's got to be there. But to what extent and to what extent it's being covered up for reasons I have a feeling it's probably just whatever we're going to be able to discover is going to be low hanging fruit. And so it's basically going to be garbage. And so keeping it under wraps because you can't just say it's space garbage. It's basically, it's basically the meteorite from Joe Dirt. Right. Only aliens instead of plane poop. Plane poop, yeah. Did you ever see Joe Dirt? [00:31:08] Speaker A: I mean, I saw it. I don't have it fucking memorized. [00:31:10] Speaker B: That's the only bit I remember. He finds this big rock and he's like, I want to take this and make a lot of money out of it. And they're like, that's, that's frozen space poop from the space shuttle. [00:31:21] Speaker A: That's hilarious. That's what it is. [00:31:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:31:24] Speaker A: Yeah. So anyway, NASA wouldn't be monitoring these beans. It'd be private departments or something to do with intelligence ages. I just want to throw that out there. [00:31:32] Speaker B: Okay, well, thank you for keeping us honest, Johnny. [00:31:36] Speaker A: Yeah, Todd. But what they're monitoring is a giant. Kind of looks like a Locust. Demon locust. [00:31:43] Speaker B: It kind of, kind of looks a lot like the. Was it the Planet Eaters? Is that what they were called? [00:31:48] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, it's like, it's like a ship, but it's more like. [00:31:53] Speaker B: It looks, it looks like a, A ship made of existence technology. [00:31:58] Speaker A: Yeah, it's like, it's like a bioengineer. [00:32:01] Speaker B: Yeah, it's like a. It's like it's a being instead of, instead of a mechanism where it's asshole. [00:32:07] Speaker A: Is a giant repulsor. [00:32:09] Speaker B: Yeah. And it's this nice two page spread. And we get our, our opening reading with our tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands. [00:32:19] Speaker A: Longer. He doesn't say years. [00:32:24] Speaker B: He doesn't say what it is. Just hundreds of thousands. [00:32:27] Speaker A: And on that ship is a guy, a bad guy. [00:32:31] Speaker B: Well, on that ship's bridge is a bad guy and some lackeys. Inside the monstrosity of a vessel on the captain's deck, a small crew and its leader continue their evaluation. And it's Commander Belgic Belichick. [00:32:49] Speaker A: Is that a hockey player? [00:32:51] Speaker B: I have absolutely no idea. I was thinking of Belichick and that was Patriots I thought of. Or basketball coach Belichick. [00:33:04] Speaker A: Bill Belichick. [00:33:05] Speaker B: Yeah, that's basketball. That's basketball, I think. I don't know, I don't know who [00:33:09] Speaker A: for, but I was thinking of Belloc. [00:33:13] Speaker B: Better luck. The guy from [00:33:19] Speaker A: Raiders. [00:33:20] Speaker B: That was. Oh yeah, that was Raiders. I was trying to remember which. Indiana Jones. [00:33:25] Speaker A: That's just Raiders, baby. That's called Raiders. The Lost Ark. [00:33:28] Speaker B: Indiana Jones and the Raiders. [00:33:30] Speaker A: They added that later. [00:33:30] Speaker B: They added that later. [00:33:32] Speaker A: It was released as Raiders of the Lost Ark. [00:33:34] Speaker B: Oh, no. So it wasn't. It wasn't. So he. Star wars to that too. [00:33:38] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:33:39] Speaker B: Damn. Well, I guess the version I saw already, I. [00:33:44] Speaker A: The second one was Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. [00:33:47] Speaker B: Okay. [00:33:47] Speaker A: The first one was called Raiders the Lost Ark. [00:33:49] Speaker B: Okay, well then. Interesting. Good job, George Lucas. Thank you. [00:33:55] Speaker A: Star wars was just Star Wars. [00:33:56] Speaker B: Star wars was just Star Wars. [00:33:58] Speaker A: He likes to add subtitles. [00:33:59] Speaker B: He does after that. [00:34:01] Speaker A: Loves the cereal. [00:34:03] Speaker B: Sure does. And so these, these, this crew have been like, we want that. We want the humans to detect us. And they're like, they're like, yes, this is all part of the plan. They will see us and then we will launch our attack. And they're, they're trying to gather, they're trying to recon so that way they don't have to do too much fighting when they get there. So they can just kind of like get off the ship and just be like yeah, this is a our planet now. Right? [00:34:33] Speaker A: And he's like, my army has been prepared for Earth simple technology. Our main goal is not to cause too much damage upon arrival. Oh, my God. [00:34:42] Speaker B: Well, they. They don't want to have to rebuild the homes if there's already homes there they can live in. Yeah, you don't want to reinvent the real. The wheel. The real. And then we cut to the embassy building in Washington, D.C. in the front lobby, and it's Jessica Priest going in. She says she has an appointment with Trent MacAskill, and he just leaves her waiting. And Jessica Priest is not a lady you leave waiting. [00:35:06] Speaker A: Hell no Magazines is lobbying either. [00:35:09] Speaker B: No, he's got that potted plant. And then we cut into Trent MacAskill's office, and he's just talking on the phone, being like, yeah, yeah, honey, I'm gonna get off work on time. I don't. I don't have to stay late. No, no, no, no, no. Nobody's. Nobody's gonna keep me late here at all today. And then Jessica Priest comes in, and she's like, trent, you. And he's like, wait, what. Who are you? What are you doing in here? I'm gonna call my security guard. And after, you know, he's. He's hitting the. Furiously hitting the silent call button for his first security guard. And Jessica Priest is like, you know what I know. I know more than you do, Trent. You're gonna. You're not gonna. You're in danger, boy, basically, is what it comes down to. She's like, you need to listen to me, because I know a lot about a lot of this shit that's happening. [00:35:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:56] Speaker B: And so then the security card comes in, and he's like, is everything all right, sir? Entrant's like, yeah, yeah, never mind. I. I got too happy. [00:36:05] Speaker A: I forgot I had his appointment. [00:36:06] Speaker B: Yeah. And Jessica Priest is like, yeah, that's. That's. That's the number one problem right there. Your security guy. He's not your security guy. And Trent's like, what? What are you talking about? She says, let me show you. Tell him to bring the car around, that you've got a new appointment. He's like, okay, let's go. So they go to the parking garage, and Trent's like, hey, security guard man, whose name is Marcus, by the way, is like, I need you to drive me somewhere. I got a new appointment. And then Marcus shows up a couple minutes later. He's like, oh, sorry, boss. Sorry. I didn't see this on the schedule. [00:36:42] Speaker A: Yeah, he's trans you to a demon and masturbating in the corner. [00:36:45] Speaker B: Yeah. And so they start driving away and he's like, did your female visitor finally leave? And Jessica Priest pops up behind him and gives him the garrote to the throat. And she says, she didn't. Beautiful little bit. And then Trent's like, what are you doing? And Jessica Priest is like, he's not a human. Tell him. Tell him, Marcus. And then Marcus slowly shifts into what he is, which is an angel. [00:37:13] Speaker A: Yes. With red eyes and filed teeth. [00:37:16] Speaker B: Filed teeth. And so they, like, he. He shoots out some. Some heaven light and like, blows himself out of the car. And then Jessica Priest gets out of the. The car and is like, marcus, you motherfucker. And they. They get into some fisticuffs, Johnny. They get into some hot, hot, hot. And we get some nice Todd Father narration here about heaven and hell. Always forget that. That they are not the only ones who have a killer instinct. [00:37:51] Speaker A: And we see Jessica Priest has ripped Marcus's head off. [00:37:55] Speaker B: Yeah. And it's just like holding. She's got bloody hands. She's got head. And she's just like. [00:38:00] Speaker A: And that is the end of the issue. [00:38:03] Speaker B: That is the end of the issue. [00:38:04] Speaker A: She just rips his hat off. It's awesome. [00:38:07] Speaker B: Oh, boy. It is so great. [00:38:09] Speaker A: I cracked up. [00:38:10] Speaker B: Yeah. Because then it just goes right into the spawning grounds. There's not even a scorched skull, Johnny. No scorched skull. [00:38:16] Speaker A: You got Marcus's skull. She ripped his head off. [00:38:18] Speaker B: We had some cool. We get some cool fan art here. We get some. A lot of Jessica Priest art. Some. Some medieval art, some of the scorched all together art. Yeah, it's real good. You need more Sponge Universe, Johnny. [00:38:34] Speaker A: Yep. [00:38:35] Speaker B: Don't miss these ongoing titles. We got the core four there. Plus I saw Santa the. The new Christmas series, which I have, [00:38:42] Speaker A: but I have not read. [00:38:44] Speaker B: Same, same. But there is a December every year. So we'll get. [00:38:50] Speaker A: Yeah, we'll get to it. [00:38:51] Speaker B: We'll get there. [00:38:51] Speaker A: We can do a Christmas. How many? There's two of them, right? There's only two. [00:38:54] Speaker B: There's only two. I thought. Weren't this supposed to be used? [00:38:58] Speaker A: This would be a fourth something spawn Christmas. So we can do a month. [00:39:02] Speaker B: Yeah, we'll figure something out. We can do half an issue ever. [00:39:07] Speaker A: 75 of an issue every episode. [00:39:09] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:10] Speaker A: So one episode is the first 75 of one. And it's 25 of one and 50 of the next one. And the next one is 50 of that one and 25. [00:39:20] Speaker B: We promise. We don't hate listeners. We don't. We love you. [00:39:25] Speaker A: Except Virginia. [00:39:27] Speaker B: So we. We have a lot of. Virginia's been listening a lot lately. We have had twice now in the past four months, like, around 200 episodes downloaded all at once from Sterling, Virginia, which is very close to Washington, D.C. and I think that. That we have said something that has gotten us on somebody's list, and we are. [00:39:52] Speaker A: That freaks me out. [00:39:54] Speaker B: It freaks me out, too. But who do we know in Virginia that would warrant two discreet times of the entire catalog being downloaded? Johnny, we need to monitor the. The pizza delivery places around Sterling, Virginia. [00:40:13] Speaker A: I'm freaking out, man. [00:40:15] Speaker B: It's a good thing that we haven't set our addresses. [00:40:18] Speaker A: They know us. If they want to find this thing, [00:40:22] Speaker B: they can fucking find us. Do we get that? [00:40:24] Speaker A: I love it. [00:40:27] Speaker B: We could maybe. We could. We could have our own version of the succulent Chinese meal video of us being arrested. [00:40:34] Speaker A: What if it's just the aliens really are demons and spawn is, like, actually just true, and they're like, these guys are cast into this. [00:40:41] Speaker B: That's where. That's where Al Simmons is currently headquartered. [00:40:44] Speaker A: Yeah. He's like, these guys know what's up. [00:40:46] Speaker B: Who do you. Who do you think that they would send after us, respectively from the. The Spawn scorched cannon to. To. To bring us in? [00:40:56] Speaker A: I'm in Oklahoma. So they sang Javi. [00:40:58] Speaker B: They sent Javi. Who would. Who would they send for me? [00:41:01] Speaker A: Jessica Priest. [00:41:02] Speaker B: And I listen now, they'd probably send Mark Rosen and be like, he's a nerd. Just go talk nerd shit to him. [00:41:09] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:41:12] Speaker B: And then I would just be like, dad, dude, I'm good. I'm good. Just staying at home. And then he'd have to turn into medieval, and then I'd be like, ah, stab me. He would, like, stab me in places that I wouldn't bleed out. So that way I would just be in lots of pain. [00:41:27] Speaker A: That really freaks me out. You're freaking me out, David. Sterling, Virginia. Fucking downloading our episodes. [00:41:34] Speaker B: This is not. This is not a good episode for Johnny. I'm sorry. [00:41:37] Speaker A: Oh, my God. It's like I'm paranoid or something. [00:41:40] Speaker B: You know, you might be paranoid, but sometimes they are just out to get you. [00:41:45] Speaker A: You ever hear about the Noid Andrew Noid? [00:41:48] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. Who's the reason that the noid disappeared from Pizza Hut, Pizza Hut, Domino's Dominoes. [00:41:55] Speaker A: Yeah, I was talking to him. They're talking on him. His name was Andrew Noid. I'm pretty sure. [00:42:02] Speaker B: Yeah. He. [00:42:04] Speaker A: He Held up a Domino's with a gun in the 80s or late 80s. [00:42:10] Speaker B: Yeah. I think. I think I might have been alive but like oblivious to the world, not yet making memories. [00:42:19] Speaker A: I remember the Noid. [00:42:21] Speaker B: He was before my recollections. [00:42:23] Speaker A: I was also obsessed with advertisements. I remember Mac Tonight. [00:42:28] Speaker B: I mean, you do remember back tonight. Well then we did also kind of grow up in that, that era where there was always like when they. They had video games coming out. There was like the fucking. Everybody played the, the fucking seven Up Cool Spot game. That game was awesome. [00:42:43] Speaker A: Spot was great. [00:42:44] Speaker B: I was. I was obsessed with the Coca Cola polar bears. [00:42:48] Speaker A: Right. We talked about that. I had a 7 up spot that I carried around. [00:42:52] Speaker B: Yeah. Very heavily indebted to advertising. And then like, I fucking, I fucking loved Garfield and Jim Davis was just like, please do give me money and would like license Garfield out for fucking everything. Yeah, yeah. [00:43:07] Speaker A: I mean, everyone's gonna get with those fat cat books, man. Remember those? The three packs? [00:43:12] Speaker B: Yeah, the three packs. The. I liked. I liked that they were. All the individual books were some sort of fat joke and they had Garfield responding to the fat joke on the front. [00:43:25] Speaker A: I like the. I like the collection of the Sunday comics. [00:43:28] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, those are good. [00:43:30] Speaker A: Who invented that formula? Because Sunday comments are bigger and they're in color. [00:43:34] Speaker B: I don't know, I'm assuming some sort of Stan Lee type person. Yeah, an old, an old fashioned showman being like, we got to make it special. Nobody's working on Sunday. [00:43:45] Speaker A: It's a Sunday paper. [00:43:49] Speaker B: Definitely a J. Jonah Jameson type. Yeah, yeah. Then we got the image, classic sad. And the back toy ad is the Diablo 4 fingers. [00:44:00] Speaker A: Love Diablo. [00:44:01] Speaker B: Diablo 4 fingers. Wait, what? What Diablo 4 fingers. They got one cut off. Speaking of, apparently if you're gonna voluntarily have a finger removed, the best one to have to remove is apparently the middle finger because it's the one that does the least amount of independent work. [00:44:20] Speaker A: So if I ever get kicked out of the Yakuza. [00:44:22] Speaker B: Yeah. You should ask for them to cut off your middle finger because your pinky is actually very important for maximum thumb usage. [00:44:29] Speaker A: Okay. [00:44:31] Speaker B: But nobody wants to. [00:44:32] Speaker A: Nobody wants to get a lone shark [00:44:34] Speaker B: or, I don't know, you know, whatever. [00:44:37] Speaker A: Well, that's scorched 46. [00:44:39] Speaker B: Sure is. [00:44:50] Speaker A: Why they listen to US in Washington, [00:44:52] Speaker B: D.C. i have absolutely no fucking idea. Dude. It's freaking. [00:44:55] Speaker A: Laughing about Charlie Kirk. [00:44:57] Speaker B: It's freaking. It's freaking me out because it's not once. It's twice. Twice it's happened now. [00:45:02] Speaker A: Why? I don't know. And also I just want to put it on the air. I'm not suicidal. If I show up dead, it's the government. [00:45:11] Speaker B: Absolutely. [00:45:12] Speaker A: Yeah. I have. [00:45:13] Speaker B: Oh. Oh, yes. I am not suicidal. If I wind up dead, it's. I probably got hit by a bus or the government. [00:45:20] Speaker A: You're afraid of saying it's the government because you know they're coming for you. [00:45:24] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't know. [00:45:26] Speaker A: What. What? [00:45:27] Speaker B: What. [00:45:27] Speaker A: What government presence is there in Sterling, Virginia? [00:45:29] Speaker B: I don't. I don't fucking know. [00:45:31] Speaker A: I'm too scared to look it up. It's not a city. It's a census designated place. What does that mean, census? [00:45:45] Speaker B: That makes absolutely no sense. Census data, designated place. [00:45:48] Speaker A: It's a concentration of population defined by the United States Census Bureau for statistical purposes only. So it's not a city. It's just a bunch of villages. It's like. It's tiny ass. It's like a bunch of villages and towns and shit. [00:46:00] Speaker B: So what you're saying is it's just a place where people go to work. [00:46:04] Speaker A: I don't know, dude. [00:46:05] Speaker B: That's fucking weird. [00:46:06] Speaker A: It's very close to Dulles Airport. [00:46:08] Speaker B: That's weird. We should. We should probably just stop thinking about it and get on to the curse of Shirley Johnson, too, Jim. [00:46:14] Speaker A: Yeah, we should. The dog wants to. [00:46:16] Speaker B: Yeah. Little puppy says, just get on with it. [00:46:19] Speaker A: On with the show. Shirley Johnson, number two. [00:46:25] Speaker B: There are a couple of covers on this one, too. [00:46:26] Speaker A: A couple covers. I got the A cover. [00:46:28] Speaker B: The Jonathan. [00:46:29] Speaker A: Jonathan Glapian. [00:46:31] Speaker B: It's real nice. [00:46:32] Speaker A: It's the Stranger and the Bad guy. [00:46:36] Speaker B: They're used in the middle, pondering an [00:46:38] Speaker A: orb with our titular hero in it [00:46:43] Speaker B: with Mr. Teddy T. Mr. Teddy T. There's some nice lightning and swoopy red stuff in the background. [00:46:54] Speaker A: That's cool. [00:46:55] Speaker B: Yeah, Jonathan Glapion does good work. I have the B cover done by Dan Panossian. And it is just. It's creepy as shit. [00:47:05] Speaker A: It's creepy. [00:47:07] Speaker B: It's just. It's just Shirley Johnson with her red eyes just, like, staring up at you like she's about to bounce, Stabbing the guts. Yeah, it's. It's given. It's given real Annabelle vibes. [00:47:21] Speaker A: Yes. [00:47:23] Speaker B: It's creepy as hell. I want to. I want to get this off. There we go. I got to open the book, so. I don't. [00:47:28] Speaker A: Yeah, open that. I don't. Looking at me. [00:47:30] Speaker B: Creep. It's creepy. We got to give credit where it's due, Johnny. We got the script plot by Daniel Enriquez, got the art by Jonathan Glapion. Color by FCO Plasencia and World Design is doing the. The lettering. We covered the covers. Todd McFarlane is the creative director and the editor in chief is Thomas. The hardest working man in show business. Keely. Previously in the curse of Shirley Johnson. Shirley Johnson, the last victim of Billy Kincaid, awakens to find herself alone and trapped in hell. That is, until a stranger arrives. Yeah, yeah, that's what happens, basically. Yeah. And then we open on a gizmo that some people are talking about. It's a medallion. And like the medallion opens an eye in the middle of it. [00:48:28] Speaker A: Oh my God. [00:48:29] Speaker B: Oh, geez. And they're. One of them is. One of them is a vampire. Because the other one's like, come on, Simon, tell us again how a vampire ends up in hell. Yeah, and how do you whack that sorcerer for this medallion? So it's a sorcerer's medallion, Johnny. And the vampire says, later, when we're back for now, take the eye like we practiced. Gentle hands. And then we hear two voices say, steady hearts. And then there's like a glowing. A glowing fire ring. And we see that there is the vampire. And the two voices speaking together come from the same body. Two heads, one body. I got some conjoined twins here, Johnny. [00:49:12] Speaker A: Yeah, they open like. They open like a stargate. [00:49:15] Speaker B: Yeah, they're seeking the lost to bring them home. [00:49:18] Speaker A: And they open their portal right where we left Shirley Johnson last. [00:49:22] Speaker B: Yeah. Right behind the crazy spider monster lady. And the vampire walks through the portal and goes, oh, shit. Fuck. [00:49:31] Speaker A: Watch out. [00:49:32] Speaker B: Wasn't expecting that. And the spider lady says, more to which meat. Eat. Eat the red. Snap the bones. Slap the light. [00:49:49] Speaker A: Oh my God. [00:49:51] Speaker B: And Shirley Johnson's just still skewered on her finger there. Yep, this big. This lady's creepy. Spider lady's creepy. She's got like all her children on her back like a spider does. [00:50:03] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Mm. [00:50:07] Speaker B: It's a beautiful two page spread. [00:50:08] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, it's really creepy. [00:50:11] Speaker B: And then we go to. We turn the page and we see Shirley Johnson's face up close. And she gets so mad that like, she shoots blood out of her nose and her eyes go real wild and her teeth start gnashing. [00:50:27] Speaker A: Yeah, she cracks her teeth. [00:50:29] Speaker B: Yeah. She says, let's try that again, but this time try and make some real damage. And like she. She just like demons out and just like starts gnawing on spider lady's finger. And Spider demon lady just like flips her off like a booger. Just. Phew. [00:50:50] Speaker A: She lands with a thud. [00:50:52] Speaker B: Mm. And we see the stranger is still there, like, struggling. He's, you know, he lost his arm, so he's just like, grr. On the ground. And Shirley Johnson is just full of piss and vinegar here. She said that spider bitch. Rich off spider bitch ripped off your arm and took my freaking heart. I can fix this, even if I gotta rip every leg off those bug eyed freaks. [00:51:19] Speaker A: So Shirley Johnson is gonna attack her. [00:51:22] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:22] Speaker A: But then her little. Her like drones. [00:51:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:28] Speaker A: Like her children, like little skeleton babies. [00:51:33] Speaker B: Yeah. She directs them to attack, tells them to feed. Flesh. Take the flesh. And the vampires back there like, oh, this is bad. Oh, this is bad. Shirley. Shirley, get over here. And Shirley's just like, who. Who are you? [00:51:52] Speaker A: So he says, by God, we really found you again. Who is this man? [00:51:57] Speaker B: Who is this guy? [00:51:58] Speaker A: But he has a S on his forehead. [00:52:00] Speaker B: He sure does. Kind of like super vampire. But, you know, Shirley doesn't have too much time to be distracted because these little things are bearing down on her. She says, God left me down here to rot, to know better than Spawn or the bad man. I prayed to him. All I got back, silence and pain. And so these little. These little minions of the spider lady start attacking her. And, you know, they start trying to bite her. And she's just like, fighting him off as well as she can. And the vampire comes in, swinging a sword around and is like, shirley, please come with me. So he's working on these little guys from one end and Shirley's working on them from another. You know, she's. She's tearing at him with her teeth. [00:52:51] Speaker A: She's going, super Saiyan. [00:52:52] Speaker B: Yeah, she's like biting their ears off. She's pulling a Mike Tyson. [00:52:57] Speaker A: Doing a Tyson. [00:52:58] Speaker B: And the strangers, they are just like, oh, no. Oh, no. Don't, don't, don't. Get away from them. I can. I can hurt them, but I'd hurt you too. And Shirley just says, relax, I got this. And the stranger, just like with some really super Saiyan. Yeah, he really does. Oh, he's got a whole bunch of lightning. He's got a sonic boom. [00:53:26] Speaker A: They have to turn the book. [00:53:28] Speaker B: Yeah. And this is a. This is a revelation that. Because Shirley's. Shirley's like, don't worry. They took your family. They killed your family. I'm gonna take care of this. And he's like, no, no, no. They didn't take my family. [00:53:38] Speaker A: I killed everybody. [00:53:39] Speaker B: He killed them. He killed them all. Probably doing this thing that he did. And so he's got. That. [00:53:44] Speaker A: He killed gunslinger. He killed Chapel, he killed Jessica. He killed the violators. He killed. [00:53:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:51] Speaker A: Owl. Owl spawn. [00:53:55] Speaker B: This cool. This cooler, like, gunslinger bandito spawn. Yeah. [00:54:01] Speaker A: Space ghost spawn at the top. [00:54:03] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:54:04] Speaker A: He looks like space ghost. [00:54:06] Speaker B: It's real good. It's real good. [00:54:08] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:54:08] Speaker B: And then at the bottom, there's just a guy with last issue. This is interesting or fascinating. [00:54:16] Speaker A: And he says, an awakening here of all places. It cuts to this vast man. [00:54:21] Speaker B: It's the bottom of this big staircase. [00:54:24] Speaker A: The Last one was 70,000 years ago, and it ended with a new ruler on the throne. Now this imposter queen attacks The Earth Sea. Spawns364.364. [00:54:34] Speaker B: Surprised that they didn't put that in there. And then he calls. He calls force his knights. He says, my plans have changed. I know where they are. Call him my strongest. The ripple has begun. Leave now. Go as fast as you can. And then we cut from there too. We see Bootsy. [00:54:55] Speaker A: Bootsy's on a mission. [00:54:56] Speaker B: Bootsy. Bootsy found something that he saw last time. And so he's running. He's running. And he's like, oh, boy. [00:55:01] Speaker A: Oh. [00:55:02] Speaker B: Oh, boy. I gotta. So he's running past these, like, cages of. Of. I don't know if they're people. I don't know if they're angels. I don't know if they're demonstrating cages. And he. He runs. He runs into this guy named Crimson who's just all eyes. [00:55:18] Speaker A: He's all eyes, baby. [00:55:20] Speaker B: He's all eyes. [00:55:21] Speaker A: He just. He looks like a lizard. The thing. [00:55:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:55:27] Speaker A: Full of eyes. [00:55:28] Speaker B: Yeah. He apps. That's a great description of him. And Bootsy's is like, actually, I was looking for you, Crimson. We learned that Bootsy's name is actually Bella Bella Zico. [00:55:43] Speaker A: Bella Zico. [00:55:44] Speaker B: Bella Zico. And. And Bootsy's just like, I got a couple unknown anomalies. I need you to look into it. And Crimson's just like, spare me your little crush on humans. And Boots is like, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is something. This is something more. This is something real, raw, untamed power. The Crimson is like, what? Why didn't you. Why didn't you lead with that? Take me to him. And Bootsy's like, they're. They're in belly of Fawn's territory, so it won't be easy. And Crimson says, I don't care. I'll smash anything that gets him. So they're on the look for the stranger. Yep. [00:56:23] Speaker A: And he's in the middle of a crater. Yeah. [00:56:26] Speaker B: Because he did his explosion crater that he made himself. And we get some. Some narration from Shirley. She's like, one day, that's all it's been. And we see that Shirley Johnson is. You know, she got caught up in the blast, and she's all. The vampire and his conjoined twins are under a little protective bubble that they cast forth. She says it's one day since the bad man killed her for the last time. And the conjoined twins are talking to the vampire, and they're like, who's that guy? How can he do what he just did with all the lightning and the. And the vampire says, that's no man. That's judgment wrapped in flesh and flame. You know, Shirley. Shirley gets up and she's like, oh, you okay, Teddy T. It's the first thing she's worried about, making sure Teddy T. Is good. [00:57:19] Speaker A: She said, he said he killed them all. Yeah, I was wrong. I thought, he's my shield. But he's a bomb. [00:57:24] Speaker B: He's the bomb. And when he went off the crown permit, mountains crumbled. And then she's got, like, a little sly grin. She says, I knew it. You're back in one piece. [00:57:36] Speaker A: But he runs at him. [00:57:37] Speaker B: He runs at her. Yeah, he's got his big flaming sword, and he's like. And she says, what are you doing? And the vampire, he's like, oh, no. I will not fail you again, Lord. And he runs, and he, you know, puts his little tiny sword up to block. To block the stranger's big, massive anime sword. And, well, it doesn't do any good. It just slices through the sword and right into the vampire. Yeah. And then we see on the other side of the vampire, Shirley Johnson actually has the sword caught in her hands and is holding it. And even though there's blood going everywhere, it doesn't look like there's any blood coming out of Shirley's hands, Johnny. Like, she is immune to the edge of the sword. [00:58:24] Speaker A: She's very powerful. [00:58:26] Speaker B: She is. She is. [00:58:29] Speaker A: The vampire man says, go. I'll hold them back. Yeah, surely it's like, no more running. [00:58:36] Speaker B: And then as the vampire. As the vampire dies, the stranger, like his. His lightning fizzles, stops crackling. And he's just, like, left smoking. He's like, wait, what? What if I. No. And then, Johnny, he says, your favorite thing. What have I done? [00:58:54] Speaker A: I love you, Anakin. [00:58:56] Speaker B: We end on just a. A splash page of Shirley Johnson's face. And she says, I feel stronger. This power ain't mine. But I'm taking it. I'm taking all of it. [00:59:06] Speaker A: And she's got eyes are glowing. [00:59:08] Speaker B: The glowing green necroplasm eyes. One goddamn day and I'm already not the same girl died yesterday. [00:59:17] Speaker A: Oh my God. Holy. Then we get a spawn skull down the issue. [00:59:22] Speaker B: Sure do. Then we get that new generation, new stories, new uad. Very nice. Got the image classic set. Then we got the Warhammer Space marines and the Diablo 4 toy ads. [00:59:36] Speaker A: Well, Lottie freaking die, dude. [00:59:39] Speaker B: Yeah. That's what they do. And that is the curse of Shirley Johnson number two. Johnny. [00:59:43] Speaker A: Very fun. [00:59:44] Speaker B: It was good. It was a good time. It was a good time. [00:59:47] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:59:47] Speaker B: Well, it appears that there's no longer a peanut gallery of dogs, Johnny. They've. They've all settled down. [00:59:54] Speaker A: That's good. [00:59:55] Speaker B: So I guess that means it's time for us to rate some puppies. [00:59:58] Speaker A: It's time to rate the puppies. So first up we had scores. 46. Written by the Todd Father himself. [01:00:08] Speaker B: Couldn't tell. [01:00:09] Speaker A: Just a little bit. Just a little bit. [01:00:12] Speaker B: It's a little bit. A little bit of the. The excessiveness peppered in there. [01:00:16] Speaker A: Touch of the Todd. [01:00:17] Speaker B: It's. It was good. It was good. [01:00:20] Speaker A: It was good. I was proud of him. I'm proud of you, Todd. It was a big issue. Big shoes to fill. We've had Segovia and Layman knocking out of the park. But he's. He was hell bent. In October of 2020 or November 2025, this big event's happening. We gotta read all the books. [01:00:42] Speaker B: Absolutely. [01:00:44] Speaker A: I enjoyed it. [01:00:46] Speaker B: It was good. [01:00:47] Speaker A: I love the ending. I love that she's rips his head off and it ends. I laughed out loud. [01:00:53] Speaker B: I feel like that was the first thing that Todd Father wrote. And he's like Jessica Priest just rips ahead off. How do we get there? [01:00:58] Speaker A: How do we get there? Let's work backwards from there. But it's good. I mean, I don't know. It's again, it's kind of what we ran into last week with Gunslinger and Spawn where they're kind of just fall out of like. Remember this event that happened? Did everyone read the event? [01:01:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:01:12] Speaker A: The trip's out now. [01:01:14] Speaker B: Yeah. Maybe. Maybe a couple of. Maybe a couple of nucleation points where stories could form off from here after the end of a bigger story. [01:01:25] Speaker A: You know, Marvel does that and DC does that. So like I'll let him do ripples a little bit. But it'll die down and there'll be another event. [01:01:33] Speaker B: That's just how this. That's just how this form works. That's how these stories go. [01:01:36] Speaker A: Yeah. But I liked It. It was fun. It was a kind of a. Didn't release the electricity. I mean, there was a big climax last time. [01:01:45] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [01:01:46] Speaker A: On the scorch and just, like, coming down from that. But I'm gonna give it three. Jessica Priest and yoga pants out of five. [01:01:57] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. [01:01:58] Speaker A: Is that creepy? I'm sorry. [01:02:00] Speaker B: I don't know. But I did. Hell, yeah. So if I say it's creepy, then that makes me creepy, too. [01:02:05] Speaker A: I'm gonna change it. [01:02:07] Speaker B: Okay. [01:02:08] Speaker A: I'm gonna. But you keep that in, too. I'm gonna Change it to 3. China and Russia have alien technology. And so do we. Out of five. [01:02:17] Speaker B: Nice. It's a beautiful score. I like it. It's good. It was fun. It's a linking issue at the end of such a climactic story ending from the previous issue. We really don't expect much other than just, like, a breather. Perfect breather. This issue. [01:02:39] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:02:41] Speaker B: I'm excited. I'm scorched fucking rocks. Jessica Priest fucking ripping people's heads off. It's great. [01:02:47] Speaker A: In parking garages. [01:02:48] Speaker B: Yeah. It's very Highlander. Mm. I'm gonna give this three. Hundreds of thousands, Johnny. [01:02:58] Speaker A: Hundreds of thousands of what, David? [01:03:00] Speaker B: Just three of them. Okay, [01:03:05] Speaker A: next up, we had Curse of Shirley Johnson Number two. And I love this book. I love where it's going. [01:03:12] Speaker B: This book is. [01:03:13] Speaker A: This book is crazy around it while using the lore and just building on our expectations. And it's got me very intrigued about where it's going. I'm gonna give it four and a half. Teddy T's. [01:03:27] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. [01:03:27] Speaker A: It's a great five, and the art's fantastic. Like. Like I said, there's an interview with John Galapian. Or maybe it's when he talked at spawncon. I think this is when I heard. This is when he said that I just want to draw something that wasn't, like, a city street and. [01:03:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:03:41] Speaker A: Like, I wanted. And Dan Henriques said he come up with that. I just every. Like, that's what's so great. They're mining that, like, early 90s vision of hell because, like, Basil's like. Or not Basil. Whoops. Sorry, Violator. You're dead or out of commission in this issue. No, not. What's his. Bootsy, but Bella Zekel. I love how when he. They fly, like, to, like, other parts of hell, they're, like, in. Like in heaven and they're, like, in clouds, and they're in hell, and it's just all over the place. It's great. [01:04:11] Speaker B: It's great. It's beautiful. This. This book just rocks. [01:04:16] Speaker A: And that. That last image of Shirley Johnson's great. Yeah. She's building its own lore while building on Spawn lore. [01:04:22] Speaker B: She's so. She's so creepy, and she's got the. She's. She had already. She had already absorbed so much of that Spawn power from having to be, you know, in the fridge while Spawn poofs out and reliving that every night. And she's just. She's just so full of it. It's. Oh, I love where it's going. It's great. And I. I agree. It's just a great book. I'm gonna. I'm gonna give it four and a half bootsies, Johnny. I can't give it any. I love a Bootsy. I still notice a human hat. He's got the. Like, his wrestling mask and then his. His hat. In case we didn't recognize him from his boots, he's got his hat. Justice. [01:05:07] Speaker A: Justice for Bobby Ernest P. Worrell. Bootsy. [01:05:13] Speaker B: He's. Yeah, I was thinking of. I was thinking of Sylvester the. [01:05:18] Speaker A: The cat? [01:05:19] Speaker B: No, the. The cracked mascot. [01:05:23] Speaker A: Oh. [01:05:24] Speaker B: His name was Sylvester something because he had a hat kind of like that. But he was also wearing, like, janitor coveralls. [01:05:30] Speaker A: Yeah, he was a. He's a porter. [01:05:32] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, that's. Those puppies rated, Johnny. Yes, they're very good puppies. You know what else is very good, Johnny? [01:05:41] Speaker A: Our friends on Instagram. [01:05:42] Speaker B: Our friends on Instagram. And this week, we would like to shout out one Frank Castingway who posts pictures instagram.com Billy_Machette. M A C H E T T E. And he's got that second. [01:06:03] Speaker A: Okay, [01:06:05] Speaker B: He's. He's got a lot of. So he's an artist. He does a lot of spawn work. He also does, you know, a lot of Batman work because, you know, if you're doing an art in comics, you're doing some Batman. He's got some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle figure art, which fucking. Here for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. [01:06:24] Speaker A: You love Ninja Turtles. Oh, my God, dude, I wish you had a fucking blue HD player. You see Arrow video release, like a collector's edition of the original three movies on 4K. [01:06:34] Speaker B: Shit. [01:06:35] Speaker A: I probably would have bought it for you for Christmas if your fucking ass would have had a 4K player. [01:06:39] Speaker B: Yeah, it wasn't a Blu Ray. [01:06:42] Speaker A: I would have bought it for you. [01:06:43] Speaker B: He's also. He's also got some Star wars art, which I know is very exciting, but he does. He does a lot of miniatures with Weathering. It's. It's real good. It's real good shit. So go. Go see. Go see Frank at BillyMachette. It's great. Speaking of great, Johnny, our music is done by the great Lonnie Bones. [01:07:03] Speaker A: Lonnie Bones. He's not a skeleton. But he might be. [01:07:06] Speaker B: He might be. I mean, he's a skeleton. Somewhere underneath it all, he is a skeleton. [01:07:10] Speaker A: Hopefully he is not. [01:07:11] Speaker B: He is not only a skeleton. [01:07:13] Speaker A: What's your friend who's picking on his bones? [01:07:16] Speaker B: Oh boy. While you're. While you're on the Internet giving love to Mr. Frank and Mr. Lonnie Bones. Give us love to us. Come. We're on Instagram too, at. Regarding SpawnPod and we have an email. Yes, we do. Regarding SpawnPodmail.com Very nice simpatico. You and I. [01:07:35] Speaker A: Absolutely. [01:07:36] Speaker B: We both. We both think the same disgusting things. [01:07:39] Speaker A: No, we don't. I'm not like you. I don't watch gore stuff on the Internet. I don't think about people eating people. I don't fucking think about. About foreskins. I don't do any of that. [01:07:50] Speaker B: Sure, Johnny. Sure, Johnny. [01:07:51] Speaker A: I don't. I really don't. I'm not a gorehound. [01:07:55] Speaker B: Yeah, that's true. I wonder if people meeting us without knowing this background, which would they know one of us is filthy nasty. [01:08:05] Speaker A: Cuz I like the horror T search and. But I'm like. I like gore to movies and it was fake. [01:08:10] Speaker B: Yeah, that's true. [01:08:12] Speaker A: I don't love gore like some. Like, I don't love the terrifiers. They're a little too much for me. [01:08:17] Speaker B: It's. There's, there's a certain amount of. What's the word? I'm looking. There's a certain amount of malevolence that you skip over with movie violence that the terrifier just plays into. And it's, it's like I can't watch a movie or television show where everybody's just a terrible person. It's really hard to watch something I [01:08:38] Speaker A: would never want to. I watched one and two. I didn't see three. I would never want to watch two again. [01:08:43] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't think I'm watching the first one. Yeah, it's. It's, it's rough. [01:08:46] Speaker A: They're not bad. They're good, what they do. [01:08:48] Speaker B: Yeah, it's, it's, it's. [01:08:49] Speaker A: People love it. It's huge. [01:08:51] Speaker B: So that's great. But it's not, it's not an enjoyable time. No. After a certain point. [01:08:58] Speaker A: No, it's not. [01:08:59] Speaker B: No. But regarding spun pot. Gmail.com. we love getting emails. And right now, if you send us an email for why you should receive a trade paperback of the 1993 Violator miniseries in the mail, we will send it to you. [01:09:14] Speaker A: We're talking to you. Sterling, Virginia. [01:09:16] Speaker B: Yeah, just give me an address for your census designated population zone. [01:09:22] Speaker A: Oh, God. That's a fucking. It's a census. It's not even a city. Well, it's even creepier for some reason. [01:09:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, boy. Well, you know what else is pretty creepy? Johnny Spawn. Spawn. You know what else is even creepier than the spawn that we read this week? [01:09:40] Speaker A: I'll be the judge of that. [01:09:41] Speaker B: The Spawn that we have left to read. [01:09:43] Speaker A: What is it? [01:09:44] Speaker B: So for. For next episode, why don't we read. Why don't we have another rootin tootin fun time with some gunslingers? We've got Gunslinger 49 and Deadly Tales of the Gunslinger 11. [01:09:53] Speaker A: I don't think this is gonna be creepier than Shirley Johnson, too. I'm just saying. [01:09:56] Speaker B: Definitely not. Although we are dealing with the fucking cave monsters and deadly tales. Those are pretty. That's. It's pretty creepy. [01:10:03] Speaker A: Yeah. Like in the Descent. [01:10:05] Speaker B: Yeah, the Descent is a good movie. [01:10:08] Speaker A: It is good. [01:10:09] Speaker B: It was really good. I had very low expectations for it. I just didn't really know what I was getting into and. [01:10:14] Speaker A: No, you were like, oh, a bunch of women. [01:10:16] Speaker B: What is. What is? I remember because I. I didn't see it until. I think it had been. It had been out for, like, 10 years by the time I had seen it. [01:10:27] Speaker A: Oh, really? I saw it, like. And within, like, six to eight months of its release. [01:10:30] Speaker B: Yeah. So it. It had been a long time since it had been released. And I was like, I kind of remember the trailer and I don't remember, but. No, it blew me the away. It was great. [01:10:39] Speaker A: It's good. [01:10:40] Speaker B: It's real good. [01:10:42] Speaker A: So, yeah, let's descend into some gunslingers. [01:10:46] Speaker B: Let's do it. Let's do it, Johnny. Sounds good to me. And. Well, I think. I think. [01:10:55] Speaker A: Are you gonna say something else is gonna freak me out? [01:10:58] Speaker B: I think I don't have anything to say that won't freak you out. Besides, may the scorch be with you. [01:11:06] Speaker A: And also with you, David. [01:11:08] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. [01:11:09] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. All right. I don't feel that freaked out. You calmed me down. [01:11:13] Speaker B: I just. [01:11:14] Speaker A: It was so nonchalant that that guy you knew wanted to eat some lungs. [01:11:17] Speaker B: I mean. What. [01:11:17] Speaker A: That's a crazy story, okay? You gotta admit, that's a crazy, like, look at the outside. It's crazy story. [01:11:24] Speaker B: Yeah. It is a very crazy story, but [01:11:26] Speaker A: I'm sorry, I'm dwelling on it. [01:11:27] Speaker B: No, no, it's, it's, it's fine. It gets. It was questionable behavior. Absolutely. But I guess it's. [01:11:36] Speaker A: I think, I think it'll make good content. I think people enjoy hearing squirm about the story. [01:11:40] Speaker B: I think, I think it's just one of the reasons why I crave. The ability to make sure that I still feel correctly about things. [01:11:49] Speaker A: I thought you were gonna say why you crave lungs. Oh, [01:11:58] Speaker B: you know, I work in. I work in a. I work in a weird field. I mean, things that I think that are normal. You're over here being like. Yeah. Did I ever tell you that one of the. One of the studies that we services collected teeth and so we had to deal with teeth? [01:12:14] Speaker A: Good night, everybody. No, I'm kidding. That's like a horror. You look at this thing? A horror movie. [01:12:19] Speaker B: Yeah, I, Yeah, I was like. I was the tooth fairy. Just like teeth. [01:12:25] Speaker A: Where'd they get them? 9, 11. [01:12:27] Speaker B: They were, they were, they were baby teeth for children. Children. [01:12:33] Speaker A: Why are you taking baby stuff? [01:12:35] Speaker B: It was a study that was concerned about HIV positive mothers on certain antiretrovirals that kept them from transferring HIV to their babies at the point of birth. And they were just testing everything they could for latent levels of that particular medicine in the child as they grow up, up to like the age of seven. So they were collecting regular blood samples, hair samples, teeth samples, just to make sure that the drug that they gave their mother to ensure that the child didn't get HIV doesn't have lingering long term effects. [01:13:10] Speaker A: You're cooked, dude. The government knows you do that test now, you're fucking done. They know exactly where you are. [01:13:15] Speaker B: I'm sure they do. I'm sure they do. [01:13:16] Speaker A: Send it to alien Dr. Demons. [01:13:18] Speaker B: In order. In order to do a lot of these studies with government money, I have to do certain amounts of testing every few months. [01:13:27] Speaker A: You ever test anything on an alien? [01:13:29] Speaker B: No, not yet at least. They haven't told me it's alien because I, I just see the samples when they show up. I don't see the particular participants. So maybe. [01:13:38] Speaker A: Oh, you might be unwillingly doing experiments on aliens. [01:13:41] Speaker B: Maybe. [01:13:44] Speaker A: Maybe we're the aliens. [01:13:47] Speaker B: We're alien to somebody, that's for sure. [01:13:52] Speaker A: Yeah, good manners. 100,000. Why? He didn't even say it. [01:14:33] Speaker B: Well, hundreds of thousands, Johnny. It's. He's talking sprinkles. He's talking sprinkles. Yeah. [01:14:40] Speaker A: Like what? Hundreds and thousands. [01:14:45] Speaker B: We'll get into it. [01:14:47] Speaker A: Hi. Hey, hey, Patooy. All right, here we go.