Episode 150 - Medieval Spawn (2025) #1 with guest Bran Moorehead!

[00:00:00] Speaker A: You smell that, Cuthbert? Like the devil's piss. Good evening and welcome to the Mal Bulge. This is regarding Spawn, the world's best spawn podcast. I am your co host, John Fisher. [00:00:45] Speaker B: And I am your co host, David Williams. And speaking of the devil's piss, this. This dog is full of the devil's piss right now. [00:00:53] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:00:55] Speaker B: He's just going crazy, so he's probably gonna mess something up. Sorry about that, Johnny. Happy 1 50th. [00:01:01] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Welcome, everyone, to our 150th celebration. And what's a party without friends? [00:01:07] Speaker B: Absolutely. [00:01:08] Speaker A: And we have a friend this week. We have. This is your fifth time, I believe. [00:01:14] Speaker C: Is it really? I was gonna say it's at least third, but is it five? [00:01:18] Speaker A: It might be four. It's four or five. Fresh off the Star Wars Episode 3 episode back May. Back in May, we have returning guest Bran Morehead. [00:01:29] Speaker C: What up? [00:01:30] Speaker B: Hey. Hey. [00:01:31] Speaker A: Welcome back. [00:01:32] Speaker B: Welcome, welcome. [00:01:33] Speaker C: Not fully. [00:01:34] Speaker A: We're doing. We're doing it. We're doing it 150. And we've done more than 150 episodes. Yeah, but we don't count the specials as numerical episodes because they don't have Spawn. [00:01:44] Speaker B: Well. [00:01:45] Speaker A: Well, they're like. Yeah, C2, E2. Or like 1. [00:01:49] Speaker B: Or the star wars or the Christmas episode. The Christmas episode. [00:01:51] Speaker C: Yeah, the Comic Book Shop 1. I was on that. [00:01:54] Speaker A: Yeah, you were there for that. [00:01:56] Speaker C: Helped record with that. I forgot about that. [00:01:58] Speaker A: I think that was your. Yeah, so that's why it's five. I think that's the one you're probably not thinking of. [00:02:02] Speaker C: Yeah. Christmas, Christmas, Star Wars. [00:02:06] Speaker B: 350 Star Wars. [00:02:09] Speaker A: All the good times. [00:02:09] Speaker B: All the good times. That's a lot. I mean, I did. I did make the joke of potential additional co host Bran Morehead. And it looks like we're heading that way. [00:02:18] Speaker A: Johnny, you're almost there. You're like Steve Martin to snl. Yeah. [00:02:23] Speaker C: Or Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks. [00:02:26] Speaker A: Hanks. Thanks for listening. And if this is your first time listening, because this is a number one. So this could be a jumping on point for somebody. [00:02:32] Speaker B: Absolutely. [00:02:33] Speaker A: We are regarding Spawn, where each week we bring you two issues from Spawn's universe. Except when we don't. This is a Don't episode. [00:02:41] Speaker B: Don't do it. [00:02:42] Speaker A: Because we're doing one issue and we have a guest. We only do one issue because there's just so much fun stuff to talk about. And we are doing the 2025 miniseries. We are starting. Medieval spawn number one. [00:02:55] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. [00:02:57] Speaker A: All the way back from the far off land of. Sorry. I'M on Digital here, too. April 2025, man came out 4:20. Three came out three days after 4:20. So hopefully you were still really stoned when you read it. [00:03:12] Speaker B: Or, I mean, you know, you could just. It doesn't have to be continuous. You could just get stoned to read it again. [00:03:19] Speaker A: You would, like, get stoned. It reminds me of the video of, like, this woman. There's like, an Instagram video or TikTok, I can't remember, but she was like, me. When I sit, I have to put on something. When I eat, she, like, puts on a movie and she's, like, eating, and it gets to, like, the opening titles and it's done, and she gets up and leaves. That's how I feel. If you smoked a joint before reading this, like, smoke the joint, sit down and read it and be like, did I just read this? Yeah, done. [00:03:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:03:42] Speaker A: Like 30 seconds. [00:03:43] Speaker B: Like, it. You wouldn't. You wouldn't get a chance to get high yet. You'd be like, wait, am I high already? Did I read it? It's very quick. [00:03:50] Speaker A: Short one. [00:03:50] Speaker B: It's very quick. [00:03:51] Speaker C: Yeah, it's like. It feels like the, like, opening and then the first, like, little cold open of a, like, tutorial section of a video game and then the credits happen at the end of this issue or something, you know? [00:04:03] Speaker B: Yeah. There have definitely been cold opens of Star Trek that have lasted longer than this issue. Yeah. [00:04:11] Speaker A: But cold open. [00:04:13] Speaker B: What's. What's. What do you do much in the medieval fantasy realm there, Bran? Are you a. You a big old nerd like us? [00:04:21] Speaker C: I mean, I'm. I've played a lot. I've played a decent amount of D. D. That's not necessarily medieval fantasy, you know, it can be parts of, like, DND's world is. I guess I'm playing Baldur's Gate 3 still for like, a year and a half now. And it's. I mean, it's like medieval fantasy kind of adjacent, right? [00:04:41] Speaker A: That's. [00:04:42] Speaker C: There's castles. There's. [00:04:43] Speaker B: I say so too. [00:04:45] Speaker C: There's just a lot of, you know, there's just like also, you know, interplanar beating beings and shit. So. [00:04:52] Speaker A: Right. [00:04:53] Speaker C: DND's like calling D and D just medieval fantasy feels a little bit of a narrowing of a scope of D and D. But yeah, I mean, that. [00:05:02] Speaker A: Didn't you do, like, a crazy campaign where you were, like, going to interdimensional and fighting? [00:05:06] Speaker C: Yeah, ours was, like, not medieval fantasy at all. Fighting. What? [00:05:11] Speaker A: Pac Man? [00:05:12] Speaker C: We didn't fight Pac man, but we did fight a big pig who. Kind of a big pig cop guy who looked like Pac Man a little bit and ate the world. Yeah, that was. That was a quarantine. I was the DM for about two straight years. We met just about every Wednesday. [00:05:30] Speaker B: Nice. Eight years. That's good. That's good. [00:05:32] Speaker C: Campaign times over a video conferencing software. So Zoom doesn't give you any money. [00:05:39] Speaker A: Yes. [00:05:39] Speaker C: Yeah. And yeah. Yeah, it was. We. I didn't. It was a complete homebrew. I mean, we were using rules and classes and I would usually. If I was inventing enemies, I would usually base them off of something in the monster manual. But the campaign itself was totally homebrew and was like. Yeah. Going between. We started in like a. In inspired by super jail time, police prison. And then they went to sort of an idyllic pastoral kind of land where they ended up teaming up with a vampire to fight something else. I don't remember. [00:06:19] Speaker B: You've slept since then. [00:06:21] Speaker C: That was. Yeah. I mean, also, I think, like so many things during like the height of quarantine, it feels a little imagined. Or did it. Or like a story that I watched happen to somebody else instead of me, you know? [00:06:36] Speaker B: Yeah. Very much like this issue. Did we do that? Did that actually happen? Yeah. [00:06:42] Speaker A: Yeah. I like, can't think about Animal Crossing. [00:06:46] Speaker C: Yeah. I mean, I'll like never play that game again. [00:06:49] Speaker A: No, it's ruined for me. [00:06:50] Speaker C: It's totally. [00:06:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:06:51] Speaker A: It's been like tainted. [00:06:53] Speaker C: And that the Switch, the original Switch version of that game was like the ultimate. I don't even know what the you do to make the game better after that one. That was ultimate. Animal Crossing. It have to be. I mean, you have to add something like Roblox or you're literally building. Like you can make anything, which it's Nintendo. And that's kind of what they did for Tears of the Kingdom. So they might do that where it's like, oh, no, you can like design and 3D model. It's the kind of chair you want. And then it will exist in Animal Crossing. You can give it to your friends. Like, I could see them doing something like that. And then since it's on Nintendo hardware, it'll like chug along at 10fps, you know. [00:07:31] Speaker A: Yeah, I preferred the. The 3DS one just because, like, it felt a little more obtuse and mysterious still. Yeah, maybe I also maybe just play. [00:07:40] Speaker C: That's the one where you can go to the city. [00:07:43] Speaker A: No, that's this Wii one. [00:07:45] Speaker C: Okay. [00:07:46] Speaker A: No, wait, you go to A city. [00:07:47] Speaker C: I think you, like, go visit the. [00:07:49] Speaker A: City and show the town up top. [00:07:51] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:07:51] Speaker A: Total shops up top. Yeah. [00:07:54] Speaker C: But I think you have to like, take a bus or something. I don't know. [00:07:57] Speaker A: The 3Ds just looks good. I love the little characters in it. I mean, it looks like you're looking at a little box, which is what it is, but everything looks really good. [00:08:04] Speaker C: On 3ds is such an awesome system. No spawn games on 3ds, though. I don't believe. [00:08:10] Speaker A: No spawn games. There's a spawn game on Game Boy. On original Game Boy. [00:08:15] Speaker B: Nice. Original Game Boy. Not even Game Boy color. [00:08:20] Speaker A: Maybe it's Game Boy color. I don't remember. [00:08:22] Speaker B: Dang. [00:08:23] Speaker A: And then there's a Dreamcast game and there's that. [00:08:26] Speaker B: That PlayStation game. That was also the cabinet game. [00:08:29] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. That's also the Dreamcast. [00:08:31] Speaker B: Okay. It's the same. [00:08:33] Speaker A: Yeah. There's like three or four, but I don't believe Medieval Spawn's ever been in a video game. [00:08:39] Speaker B: No. [00:08:40] Speaker A: Maybe I'm reading digital too, David, because I forgot to pre order this and I went to go buy it on Thursday after the day came out and they were sold out. [00:08:48] Speaker B: Oh, no. [00:08:49] Speaker C: Wow. Where'd you go? [00:08:51] Speaker A: I don't actually, I. [00:08:53] Speaker C: Could you go to your normal place? The place? [00:08:55] Speaker A: Yeah. They're just sold out. Yeah. I went to Challengers. [00:08:58] Speaker B: That's wild. I could see if. I could see if my shop has an extra one if you would like. They probably still find it. [00:09:05] Speaker A: I don't think they have it in challenges. Just doesn't keep much backstock. [00:09:10] Speaker B: Yeah, no, they don't. [00:09:11] Speaker A: They keep it clean. [00:09:12] Speaker B: Which is. Which is refreshing because the typical. The typical comic book shop style is just take your life into your own hands with the perilous stacks of books. [00:09:24] Speaker C: Totally. [00:09:25] Speaker B: Like, did you ever go into that books that used books store at like Clark and what it ever. It is. [00:09:32] Speaker C: Oh, right at the. Right at the Belmont Station. [00:09:34] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:35] Speaker C: Redline station. It's still there. Yeah. That place is crazy, dude. He's such an. The guy who runs that place. [00:09:42] Speaker B: He is. But the like, I hope he doesn't listen. The shelves are held up. [00:09:44] Speaker C: But he's never been a nice. Yeah, dude, that's a. That place is. If it. If one goes, it's all going. But I love bookstores like that. [00:09:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:55] Speaker C: Went to one in Louisville, Kentucky once that was similar. It was much bigger, but it was like you could tell which side they started on. And it was like that too. A lot of like homemade shelves that Were kind of sketchy and held up by the books themselves. So you just can't sell too much or the whole building's gonna fall, you know? [00:10:11] Speaker B: Yeah, that's true. I remember one time I walked in there and there was an ash. There was a structural ashtray on the. On the amazing. On the shelves that I was like, I have to get out of this building right now. [00:10:24] Speaker C: And how long has it been since you can smoke inside in Chicago? 2010 or so. Yeah. [00:10:29] Speaker B: Oh, boy. [00:10:30] Speaker A: Yeah, I like ch. I like Myopic. Because their. Their graphic novel shelf is so heavy in the middle. [00:10:38] Speaker C: Just like bends like bows like that. Yeah, yeah. [00:10:41] Speaker A: It's just like a smiley face. [00:10:44] Speaker B: If you accidentally break the shelf, do you have to buy all of the. All of the books that fall off of it? [00:10:50] Speaker A: God, I hope not. I'll be buying a lot of old Star wars shit I sold to them. So we always start with the covers. I have the digital, so I have the A cover. [00:11:01] Speaker B: Nice. [00:11:03] Speaker A: Which is Mr. Francesco Mattina. [00:11:05] Speaker B: It's a good cover. [00:11:06] Speaker A: And it is a 3D looking badass medieval spawn on like, Mustafar or some shit. [00:11:12] Speaker B: Yeah, it's like a Mustafar on a rainy day. [00:11:17] Speaker A: Yeah, I like the green lightning. [00:11:18] Speaker B: I like the. I like the. Like the skeletal mouth just like opening behind him in the sky. [00:11:25] Speaker A: I didn't even notice that. [00:11:26] Speaker B: Yeah, it's just like. It's like he's about to get eaten by. Eaten by Bruce the shark, only it's a skeleton face. [00:11:33] Speaker A: What do you have? What cover do you have, Davis? [00:11:35] Speaker B: I have. Can you imagine, Johnny? I actually didn't get the blank cover for once because there is a blank cover. [00:11:42] Speaker A: Oh, nice. But I have the B. That's the B cover. [00:11:44] Speaker B: B cover. The. The Mattina and McFarlane cover that's black and white. And it's just Todd McFarlane Medieval Spawn there. He's looking pretty dope. Yeah, it's actually, I think it is the exact same. It's like the exact same initial pencils as the Mattina cover, just with Todd McFarlane's inking over it. If you. [00:12:09] Speaker A: Oh, I got it. Okay. Yeah, yeah. [00:12:11] Speaker B: So it's got no background, but it's got all the little bitty, like, little tiny lines and ink splatters that we like from the Todd father. [00:12:20] Speaker A: What are your medieval bona fides, David? I don't even know me. [00:12:24] Speaker B: Oh, boy. Well, I can't spell the name. [00:12:27] Speaker A: I can't either. [00:12:30] Speaker B: I. I mean, I am kind of a nerd, right? Like, I like the Lord of the Rings shit. I like, I got really into the Wheel of Time until I got busy and then could no longer read four inch thick books. [00:12:48] Speaker A: Okay. [00:12:49] Speaker C: The Doorstop edition. [00:12:51] Speaker B: Yeah. Or anything. Brandon Sanderson. I like Brandon Sanderson, but I, I have no idea how he has the time to write them because I ain't got the time to read them. I've recently begun reading a book series about a medieval monk who solves crimes. So that's, that's pretty awesome. [00:13:09] Speaker A: Okay. Sounds like a BBC show. [00:13:11] Speaker B: And I mean they made a BBC show out of it in the, in the early 90s. [00:13:18] Speaker A: My dad, I just went back to Tulsa. My dad's obsessed with this BBC so called doc Martin. It's just like this like on the spectrum doctor that was into Adventures in a Small Town. [00:13:29] Speaker B: That was like a just pre Monk show. Right. Or was it just. I think so Monk. [00:13:34] Speaker A: Because it's very monk adjacent. [00:13:36] Speaker B: Yeah, I like that. [00:13:39] Speaker A: Okay. Well that's a medieval, so that's pretty good. [00:13:41] Speaker B: Yeah. I like, I like it. I don't. I don't obsess over it. I like the, the anachronistic medieval stuff more than the real medieval stuff because that's kind of icky when you start looking into it like the Crusades and whatnot. No, no, thank you. [00:13:56] Speaker A: I, I mean me, I've read. I read the first three, whatever the series is called. The Game of Thrones series. What is that? Ice and winter. [00:14:09] Speaker B: Fire. [00:14:09] Speaker C: Fire song. [00:14:10] Speaker A: Fire and ice. Yeah, there it is. [00:14:11] Speaker C: Sonic. Yeah. Fire and Ice. [00:14:13] Speaker A: A song of fire and Ice. I've read the first three of those. I really like army of Darkness is movie. [00:14:21] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:22] Speaker A: But I can't say. And I like Lord of the Rings. I like the movies more than the books. I'm more, I'm. I'm more loyal to the movies, I guess you could say. [00:14:32] Speaker B: I prefer. [00:14:32] Speaker A: I do like the Hobbit book a lot. The Hobbit's a good book. But it was never. I don't know, it was always like. It's always more sci fi leaning. [00:14:43] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:45] Speaker A: Than I was medieval. [00:14:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:14:47] Speaker A: That kind of stuff. [00:14:48] Speaker B: I also think. I also think we grew up at a time where like just the strict medieval fantasy was. People were getting tired of it. So they were mixing fantastical elements in more and more frequently. So that's just kind of the soup we were raised in. [00:15:03] Speaker A: Right. We were too. Too young for he man, which has a lot of high fantasy elements. [00:15:09] Speaker B: He man. [00:15:12] Speaker A: Too young. [00:15:13] Speaker B: Yeah, too young. But you know, Xena was also good sort of. That's I guess pre medieval. That's ancient. [00:15:22] Speaker A: Yeah, I would consider. Yeah, it seems like it's. [00:15:25] Speaker B: It's a fantasy series. [00:15:26] Speaker A: It's a fantasy series. [00:15:28] Speaker C: Yeah. It's a little more like. What is it called? Swords and Sandals. [00:15:31] Speaker B: Yes. Yeah. Like Red Sonja and Conan. [00:15:35] Speaker C: Conan. [00:15:36] Speaker B: Conan. [00:15:37] Speaker C: Soon to be another major motion picture, I guess. Red Sonia. [00:15:43] Speaker B: Yeah, it's getting mixed reviews, as you can imagine, from a Red Sonja film. But I think. I think. [00:15:50] Speaker C: I don't think the first one got good reviews, did it? [00:15:54] Speaker B: No, I think the first one just has, like, that cult following. [00:15:58] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:15:59] Speaker B: Of people playing Red Sonja in this. [00:16:01] Speaker C: Oh, I don't remember. [00:16:02] Speaker A: Probably no clue. [00:16:03] Speaker C: Somebody I've never heard of before. Yeah, she probably, like, was in a GEICO commercial first or something. [00:16:10] Speaker B: Yeah, either that or she, like, came up, like, the Fightings. [00:16:14] Speaker C: It's going to be somebody we all know now that I'm talking. [00:16:16] Speaker A: Sydney Sweeney. [00:16:20] Speaker C: Matilda Lutz. What a name. What a name. Italian actress and model. [00:16:27] Speaker A: Okay. [00:16:30] Speaker B: Nice. [00:16:30] Speaker A: Well, if we're talking names, we got names in the credits here. [00:16:34] Speaker B: That's true. [00:16:35] Speaker A: Pop the sucker open or swipe if you're me. Because I'm reading on digital script plot by Rory McConville. We love Rory McConville. [00:16:44] Speaker B: Yeah, we do. [00:16:47] Speaker A: They're currently on Kingspawn. And now they're also on this art by Marco Itry Eatery. Hopefully I'm pronouncing that right. [00:17:00] Speaker B: Hopefully. [00:17:00] Speaker C: Eitri. Sounds right to me. [00:17:02] Speaker A: Etri. Color by Ulysses Areola. Lettering by an world design. We already covered the covers. [00:17:08] Speaker B: Sure did. [00:17:08] Speaker A: Creative director is one Mr. Todd McFarlane. And editor in chief is Seth MacFarlane. Oh, no. Thomas Healy. Editor Thomas Healy. [00:17:20] Speaker B: I wondered why there was that weird. Just like, break away to a non sequitur in the middle of this issue. [00:17:27] Speaker A: A chicken. [00:17:29] Speaker B: This chicken fight lasts for four pages. [00:17:31] Speaker A: Oh, boy. Nothing like a. Nothing like a guy circa 2006 that loved family Guy. [00:17:38] Speaker B: Hey, Johnny, guess what? I was. I was a guy circa 2006 who loved family Guy. [00:17:43] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:17:45] Speaker B: Could you imagine? [00:17:46] Speaker A: I can imagine. I bet you were going, hey, Peter all the time. [00:17:52] Speaker C: Oh, man, I was quoting that show a lot in 2006 also. [00:17:56] Speaker A: That's true. Everyone kind of. [00:17:57] Speaker C: I was never one that thought like, oh, man, the chicken fight. That's so great. Like, I feel like that was the worst kind of. Those guys were just like, oh, the big chicken. [00:18:06] Speaker B: Yeah, I was. I was a Brian man. You know, erudite dog. Of course. That's me. [00:18:13] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:18:17] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, it was just. It was ever present. It was. It was that time when they were putting the reruns on Adult Swim and adults. [00:18:22] Speaker C: Right. [00:18:23] Speaker B: But. [00:18:23] Speaker C: Yeah, and right before Fox, like, renewed the show because it did so well on Adult Swim. [00:18:28] Speaker A: Yeah, but like, like, literally, I lived in the dorms at that time, and you just come into the comic. [00:18:31] Speaker C: Oh, my God. [00:18:32] Speaker A: And from like, hey, Peter. 10 to 2am Someone would just be watching Adult Swim in the lobby. [00:18:38] Speaker B: I hate. I hate. Peter's way better than somebody trying to be Quagmire. We don't need any giggies. [00:18:43] Speaker C: Yeah. Oh, God. [00:18:44] Speaker A: Quagmire's canceled. Shocking. No, right? [00:18:49] Speaker B: Rightly so. [00:18:49] Speaker C: Yeah. I mean, he wasn't like. I don't know. That's not like he was a good person in the show. [00:18:55] Speaker B: Yeah, it's. It's. It's like he was a bad take on Boomhauer. They were like, boomhauer is inclusive. How can we make him bad? I love Boomhauer. [00:19:04] Speaker C: Yeah. Boomhauer's awesome, though. Boomers. Boomhauer is horny, though. Boom. Howard does get some. [00:19:12] Speaker B: Oh, man, that's. Yeah. You know who's not getting any? [00:19:17] Speaker A: This kid. [00:19:18] Speaker B: This frozen kid in the middle of the world. [00:19:20] Speaker C: Frozen kid's definitely not getting any. [00:19:21] Speaker A: It's England. It's 1443. [00:19:23] Speaker B: Well, he's also a sheepherder, so, you know, that's the only. That's the only getting he's getting. [00:19:28] Speaker A: Are you saying he's tupping the white ewe, David? [00:19:31] Speaker B: Yeah, well, not currently, because they all ran away, which is why he's lost. [00:19:37] Speaker A: It's true. [00:19:38] Speaker B: But, yeah, we got this. Lost Shepherd, England, 1443. And there's this kid just sitting in the. Sitting in the woods, and we get a Medieval spawn voiceover saying that this kid's name is Richard. And they stumbled on him by chance because one of Medieval's crew, Cuthbert, saw him from a distance and was like, let's go check out that dot over there, that little guy. And then they find him, and Medieval's like, we shouldn't have found him. We should have left that boy alone. [00:20:09] Speaker C: Only there's a lot I feel like in this. This issue. Medieval Spawn five different times is like, if only I'd known. I never would have done that. [00:20:18] Speaker A: Yep. [00:20:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:20:21] Speaker C: Classic. Classic thing to say in the Medieval times. [00:20:24] Speaker B: Like, yeah. [00:20:25] Speaker C: Whether it's like going to a village that had bubonic plague or, oh, I don't know, pissing off the Visigoths. [00:20:33] Speaker B: Speaking. Speaking of Medieval Times, Johnny, we should go to Medieval Times before you leave. [00:20:38] Speaker A: I've been in Medieval Times. [00:20:39] Speaker B: I've never been to Medieval Times. [00:20:40] Speaker A: Really? [00:20:41] Speaker B: Yeah. It's never been. [00:20:45] Speaker A: It's. The chicken was pretty good. The biscuit was good. The soup was good. [00:20:48] Speaker B: I have been to the Christmas version of the Dixie Stampede before, though, which is the Civil War version. [00:20:55] Speaker C: It now has a different name. [00:20:56] Speaker B: I think it's just called Stampede. [00:20:58] Speaker C: Stampede. [00:20:59] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:00] Speaker A: I like it when it's the Dixie. They just take it away. They come up with something else with, like, the Dixie Chicks. Chicks. [00:21:05] Speaker B: Chicks. [00:21:06] Speaker C: The Chicks. Yeah. They just take. Yeah, good point. [00:21:09] Speaker A: Why don't you add something? [00:21:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:12] Speaker A: Like, just. It's just called Stampede. [00:21:15] Speaker B: I think it. I think it's just called. I think. I think it's Dolly Parton's Stampede. [00:21:19] Speaker C: Okay. I mean, that's. Okay. [00:21:20] Speaker A: She's got her name on it. That's good. [00:21:22] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:21:23] Speaker A: It's like Tim Burton's Night Before Christmas. [00:21:26] Speaker B: She did. She didn't direct it, but she. She did everything but basically correct. [00:21:30] Speaker A: Henry Selleck's piss. Henry Selleck directed Dixie Sambi. [00:21:36] Speaker B: Oh, boy. [00:21:37] Speaker A: But, yeah, this kid, he's got a cool, like, mohawk. [00:21:40] Speaker B: Yeah. Speaking of Visigoths, Is that. [00:21:44] Speaker C: I was thinking, is that Mohawk? Does somebody does that? Is there a, like, prevalent character in other Spawns that has a mohawk that maybe he's gonna turn out to be or something? [00:21:55] Speaker B: Not currently. That I know of. [00:21:56] Speaker A: Not currently. He might be. He might be some old villain from, like, a medieval Spawn we haven't read. Because there are a couple of other series. [00:22:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, there's an original series. [00:22:09] Speaker C: New Medieval Stones. [00:22:10] Speaker B: Yes. [00:22:11] Speaker A: Yes. [00:22:11] Speaker C: This just was an original in the 90s. Got it. There was a. I didn't know if there was a one before this at all. [00:22:17] Speaker A: Yeah, there was Spawn, the Dark Ages, and then there was a couple miniseries. There's one where he teamed up with Witchblade. [00:22:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:26] Speaker C: And Medieval Spawn showed up in King Spawn in an episode. In an issue or two we read. Right. [00:22:31] Speaker A: Yeah. Or something we read. [00:22:33] Speaker C: Yeah, something we read. He was like, there. [00:22:35] Speaker A: He's always popping in and out, like, in the current. [00:22:38] Speaker C: Came in out of the. Out of the ether and was like, blah, blah, blah, and, like, killed some dudes and then left. Or I was. Because Kingspawn has all the. Like, the team, Right? That's the one. [00:22:49] Speaker B: Scorched is the team. [00:22:50] Speaker C: Scorched has the team. Maybe it's him. Maybe it's in Scorched. Then he's one of them. I remember having a blue ass armor. [00:22:58] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:58] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. He's blue. [00:22:59] Speaker B: He's blue. Oh, also, we forgot to. We forgot to mention Medieval Spawn created by the world's most unproblematic author. [00:23:06] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Neil Gaiman. [00:23:08] Speaker B: Neil Gaiman. Oh, boy. Hide your. Hide your babysitters. Jesus Christ. [00:23:15] Speaker C: Hide your kids. Hide your wife. [00:23:17] Speaker A: Details. But you know what? I'm on the right side of history. I never liked that anyway. [00:23:26] Speaker C: Wow. [00:23:27] Speaker A: No, I did. I like the Norse mythology. [00:23:29] Speaker C: Norse mythology is incredible. Yeah, we read that together. [00:23:32] Speaker A: I like the movie Stardust. [00:23:34] Speaker B: The. The book was really good, too. But, yeah, the movie was fun. [00:23:38] Speaker A: The Branhams are big fans of Stardust. I think they showed me Stardust. [00:23:42] Speaker B: That's because I got the. It's got the. Robert, Nero and Dragon. [00:23:46] Speaker A: Yeah, they love it. [00:23:46] Speaker C: He's a drag in that movie. Now I'm a fan. [00:23:49] Speaker B: Yeah, he's a. He's a. He's a pirate who's secretly into drag. And then his secret gets exposed and they're like, you should just fucking do this all the time, dude. It's fun. [00:24:00] Speaker C: I love that. [00:24:02] Speaker A: Yeah. Medieval spawn created by an evil spawn. [00:24:06] Speaker C: An evil spawn. Wow. Cuthbert. I was going to mention that because, first of all, good name. But it makes me obviously think of the Dark Tower. [00:24:22] Speaker B: Yes. [00:24:22] Speaker C: Stephen King. We were talking about some other Stephen King before we started recording here, but we had. [00:24:28] Speaker B: We actually had. [00:24:29] Speaker C: He's. He's what? He's Roland's, like, mentor guy, right? From the. [00:24:34] Speaker A: Cuthbert and Elaine. Aren't those his friends? [00:24:36] Speaker B: Yeah, they're. Maybe it was like his. His posse that. [00:24:40] Speaker C: Yeah, it's like his friend. That's what it is. [00:24:42] Speaker B: Yeah. They. They grow up and get in trouble together and then go off on their adventure. [00:24:47] Speaker C: Yes. [00:24:47] Speaker A: And they die. They're both. [00:24:49] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:49] Speaker C: Yes, they do. [00:24:50] Speaker A: The book starts. [00:24:51] Speaker B: Spoilers. God damn. [00:24:52] Speaker A: For a Dark. That's like Dark Tower One. [00:24:55] Speaker C: It's 20 years ago. Is it? In their first one, it might be Dark Tower One's 50 years ago, then. [00:25:01] Speaker B: Jesus. [00:25:02] Speaker A: He's, like, looking for. Well, he mentions them that they're dead in the first one, and then. [00:25:05] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:25:07] Speaker B: I don't. [00:25:07] Speaker C: You learn about them in the. In wizard and Glass. In the flashback, of course. [00:25:11] Speaker B: Washimi, man. [00:25:14] Speaker C: Wow. [00:25:14] Speaker B: Yes. [00:25:15] Speaker A: A magical. A magical person with a disability. Stephen King loves. [00:25:21] Speaker C: Yeah, he sure does. [00:25:23] Speaker A: He sure does. [00:25:24] Speaker B: You got Susanna Deda. [00:25:26] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, yeah. [00:25:28] Speaker C: He's got Powder Odetta. Yeah. [00:25:30] Speaker B: Oh, man. Fucking love Deda. I love that. [00:25:33] Speaker C: You got the guy from. I'm Todd Boss. The guy from A Green Mile. [00:25:38] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:25:40] Speaker A: John. John Cotton, something like that. [00:25:43] Speaker C: Is that his name? [00:25:45] Speaker A: I hope not. I hope not. But yeah. Yeah, Cuthbert. Definitely a good medieval name. I'm gonna assume it's A reference to that. [00:25:58] Speaker B: I would assume so too. [00:25:59] Speaker A: I wonder if it's one of those names. It's in the original Dark Tower poem that he based it off of. Kind of. [00:26:05] Speaker B: Maybe it doesn't. [00:26:08] Speaker C: I don't know. [00:26:08] Speaker B: It is also like an old timey sound to name. You don't meet anybody named Cuthbert these days? [00:26:13] Speaker A: Not really. [00:26:14] Speaker C: No. You shouldn't. [00:26:17] Speaker B: I mean. [00:26:17] Speaker C: No, you don't. You should is actually what I was gonna say. Be a sick name. But what's like your nickname? Bert, I guess. [00:26:24] Speaker B: Bert. Hey, hey, Bert. Hey, hey, Bert. Maybe it would be hilarious if. If Bert. Bert of Bert and Ernie fame, where his full name was Cuthbert and they just shortened it to Bert. [00:26:37] Speaker C: Yeah, Bert from Burton. Ernie. That would be awesome if that's his full name. [00:26:42] Speaker A: So Richard here, the kid is the show's sheep that David thinks he. [00:26:49] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, it's cold out there, Johnny, and he's all by himself. [00:26:54] Speaker A: He could taunt on them. He just cut one open. Yeah, he could do it. [00:26:57] Speaker B: I thought they smelled bad on the outside. So. Yeah, he's telling the story about how, you know, he was gone away from his village looking for some lost sheep. And then when he came back after finding said sheep, his village was just like destroyed, Just overrun with demons. [00:27:17] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:27:18] Speaker B: And so he just ran. He was like, I'm gonna go to the nearest village, which is still very far away. [00:27:24] Speaker A: This whole issue just reminds me of like a diablo side quest. Like you find a boy in the woods, 100, he's like, go to my village. It's covered in demons. You go there amulet. [00:27:34] Speaker C: Oh look, there's a bunch of zombies. Yeah, exactly, dude. It is just a diablo side quest. [00:27:39] Speaker B: Yeah. And then based on. Based on Richard's story. Cup birth is like. It's Fitzroy. It's gotta be. He's this evil wizard that we've been following. It's got to be the evil wizard. [00:27:51] Speaker A: He goes to a place called the Black Vault. [00:27:56] Speaker B: That's definitely not a. Not a Diablo site at all. No, not at all. [00:28:00] Speaker A: Yeah, there's Lilith over there. I finally did it, David. I bit the bull and I pre ordered that Lilith figure. [00:28:05] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. [00:28:06] Speaker C: Oh, wow. Is there like a big new one nice one coming out? [00:28:10] Speaker A: Yeah, there's like a nice. It's like it's only 60 bucks, but it's pretty cool. [00:28:14] Speaker C: Oh, that's not too. [00:28:15] Speaker A: Not bad. [00:28:16] Speaker B: Not bad at all. [00:28:17] Speaker A: I don't have any of the other ones because like they're just kind of generic like characters. [00:28:21] Speaker C: But I was like, yeah, some guy with a Sword and a shield. [00:28:25] Speaker A: Right. Like, none of them look like my characters, so I don't want them. [00:28:28] Speaker C: Totally. [00:28:29] Speaker B: That's the next frontier, Johnny, is they'll let you customize your action figure to be exactly like your avatar and it'll be 400. [00:28:38] Speaker C: Oh, I mean, I'm sure you could do that right now if you want. [00:28:41] Speaker A: That probably exists. Probably mine would be too horny. I always. My philosophy is, I don't. If I don't want to have sex with my Diablo character, I'm not playing as him. [00:28:50] Speaker C: Then you're not going to play it. [00:28:53] Speaker A: Gotta have some eye candy, David. [00:28:55] Speaker B: It's true. [00:28:56] Speaker C: So you're saying Balder's gay character that way? [00:28:59] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. [00:29:00] Speaker B: Yeah. You've got that. That behind that third person view, so that way you can see the. The Booty Bounce. [00:29:08] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:29:08] Speaker C: Well, Diablo, you're just like an isometric, like, above. You're just like a little. [00:29:12] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, okay. [00:29:13] Speaker C: That's guy running around. [00:29:14] Speaker A: But if you go to the menu, it's really close up and you can, like, zoom in. [00:29:17] Speaker C: Yeah, there you go. [00:29:20] Speaker B: And you call me out for being naughty. Tsk, tsk. John. So. So. So Medieval Spawns basically just like, we gotta go, let's ride. And so they ride to the Void's village. [00:29:36] Speaker A: Awesome little panel there of them riding. [00:29:38] Speaker B: Yeah. And Richard's like, so who's your. Who's your lord? [00:29:43] Speaker C: The one at the top here. [00:29:45] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:45] Speaker C: I was just thinking about how, like, Spawn Source especially looks just like. They're like beefcake horses. They look like they're getting. They're just huge. Like, look at this. Look at the size of that one's on the right's head is, like, so huge. It's like a linebacker. [00:29:58] Speaker B: Yeah, they're, like, beefy. There's. There's like, no elegance. They're just like, all muscle. [00:30:03] Speaker C: No, the Budweiser Clydesdale posse. [00:30:08] Speaker B: Yeah. Yep. And Richard asks who Medieval's lord is, and he's like, yeah, no, I ain't got one. Because, you know, we know. We know that. We know that he served the Malbolia, but, you know, left. Although this is. Where does this fit? Because I remember in issue nine, when we meet Medieval Spawn, we meet him for three seconds, and then he tries to help Angela and she's just like, whoop, you're dead. [00:30:39] Speaker A: So, yeah, I mean, I don't think any of that shit counts anymore. [00:30:45] Speaker B: I don't think it does either. [00:30:46] Speaker C: I'm sure you nine of the original series. [00:30:48] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. That's what. [00:30:49] Speaker C: He shows up early Crazy. [00:30:51] Speaker A: He was one of the first toys too. [00:30:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:56] Speaker A: It was. It was really cool. There's so much promise in those early spawns. You think there's just to be like tons of spawns and then they don't do it for 20 years. [00:31:03] Speaker C: But there are tons of spawns now. [00:31:05] Speaker A: Now there are. Yeah. But in the original run, they like don't do it. [00:31:09] Speaker C: Sort of tease a bunch and it doesn't really ever pay off. Cool. [00:31:12] Speaker A: Yeah, it's interesting. [00:31:13] Speaker B: Yeah. So, yeah, they. They arrive at Richard's village and Cuthbert's there. Like, good God. And then we see what they're looking at and it's just like. Oh, like, it's just like viscera is covering the whole village. [00:31:30] Speaker A: Well, even this is a video game level, so it's like you got to cut down all the. [00:31:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:31:34] Speaker A: All the sinewy stuff. [00:31:36] Speaker B: Like, like I destroy the rot. It's pulsing. [00:31:39] Speaker C: Yeah, it's the like Elder Scrolls oblivion, like goop. [00:31:45] Speaker A: I only played. I played like 50 hours that on Switch and never played more. But it was, it was fun. [00:31:51] Speaker C: Played it on my roommate's Xbox360 because I did not have one. [00:31:55] Speaker B: Nice. [00:31:57] Speaker A: Nice. [00:31:57] Speaker B: Medieval's like, well, I guess we got to see what's going on here. So let's go on it, everybody. And he's like, Richard, you stay here and watch the horses. So they, they start. They start, you know, doing some recon and then. And then I don't know who it is, what his name is, but he's like, he smelled. And we get the. The opening reading by a member of the team. [00:32:25] Speaker A: You smell that, Cuthbert? It's the devil's piss, he says. [00:32:31] Speaker B: And then, you know, gets attacked by this. This weird. [00:32:33] Speaker C: I love the reflection of the little ghost in his sword there, though. I do like that little detail. There's a little like Halloween spirit. Halloween looking ass ghost in his. [00:32:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:45] Speaker C: Sword. [00:32:46] Speaker B: Yeah, it's a good one. As these. These weird meaty skeletons are terrifying. It just, just goes right into this to this poor dude named Sherman. His name's Sherman. Just disembowels him immediately. [00:33:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:33:05] Speaker C: Sherm. [00:33:06] Speaker B: Sherm. [00:33:07] Speaker A: Then medieval spawn starts hacking heads off. [00:33:10] Speaker B: And then just, you know, they start coming out of the woodworks and Medieval's like, you know, Richard said there were about 200 people in this village. So we've got like 199 more of these to kill. So. Dang. [00:33:25] Speaker A: I just watched the Clone wars episode with Bad Batch. This reminds me of that. [00:33:29] Speaker B: Oh, nice. [00:33:30] Speaker A: They wipe out that whole squad of battle droids. [00:33:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:33:32] Speaker A: With their EMPs. [00:33:34] Speaker B: Bad Batch is great. They're the bad batch. [00:33:38] Speaker A: Yeah. Those. Those last two seasons of Clone wars actually good people, right? [00:33:42] Speaker B: They rip the first five. There's a lot of filler in this. [00:33:46] Speaker C: The movie, terrible. [00:33:48] Speaker A: The movie is awful. Senator. [00:33:50] Speaker C: Not Attack of the Clones, to be clear. The Clone wars movie that starts the series. Yeah, you watched it with me. Yeah, we watched it. [00:34:00] Speaker A: I ever ordered on Netflix in the mail. Was that because I hadn't seen it and I, like, felt guilty that hadn't seen a Star wars movie, so I got it in the mail on Netflix and we watched in my old apartment. We were like, this is dog. [00:34:10] Speaker C: This is horrible. Yeah, it was horrible. Does it start before or after the Lindsey Graham figure? Cousin. [00:34:18] Speaker A: Oh, the Jabba cousin. [00:34:21] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:34:21] Speaker A: Oh, Sanada. [00:34:22] Speaker C: Lindsey Graham style Senator. [00:34:24] Speaker A: Yeah. Oh, my God. Does it start before or after What? David. [00:34:29] Speaker B: So the Clone wars series starts with Yoda going to visit Boss Nast, and they basically do another pod race. Does it start before or after that? [00:34:37] Speaker A: Before. It's just the first three episodes of the series strung together. [00:34:40] Speaker B: Okay. [00:34:40] Speaker A: And they released it in theaters. [00:34:42] Speaker B: Oh, boy. No. [00:34:44] Speaker A: Yeah, those first four episodes. It's the pilot, basically. Yeah. It's rough, but yeah, the later season's pretty good, but there's a big fight like this. The bad batch. But this is. Yeah. Diablo time. They're just killing hordes of enemies. Yeah, they're live streaming this. [00:35:03] Speaker B: Yeah, they're Leroy Jenkinsing all over the place. [00:35:07] Speaker C: Fitzroy. Fitzroy Jenkins. [00:35:10] Speaker A: Fitzroy Jenkins. Oh, man, what an innocent time. [00:35:16] Speaker B: I like. [00:35:16] Speaker C: Wow. [00:35:16] Speaker B: I like that Medieval busts out his. Like his. His super power skill by just like, slamming his sword into the ground. And it. It's like a mega skill. [00:35:27] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:27] Speaker B: A lot of them around him. [00:35:29] Speaker A: His finisher. [00:35:30] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. With like, the wind and stuff. I think he should have an ax also. Does he later, Maybe he switches Normal Spawn has a big old battle ax a lot of times. [00:35:42] Speaker B: No, Medieval has a big axe too, so. [00:35:45] Speaker C: Yeah, okay. [00:35:45] Speaker B: He's got a. He's got like a. Now he also has like a gigantic hammer. So. [00:35:51] Speaker A: Yeah, the last toy came with the ax and hammer, so that's usually what he's drawn with. [00:35:55] Speaker C: Love a warhammer. [00:35:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:58] Speaker C: You know. Hey, look here. Reminds me that I still have knit to play Doom the Dark Ages, which I know. You know, the Doom guy, very Spawn coded, I would say. They've got like, the same neck size. [00:36:12] Speaker A: Yeah. And, like, some of the demons in the first game look like the Violator kind of like. [00:36:16] Speaker C: Yeah, totally. [00:36:17] Speaker B: I mean, the. The original Doom Guys were just nerds. So. [00:36:22] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, it's all that 90s like, hell, like, edgy. [00:36:25] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:36:26] Speaker A: They came around the same time, so. [00:36:27] Speaker C: Like, you know, like, making fun of the Satanic panic by completely leaning into it. Kind of a thing that was born out of the late 80s, you know? [00:36:36] Speaker A: Right. [00:36:36] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:38] Speaker A: Yeah. Do the Dark Ages looks sweet. I love those first. [00:36:40] Speaker C: It looks sick. I love those first two. Doom Eternal is incredible. It's so hard, but it's so good. [00:36:46] Speaker A: Maybe I'll shift to that. I forgot about that. I forgot that even came out. [00:36:50] Speaker C: I know. I kind of keep forgetting about it too. I might. I might play that too. I. I said I downloaded the sequel to Hollow Knight last night when I go, hell yeah. Work Hollow Knight. This Hollow Knight Silk song. Because it came out finally after, like. It's like one of the most anticipated indie games of all time. And it crashed Steam servers yesterday when it was released, and it crashed the Nintendo eShop. And Game Pass was having a lot of issues because it was immediately on Game Pass as well. [00:37:15] Speaker B: So, I mean, people have been waiting like a decade, right? [00:37:19] Speaker C: About six years. It's about six years. And they. And like, Game Pass or not Game Pass, the Steam store, it had like 150,000 consec or like, concurrent players on Steam, which is. [00:37:33] Speaker B: Jesus. [00:37:34] Speaker C: Just unheard of, especially for. And it's 20 bucks. Get it. It's a wonderful game. The first one's so good. That's great. [00:37:40] Speaker A: Yeah, it's. It's. I know. It's beloved. And it's. It's like a Metroidvania, right? [00:37:46] Speaker C: Or like a rock. Yeah, it's like a hard Metroidvania somewhere between, like, a soulsborne type game and a Metroidvania where, you know, you gotta, like, go back to where you died to get your stuff and that kind of a thing. [00:38:00] Speaker A: Okay. [00:38:00] Speaker C: It's just very difficult, but it's very good. [00:38:03] Speaker B: Nice. I would be terrible at it. [00:38:06] Speaker C: Well, you know, our strengths lie in different places sometimes, David. [00:38:11] Speaker B: Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. You know what I'm good at, though? Sitting there and watching somebody play a video game. [00:38:17] Speaker A: I was gonna say Wii Sports. [00:38:19] Speaker B: That was my. Oh, no. Bad at Wii Sports. But no, I. I watched my sister and our neighbors played Nintendo growing up, and I wasn't allowed to play because there were too many of us who wanted to play, and I was bad at it, so I wasn't allowed. So I just watched. [00:38:36] Speaker A: Well, then that's not. It's not like you're gonna get Any better if you're not allowed to play? Yes. [00:38:40] Speaker C: That's some flawed logics. But parents or siblings or whoever was. [00:38:44] Speaker B: It obviously was a person like me who invented Twitch, who was just like, you know. You know what we're good at? Watching other people do stuff. [00:38:51] Speaker A: What was your favorite video game to watch, David? [00:38:53] Speaker B: I loved watching Acra the Acrobat, but they didn't play that one very. [00:38:57] Speaker C: Wow. [00:39:00] Speaker A: Bubsy. [00:39:01] Speaker C: What a. No kidding. Gex the Gecko. Who are some other. [00:39:06] Speaker A: There's a raccoon platform. [00:39:08] Speaker C: There's definitely not Sly Cooper. That's more of a like. Or is that who you're thinking? [00:39:14] Speaker A: No, there was one on snes. It was just like. It was like Rocky the Raccoon. I remember ones. There were so many. [00:39:18] Speaker C: Or like, there's like 25 caveman themed ones. [00:39:23] Speaker A: Oh yeah, Like Joe and Mac. I had Joe and Mac. [00:39:25] Speaker C: Joe and Mac. Pretty fun. [00:39:28] Speaker A: I always liked Bubs. [00:39:29] Speaker C: They didn't really make it to the 3D world though. [00:39:31] Speaker A: No, they didn't. [00:39:32] Speaker C: I like to ramp Bubsy and then get really frustrated by like the second day of the rental period. [00:39:37] Speaker A: Yeah, there's nothing worse than those, like, side scrollers that were just impossible to play. [00:39:40] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:41] Speaker A: And you rent it. [00:39:41] Speaker C: You'd be like, so hard. [00:39:42] Speaker A: I can't get past the second level. Yeah. [00:39:45] Speaker C: Or like, I mean, the. The biggest one that comes to mind there is Lion King and Aladdin games. [00:39:53] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:39:53] Speaker C: So hard. The carpet level on Aladdin was like, just unbelievably difficult. [00:40:00] Speaker A: Like School of Battle. [00:40:01] Speaker C: Super Metroid and could not beat that. Yeah. [00:40:04] Speaker B: School. [00:40:04] Speaker C: Absolutely. Battletoads Esque. [00:40:06] Speaker B: Oh man. Battletoads. [00:40:07] Speaker A: Battles is just mean. [00:40:08] Speaker B: Yeah, it is. Yeah, it's. It's rude, crude, and tacky too. So it's right up our alley. [00:40:14] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:15] Speaker B: But so. So Medieval finally finds Fitzroy. [00:40:19] Speaker A: He's literally making a Diablo portal. That's exactly what the plan is. [00:40:22] Speaker B: Making a portal. And so Medieval just like sneaks up on him and tries to get the drop on him. But Fitzroy is like, haha. I know you're there. [00:40:33] Speaker C: Got a shield. A FAZAP shield. [00:40:35] Speaker B: Pizzazam. And. And we learned that Fitzroy is just fucking insane. He's like. Not too terribly long ago, he started hearing the voices of everybody he's ever killed just screaming in his head all the time. And then he found out. [00:40:53] Speaker A: Flashback. He's like some badass assassin, like all black armor. [00:40:57] Speaker B: He's just. He's like a. He's like a Hessian soldier. Johnny. You chop his head off and you got yourself a medieval Headless Horseman. Mm. And, I mean, he worked for the king. He was an assassin for the king. And, you know, so since these screams have started, he discovered that there's a. Like a. An ancient God named Abraxas who promises to return. Return his head to silence. And all those he killed back to life. He just has to free him from the. From a dimensional prison. And medieval Spawn's like. You do realize you're an idiot for believing that, right? I'm not gonna. That's not gonna. That's not gonna go your way. [00:41:41] Speaker A: And then, like, he uses some kind of crazy demon power to turn his sword into, like, a flesh, like, David Cronenberg sword. [00:41:48] Speaker B: Yeah, it's like. It's literally like the existence pistol that has a foreskin. [00:41:54] Speaker A: Mm. [00:41:54] Speaker B: This. This sword probably has a foreskin, Johnny. Let's ask David Cronenberg. [00:42:00] Speaker C: Yeah, it's gross. [00:42:02] Speaker A: He's got a new movie that just came out I wanted to see. [00:42:07] Speaker C: The one about the, like, the shrouds. [00:42:09] Speaker A: The one about viewing of the dead bodies. Like. [00:42:11] Speaker C: Yeah, I think it's called, like, the Shroud. [00:42:12] Speaker A: The Shroud, yes. Yeah, looks cool. [00:42:15] Speaker B: I gotta see that. Gotta see that. Gotta see Toxic Avenger. [00:42:19] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, yeah, dude, Toxic Avenger. [00:42:21] Speaker B: Gotta see. [00:42:21] Speaker A: Tom saw it, but he didn't say anything about it, so maybe he didn't like it. [00:42:24] Speaker C: I don't know. [00:42:26] Speaker B: Not enough Shrek, apparently. [00:42:27] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. Text him on our. On our thread so I can hear the. Hear the news, hear the review. Here's a question. Is Abraxas a name that frequent Spawn readers would be familiar with? Is this a, like, known, I'm assuming, cosmic entity in the Spawn world? [00:42:44] Speaker B: I'm assuming it's. It's relying largely on the. The concept of Abraxas the demon or the entity. [00:42:53] Speaker A: Was that a real demon? [00:42:54] Speaker B: I think so. [00:42:54] Speaker C: I think it might be a real demon. [00:42:56] Speaker B: I know it's a real Santana album. [00:42:59] Speaker C: Oh, okay. [00:43:01] Speaker B: So maybe. Maybe that's what it is. [00:43:03] Speaker A: As far as we know. No, and I don't think so. I don't think. I think it's new. [00:43:09] Speaker C: There's an Abraxas bioscience. [00:43:11] Speaker B: It's. It's term for the great archon and gnostic Christianity. So I guess if you're familiar with Gnosticism. [00:43:19] Speaker C: Okay. I can refer to a figure from Gnosticism, an optional boss in the video game Darksiders 3, a powerful, complex deity. [00:43:28] Speaker B: Often described as a God above God, who embodies the supreme universal creative force. [00:43:34] Speaker C: So a side project of electronic music artists seven Lions and demi bo. [00:43:39] Speaker A: I think that's what it is. It's a giant. [00:43:41] Speaker C: That's probably what it is. It's a. Yeah, it's a side project of something. I was like, no, I'll set you free if you listen to my side projects. [00:43:48] Speaker B: It's the. It's the Prague. The prog rock hole he's about to fall into. [00:43:53] Speaker C: Yeah. It's not a Diablo 3 portal that he made. It's a big, like, you know, 12 inch LP. Yeah, it's a record he's gonna read. [00:44:03] Speaker B: But it's a gold record, like what they put on Voyager. So. So Medieval starts trying to beat some sense into Fitzroy. Doesn't do very good because Fitzroy keeps hitting him with that magic. That magic zappy zap. [00:44:18] Speaker A: Yep. [00:44:18] Speaker B: And then just creates the zappin, like an absolutely massive explosion with that portal. [00:44:27] Speaker C: Yeah, you get a good full page panel here. [00:44:31] Speaker B: Yeah. And you got Medieval Spawn with his, like, leather. His leather shield. [00:44:37] Speaker C: Yeah, it's still got his face on it, though. I love that. [00:44:41] Speaker B: And then out of nowhere, this. This arrow comes swooping right through the air and hits Fitzroy right in the eye. And it's. It's young Richard. Old Tricky Dick himself is like, yeah, I. I waited like three seconds after you said to stay here that I. I just followed you. Medieval just like fucking stabs him. Stabs. [00:45:07] Speaker A: Yeah. I love this little Fitzroy, right? You just want to be free of the screams and Medieval's like, we are damned. We don't deserve to be free. [00:45:16] Speaker B: Yeah. And then after he stabs Fitzroy, Fitzroy gets like the. The Nazi in Indiana Jones 3 treatment where he just like suddenly decays very quickly into a. Into a skeleton. [00:45:29] Speaker C: Dust and bones. [00:45:30] Speaker B: Yeah. Is that the amulet that we. [00:45:34] Speaker A: Donovan wasn't a Nazi. Okay. He was an American that wanted to be a Nazi. [00:45:38] Speaker B: But he had the little pin on his lapel, Johnny. Because the wind goes to reveal the lapel pin. [00:45:46] Speaker A: Yeah, he did. [00:45:47] Speaker B: And the amulet we saw Fitzroy stealing earlier is exposed there on the ground. I have a feeling that's going to be Chekhov's amulet, Johnny. [00:45:56] Speaker A: Something's gonna happen with it. [00:45:59] Speaker B: We wouldn't be seeing it now if it weren't important. [00:46:03] Speaker C: And then I bet Tricky Dick gets it. That's my. That's my. [00:46:06] Speaker B: Yeah, I would assume so. [00:46:09] Speaker C: Or Cuthbert. [00:46:10] Speaker B: He just like swoops in out of nowhere. So then Medieval's like, well, we got a job to do now. We gotta cleanse the village. And they cleanse it with fire. Johnny is burn it. [00:46:27] Speaker C: They burn it. [00:46:28] Speaker B: And then while the village Is burning. Richard's like, hey, can I. Can I train to do some sword shit with you? Obviously, I don't have a home to go back to, so. [00:46:38] Speaker A: Just burned it. [00:46:39] Speaker B: Could I just. Could I just hang out with you guys? Immediately responds like, sure, fine, whatever. [00:46:44] Speaker C: It's gonna be hard. Do you. Are you okay with that? All right. Sure. [00:46:48] Speaker B: Kid just burned his whole home to the ground. Do you think he cares? [00:46:51] Speaker C: What the hell else is he gonna do? [00:46:54] Speaker B: He ain't even got any sheep. [00:46:57] Speaker C: And then we get, yeah, they left the sheep. [00:46:59] Speaker B: The final. The final splash page is just medieval striding away from the fire, just being like, boy, that was a mistake, wasn't it? [00:47:08] Speaker C: And here's his. Like, this is the third time. Yeah. If only I'd known what was happening, I would have snuffed the life out with the boy there and then. [00:47:15] Speaker A: Oh, my God, man. That's what Qui. Gon Jinn said. [00:47:20] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:47:21] Speaker A: He just kills Anakin. [00:47:25] Speaker B: I mean, Darth Maul almost got it on him. [00:47:28] Speaker A: He almost ran him over. [00:47:30] Speaker B: Oh, boy. [00:47:31] Speaker A: Ran his ass over. [00:47:32] Speaker B: What's would have been a real, real short series if that had gone. [00:47:36] Speaker C: Sure would have. [00:47:36] Speaker B: Another way. [00:47:38] Speaker C: So the digital. If you're doing digital, is the. Is the next page for you guys an ad for, like, Salmon Twitch, Rat City? [00:47:43] Speaker A: Yes. [00:47:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:47:44] Speaker C: Stuff. [00:47:45] Speaker B: So we get. [00:47:45] Speaker C: What is the difference between the deadly tales of the gunslingers? [00:47:48] Speaker B: This. [00:47:49] Speaker C: Another gunslinger story. Yes, indeed. Another gun series series. [00:47:52] Speaker A: This one's superior because instead of being a man at a time where he's in the modern times, it's actually set in the old West. [00:48:00] Speaker C: Got it. And very, like, no dinosaurs. Probably not yet. [00:48:04] Speaker B: There was a magical evil circus, though. [00:48:07] Speaker A: It was cool. [00:48:08] Speaker C: That's good. [00:48:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:48:08] Speaker A: It's kind of reminds me like. It's like kind of. It's like a fantasy bone tomahawkish. [00:48:16] Speaker C: Okay. [00:48:17] Speaker B: Kind of bone tomahawk meets 3:10 to Yuma. Johnny. [00:48:21] Speaker A: That's. Yeah. So they pushed it. [00:48:22] Speaker B: Yeah. But the guy who writes it, Jimmy Palmiotti, he. He spent like 20 years writing Western comics, so is. It's very western with some spookiness in it instead of whatever the hell a gunslinger has become. [00:48:40] Speaker C: And then I have an ad for just comic books generally, some image classic classics, and then a hilarious ad for Shrek where there. The faces that the dragon and TR are making. And like, the close up of this is, like, so awesome. [00:48:59] Speaker B: So I am. I am very glad that you got to be on an episode with this ad, because this is a rare ad for us to run into To Bran. [00:49:07] Speaker C: Really? [00:49:08] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:49:08] Speaker A: This third or fourth time covering. [00:49:10] Speaker B: I think it's the third time we've seen it. It's just like. It's funny that they would choose Shrek and. And the dragon instead of Donkey. [00:49:19] Speaker C: I know. No, Donkey. No. Like, no. I doesn't put some boots, like such a money maker for him. It's hilarious to pick the two of these. Just good looking figs, though. [00:49:29] Speaker B: Yeah. I like how they have them positioned because it's very. It's very much like looking to lose a friend. [00:49:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:36] Speaker B: It's like donkeys left me like four times already. Let's just. Let's just make this final. [00:49:42] Speaker C: Hilarious. [00:49:43] Speaker A: It's just so funny that in the year of our Lord 2025, in the medieval Spawn comic, they're like, which ad for toys should we put it in? They're like, sure. [00:49:49] Speaker B: Shrek. [00:49:50] Speaker C: Yes, Shrek. [00:49:52] Speaker A: Put the Shrek in there. That's funny. [00:49:55] Speaker B: It's effective. We're talking about it, aren't we, Johnny? [00:49:57] Speaker A: Yeah, and I've mentioned this before, but McFarland made the original Shrek 1 figures. They're like really high quality. [00:50:04] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:50:04] Speaker C: I mean, these look really nice. Look at the texture on Shrek's shirt, man. It's crazy. [00:50:08] Speaker B: The structure, that's insane. [00:50:10] Speaker A: We gotta get one for the structure on his shirt. [00:50:12] Speaker B: Look at that. Look at that little. That little mischievous grin. [00:50:17] Speaker A: Shrek's coming back. [00:50:21] Speaker C: Shrek never left, man. [00:50:22] Speaker B: Oh, no. Yeah, he didn't. He's. He's always been here in this swamp. [00:50:27] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:50:29] Speaker C: What else? Final thoughts on. On this. [00:50:33] Speaker B: Speaking of Diablo, we got a Diablo 4 ad on the back. [00:50:35] Speaker C: Oh, true. [00:50:36] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:50:37] Speaker A: That's nice. [00:50:38] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:50:38] Speaker A: Well, I'll be getting that, Lilith. Well, it is. David had a rambunctious puppy. [00:50:43] Speaker B: Yep. He's. He's. He has relieved himself of the devil's piss, apparently, Johnny, because now he is asleep. [00:50:49] Speaker A: Okay. [00:50:50] Speaker B: Well, I would say that improves his rating significantly. So while I'm rating this puppy significantly better than previously, we got this puppy to rate Johnny. It's time to rate the puppy. [00:51:01] Speaker A: It's time to rate the puppy. So today we just had one comic. Medieval Spawn Number one. It's a good intro, like you said. It's like an opening cutscene. It's like an opening, like after you feel like the title should pop up at the end when he's walking away to say Medieval Spawn. [00:51:20] Speaker B: It should be in flames. [00:51:22] Speaker A: In flames, but in flesh. It's fun. It's a fun story. You know, it's. [00:51:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:28] Speaker A: You know, it's got good action. Demons. Cool. Villain. The art's really clean and, like, the colors really pop, I think. And like, the fire reflecting on everything. Like, that's. The oranges and the blues are really good. But yeah, I mean, this is the. I haven't read beyond this I've since I'm so behind on Spawn. But I'm excited to see where it goes. [00:51:50] Speaker B: Me too. [00:51:51] Speaker A: I like Rory McConville. I like Demon medieval shit. So it's fun. It's a fun quick read. [00:51:58] Speaker C: Makes me want to play Doom. The Dark Ages. [00:52:01] Speaker A: Exactly. So I'm going to give it compliment. 3.5 arrows to the eye out of 5. [00:52:07] Speaker B: Nice. That's a good one. [00:52:10] Speaker A: David. [00:52:10] Speaker B: Me. I agree. It's the. The biggest problem with it is it's just so short. I have a feeling this is going to be something that. It's just going to be much nicer to just rip through all of them at once instead of one at a time. [00:52:25] Speaker C: One at a time. [00:52:26] Speaker B: It'll be a nice. A nice little sit down, read the. This is the first time we've seen this artist. I like it. I like it. It's. It's very reminiscent of Steven Segovia speaking Scorched and. Yeah, I'm. I'm interested to see what kind of nonsense this little. This little shit Richard's gonna get into and how medieval's gonna deal with it. If current. [00:52:48] Speaker C: Probably with cutting his head off. [00:52:51] Speaker B: Current Medieval is any. Any indication, he's probably just going to beat the shit out of him. But yeah, no, it's fun. It's great. I'm excited to see where it goes. And Rory McConville puts together a good story. He really doesn't miss. I will. I will meet you there and I will give it three and a half Cyclops skulls in the black vault. There's a Cyclops skull in there. [00:53:13] Speaker C: Oh, I'm gonna look at. I'm gonna look at that image now. That's fun. [00:53:17] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:19] Speaker A: What about you, Bram? What would you give it out of five? [00:53:24] Speaker C: Yeah, I mean, I think it's nice and tight. It's like a classic medieval story, like. And the artwork looks great. Yeah. I have no problems with it at all. And it also is not like super. You know, I'm not super jazzed about it, but I do like the artwork and stuff, so I'll match that as well. I'm gonna give it three and a half. Goopy skeleton guys. Out of five. Goopy skeleton guys. [00:53:55] Speaker B: Nice. [00:53:55] Speaker C: 200. I guess if I was doing. What's. What's the fraction reduced there? If there's 200 in town. Let's just say 350 out of 500. Nice goopy skeleton, guys. [00:54:06] Speaker A: Yep. [00:54:06] Speaker C: Or that's a two, three and a half swords. [00:54:09] Speaker B: A lot of goopy skeleton, guys. [00:54:11] Speaker C: It's true. It is a lot of scoopy. [00:54:13] Speaker A: We love a goofy skeleton. [00:54:14] Speaker B: Oh, this flesh sword is gonna haunt my dreams. Oh, so gross. It's like something out of the substance. [00:54:23] Speaker C: Yeah. Or I mean, honestly, kind of Evil Dead coded with the veiny. [00:54:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:54:29] Speaker A: While you're thinking about veins and Evil Dead, don't search that on the Internet. You could if you wanted, but if you're looking for stuff on the Internet to look up, make sure to check out Lonnie Bones. He does our music. [00:54:40] Speaker B: Yes, indeed. [00:54:41] Speaker A: Make sure to check us out. We are regarding spawn pod on Instagram, and you can reach us by [email protected] every week. Like to ask a question. This week I would ask, what is your medieval bona fides listener? Do you. Are you a big nerd? Like, our friend Logan is super into it. Are you, you know, lukewarm on it? Do you hate it? [00:55:04] Speaker B: Did you play that PlayStation game in the late 90s? [00:55:08] Speaker A: Medieval. [00:55:09] Speaker B: Medieval. [00:55:10] Speaker A: Yeah. I never played it. I always thought it looked cool. [00:55:13] Speaker B: It does look cool. That's. [00:55:14] Speaker C: Speaking of, like, one off, kind of like mascoty guys. [00:55:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:55:19] Speaker B: Yeah. I thought he was gonna hang around much longer than he did. [00:55:22] Speaker C: Yeah. Because he's got a good look. [00:55:23] Speaker A: Yeah, he's like a skeleton guy, right? [00:55:25] Speaker B: He's. [00:55:25] Speaker C: Yeah, he's just. Well, he's like a suit of armor with just a skull for a head. [00:55:29] Speaker B: Yeah, he doesn't. He doesn't have the jaw. [00:55:31] Speaker C: Like Jack Scarab. [00:55:32] Speaker B: Two different colors. [00:55:32] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. He doesn't have the jaw. You're right. He's got, like, just the teeth. [00:55:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:55:37] Speaker B: Like, whatever happened, he looked kind of like a. Like a skeleton version of Earthworm Jim. [00:55:42] Speaker A: Wasn't it the same guy? [00:55:44] Speaker C: Totally. [00:55:44] Speaker B: Might have been the same guy. [00:55:46] Speaker A: Might have been. We love Earthborne Jim, so. Yeah, let us know. What do you think of Medieval Times stuff? What do you think of Medieval Times even? [00:55:54] Speaker B: Yeah, send us some tickets to Medieval Times. Just do it. [00:55:59] Speaker A: Send us some tickets to Medieval Times. Brandon, is there anyone you'd like to shout out on Instagram or otherware? [00:56:08] Speaker C: I don't know. Downline. Download Silksong from Team Cherry. [00:56:12] Speaker A: We like it. [00:56:13] Speaker C: Good game. I have no affiliation with them other than liking that game. The first game, a lot. And it's $20. [00:56:20] Speaker B: Yeah, you got to do it. [00:56:21] Speaker A: You got to do it or was that game pass? [00:56:22] Speaker C: Can you buy a brand new game for $20? I'm probably going to buy it on multiple systems just to be able to play it on the road too. [00:56:30] Speaker B: Awesome. [00:56:31] Speaker C: That's great. [00:56:32] Speaker B: That's great. That's great. That seems very also spawn adjacent. Yes, it's true. Speaking of spawn adjacent. Johnny, we gotta. We gotta keep reading some adjacent spawn stuff because they're still making it. So we still gotta read it. [00:56:46] Speaker A: Absolutely. And then we're behind on Sam and Twitch and Rat City. So I think we should do that. [00:56:52] Speaker B: Yep. All right, awesome. So we're gonna do Sam and Twitch Case files and rat cities. 13. Next. [00:56:58] Speaker A: Lucky 13. [00:56:59] Speaker B: Number, number. Lucky 13. [00:57:01] Speaker A: All right, cool. [00:57:02] Speaker B: Pretty spooky episode. [00:57:03] Speaker C: Well, happy number 150. [00:57:04] Speaker A: Thank you. Yeah, it's been an interesting journey. Can't believe we made it this far. I'm very honored to be here, David. [00:57:10] Speaker B: It's. It's. It doesn't feel like we've done more than like 12 of these. [00:57:15] Speaker A: I know. It feels like we've done like, I don't know, like 40 or 50. [00:57:18] Speaker B: I can remember, like maybe a solid 30 minutes of stuff I've actually said on this show. [00:57:23] Speaker A: Yeah. And mostly it's just the same thing said over and over again. So. [00:57:26] Speaker B: Yeah, but we say it. We say it every few episodes, so that's. That's fine. It's not too repetitive. [00:57:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:57:33] Speaker B: Well, thank you. Thank you. Thanks for being here to celebrate with us. [00:57:37] Speaker C: Yeah, no problem. [00:57:38] Speaker B: I wish we had thought to get cake. God damn it. [00:57:41] Speaker A: I have a frappe. [00:57:43] Speaker B: Oh, I have cold dregs of coffee. [00:57:47] Speaker A: Hey, I'll drink to that. [00:57:49] Speaker B: Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Well, so happy 150 episodes. Thank you for being here and listening to us yap about Spawn for a little over three years. It's been very exciting and, well, you know, that's a lot of yapping. So I don't really have much else to say. Except for Johnny Bran. May the scorched be with you. [00:58:11] Speaker A: And also with you, David. [00:58:13] Speaker B: Hell yeah. [00:58:14] Speaker A: Hell yeah. [00:58:16] Speaker C: Hell yeah. [00:58:16] Speaker B: Hell yeah. [00:58:21] Speaker A: I guess I'm off to go play some Diablo. [00:58:47] Speaker B: Sa.