[00:00:00] Speaker A: And if at this moment, a new Bible were to be written of this battle, its first chapter and verse might read. And on that day, the cosmos shuddered, then enveloped into its darkness. All that was light in the world.
But soon, the world's black void rose up in the form of demons, hellspawns, sinners, and the undead. Their names spoken in whispers. Mon Redeemer, the antigod, spawn, and priest, the she spawn. They were the forsaken few who traded their lives to protect the innocent.
Good evening, and welcome to the malbols. This is regarding spawn, the world's best spawn podcast. I'm your co host, John Fisher.
[00:01:21] Speaker B: And I am your co host, David Williams. And Johnny, it's that time of year again, where no matter who's using a computer, it looks like a pervert uses that computer.
[00:01:33] Speaker A: Why?
[00:01:33] Speaker B: There's hand lotion right next to it. There's a whole bunch of Kleenex.
[00:01:37] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:01:39] Speaker B: Used kleenexes just scattered about. Because let me tell you, even if not pervert looks like a pervert because.
[00:01:46] Speaker A: You got a cold and your hands are dry.
[00:01:48] Speaker B: I always feel very weird, like, when the air gets dry, having to pull out my big bottle of hand lotion at work and sit it next to my computer and be like, I promise it's just for wholesome activities. I don't like my hands to feel gross.
[00:02:04] Speaker A: That's it. That's the only reason.
[00:02:06] Speaker B: That's it.
Those Kleenexes just got snot in them. I've been very snotty.
[00:02:10] Speaker A: I haven't been looking at my spawn. The movie trading cards of.
[00:02:16] Speaker B: Saying Jessica Priest should be over.
This week's. This week's guardian angel is going to be clown. Clown's tragic follower.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: You got clown watching you.
[00:02:27] Speaker B: It's just got clowns kneeling on the ground, holding crispy Simmons to the ground. Crispy Simmons and his coat given to him by the unhomed men. Yeah.
[00:02:37] Speaker A: Was it Tod McFarlane?
[00:02:38] Speaker B: Well, I don't think Tod McFarland gives him anything. He just looks at him and then disappears around a corner. Yeah.
[00:02:45] Speaker A: Todd the bum, man. Todd the bum.
[00:02:47] Speaker B: That's going to be a great card when we get it.
[00:02:49] Speaker A: He's got to come back for the new movie.
[00:02:51] Speaker B: Yeah, he does. Yeah, he does.
[00:02:53] Speaker A: He's got to have a Cameo.
[00:02:55] Speaker B: Although you think maybe since his face is kind of a little tall and skinny, that he might be become our info buz pundit. He could pan to him, and he's like, classic info buz pendant. And he's talking about how all of these world leaders can't dress for beans.
[00:03:14] Speaker A: I hope so.
[00:03:15] Speaker B: That would be great, because then he could be talking about this new guy on the scene, Spawn. And have you seen his costume? It is beautiful. It's talking about all the red and the black and the big woo. That would be great, because he could just talk about what he loves about a character he created.
[00:03:34] Speaker A: You talk about how awesome Spawn is, man.
[00:03:37] Speaker B: That's great. I hope that, like, we do, we're.
[00:03:41] Speaker A: Just like the Tod father. We just talk about how awesome Spawn is.
[00:03:45] Speaker B: Although that can't happen if the Todd father is also the director, because then he'll just keep all of it in.
[00:03:50] Speaker A: Right?
[00:03:53] Speaker B: Or, like, somebody has to have editorial oversight to be, like, tod Todd.
It's a film. It's a film, not a YouTube video.
[00:04:04] Speaker A: Please welcome.
[00:04:05] Speaker B: Don't show them how to draw a chippy spawn in the movie, please. We already have that.
[00:04:10] Speaker A: Show them. Do it.
Welcome, everybody. Welcome to regarding Spawn, the Spawn podcast, where each week we bring you two issues from Spawn's universe. Two for the price of one. You don't have to listen to two episodes. You only got to listen to one episode, and you get two issues. Yeah, and we get a lot of issues because we both have issues, me and David.
[00:04:32] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:04:33] Speaker A: So you get to hear about our issues and our issues. So it's really a really nice thing.
[00:04:39] Speaker B: Also keeping on that pervert train. Johnny, it's our 69th episode.
[00:04:44] Speaker A: Oh, 69th.
[00:04:46] Speaker B: Internet rules say that every time the sex number is invoked, you got to say nice. So nice.
Thank you for sticking around for a nice number of episodes, y'all. Here's nice. More.
[00:05:00] Speaker A: I'm surprised we made it this far without skipping a week, honestly.
[00:05:03] Speaker B: Yeah, me too. It almost had.
[00:05:05] Speaker A: I got a knock. Knock on some wood. No, it didn't. And we have an episode in the back burner. We would have been fine.
[00:05:12] Speaker B: Yeah, but we're here.
[00:05:14] Speaker A: I'm still a little Toasty from the night before. Hopefully my mom's not listening to this episode.
I met a friend, and we stayed out too late, and here we are.
[00:05:26] Speaker B: You met a friend and you liked it.
[00:05:29] Speaker A: I did.
Too much.
[00:05:33] Speaker B: You're still liking it a little bit.
[00:05:36] Speaker A: Now I'm starting to get. Now that I'm talking, I'm starting to run out.
[00:05:39] Speaker B: Oh, no.
You're using up the last of that precious, precious ethanol fuel.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: Yeah, I know. I got to go get a beer. Hold on. No, I'm kidding.
[00:05:48] Speaker B: You got to pull into the sunico and top up a little bit.
[00:05:51] Speaker A: No, I'm drinking a topo chico. Nice and refreshing.
[00:05:54] Speaker B: Nice.
That'll clear out all the valves.
[00:05:57] Speaker A: Yes, it will. But this week we got two issues of Spawn. Well, two issues from Spawn. We have spawn 325.
And all the way back from. Let's see here. I can't even read this. Hold on. Let me put my glasses on. December 2021. Two years ago. So two years ago. Two years ago, exactly. And then all the way back from just a few months ago in September, 2023 is scorch 22.
[00:06:28] Speaker B: Damn.
[00:06:28] Speaker A: This is from September.
[00:06:29] Speaker B: Yeah, that was funny enough. That was also two years ago.
[00:06:32] Speaker A: Seems like it sure does. Brutally. One and beyond this, aren't we?
[00:06:38] Speaker B: Well, there's been one issue of scorched since this one come out.
[00:06:44] Speaker A: Since this one come out.
[00:06:47] Speaker B: I know language. Speak good. Well, tough.
[00:06:50] Speaker A: That's because it's been a little less inconsistent. It's a little more inconsistent recently, that's why.
[00:06:54] Speaker B: Yeah, since that first time we complained about a no spawn week, there have been, like, four or five no spawn weeks.
[00:07:02] Speaker A: I know.
[00:07:03] Speaker B: So maybe we should stop complaining about it.
[00:07:06] Speaker A: And there will be no, don't mention it. Don't say anything about it.
[00:07:09] Speaker B: I have no issues with the release schedule of spawn comics at all. Thank you.
[00:07:15] Speaker A: Thank you so much. No, it's some wild issues, especially this first one here. We might as well just get right into it. We got 325. Oh, they're starting.
Okay, so this is also a special event because for those of you that have been listening for this long, it was a year ago today that I cleared out one of my closets to make a recording studio. And the reason for that is there is a toys for tots motorcycle drive going on. So if you hear some motorcycles, they're going up and down Western Avenue in Chicago. Just tons and tons of motorcycles. So you might hear that today.
[00:07:50] Speaker B: Toys for tot motorcycle parade and the dikes on bikes and the pride parade are literally the only two acceptable times for you to have loud ass motorcycle for any reason the rest of the time. Just fucking stop it. We don't need to hear that on a regular basis.
[00:08:07] Speaker A: Damn. Here's your old man card, David.
[00:08:09] Speaker B: Oh, man. I could just be, like, enjoying my. Just enjoying my walk to work, and this fucking motorcycle blares by whoever decided to put speakers on motorcycles. I want to punch that person, because that shit's real loud and it's real annoying.
[00:08:24] Speaker A: Does get really loud.
[00:08:25] Speaker B: You might hear it today, but this is an acceptable use of that technology.
[00:08:31] Speaker A: It's true. It's true.
[00:08:32] Speaker B: It's true.
[00:08:33] Speaker A: If we got the toys it's toys for tots. It's for the tots, David.
[00:08:38] Speaker B: All the tots. Tots, tots, tots.
[00:08:40] Speaker A: Tot talk.
[00:08:41] Speaker B: The Todd father would be very pro toys for tots parade. Can you imagine them going by his house and being like, hold on, guys. He's just got, like, an arm full of toys that he's like, hold on, hold on. They're just, like, falling behind him. He's leaving a trail of toys and he's just like, here, take them. Make the kids happy.
[00:08:59] Speaker A: You know what else? The top father's pro.
[00:09:01] Speaker B: What's that?
[00:09:01] Speaker A: Not writing shit on this issue.
[00:09:03] Speaker B: Hey, but hey, Jenny, we should probably cover this covers first before we get in that hat.
[00:09:09] Speaker A: I know. I was flipping open and I was like, blue. He's not anywhere.
[00:09:14] Speaker B: Well, fun fact, speaking of covers, the back side of Spawn 324 said that for Spawn 325, it was going to be written by Spawn creator Todd McFarland. And the COVID of Spawn 325 says Todd McFarland on it.
[00:09:28] Speaker A: It's a lie.
[00:09:29] Speaker B: It's a lie. We've been lied to. We've been lied to. But what cover are you working with?
[00:09:34] Speaker A: Oh, I got the Bjorn Barons cover.
[00:09:36] Speaker B: I also have the Bjorn Barons cover. And this, like usual, is absolutely brutal.
[00:09:42] Speaker A: It's epic.
[00:09:43] Speaker B: Oh, boy.
[00:09:44] Speaker A: It's spawn.
[00:09:45] Speaker B: It's ninja Spawn specifically.
[00:09:47] Speaker A: Ninja Spawn specifically. Holding up a dead body that he cut, like, the top of the head off, like, from the jaw.
[00:09:52] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. You don't see that decapitation point very often. They usually go right at the neck. But this one is infinitely more gruesome.
[00:10:00] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Because you get like the teeth hanging out there, man.
[00:10:05] Speaker B: Gives me the heebie GB's.
[00:10:06] Speaker A: Yeah. Ninja spawn cut off a dude's head. He's dead.
[00:10:10] Speaker B: There's a dude in the background that's got, like, the sword. He's like, in the sword swallower position, but he didn't do it right.
[00:10:16] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:10:17] Speaker B: It was just like shoved down his throat.
[00:10:19] Speaker A: It's quite epic.
[00:10:20] Speaker B: All the way down to those wooden sandals. Oh, boy, look at the veins on those feet, dude. Man. Bjorn Barrons is pulling out all the stops this time.
[00:10:28] Speaker A: And the second cover is Donna Yu gi.
[00:10:31] Speaker B: Oh, this one has that problem that I have with spawn covers, Joni, because you know what it's got on it that does not appear in this issue?
[00:10:41] Speaker A: What?
[00:10:42] Speaker B: It's got monkey on it.
[00:10:43] Speaker A: Oh, no.
[00:10:44] Speaker B: It's got hella monkey on it. It's got, like the most dramatic monkey ever conceived. Not only does it have monkey on it, but it's got forced perspective monkey. So there's a gigantic monkey fist at the very foreground. It's an absolutely crazy cover. I really wish I had it. Damn it. But there's no monkey in the issue.
[00:11:07] Speaker A: There's really not.
[00:11:09] Speaker B: There's not even just monkey in the background.
I don't even think our second book has any monkey in it.
[00:11:15] Speaker A: No.
[00:11:15] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:11:16] Speaker A: I finally pulled out the COVID Yeah, it looks epic. It's kind of a crazy angle on him.
[00:11:20] Speaker B: Yeah, he's like he's fallen from the heavens. There's some chain in the background. It kind of looks like it's situated to be part of a interconnected series of covers.
[00:11:29] Speaker A: Kind of does. Yeah, I can see that. But yeah, on that cover and my cover, it says Tod McFarland wrote it. But he fucking didn't.
[00:11:38] Speaker B: No, he didn't. He's a fucking liar.
[00:11:40] Speaker A: I'm quitting this podcast. He lied.
[00:11:43] Speaker B: Not only is he lazy, but he's also a liar. How dare he?
[00:11:46] Speaker A: He's a lazy liar.
We're kidding. He's not a lazy liar. But the reason why we're dwelling on this is because usually on the credits.
[00:11:55] Speaker B: When you crack open the issue there.
[00:11:57] Speaker A: Crack it open. It's cracked. Usually you have your writer and then you have an additional script or additional plot. Or additional script plot by Todd McFarlane.
[00:12:05] Speaker B: Or additional edit this one.
[00:12:06] Speaker A: Or additional edits this one does not. It just says, rory McConville, script plot. That's it.
[00:12:13] Speaker B: This is full throated Rory through and through, full throttle. We got the roar father going on now. No, Tod father. Get that guy out of here. We got a new dad in town.
[00:12:23] Speaker A: Yeah, sorry, dad.
[00:12:24] Speaker B: The McCon father. There we go. There's better than the roar father. The McCon father.
[00:12:31] Speaker A: Pretty close.
[00:12:32] Speaker B: Oh, nice. But then we also have Carlo Barberi on art, so that's keeping it consistent. And if I may say so, an absolute excellent outing by Carlo Barberi in this issue.
[00:12:42] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. And he gets lots of spawns to draw.
[00:12:45] Speaker B: It's real good. It's real rich, it's real textured. There's so much detail in this issue that I think Carlo Barberia might have gone a little bit insane, but I'm here for it.
[00:12:56] Speaker A: Then we've got Tom Horzachikowski on lettering.
[00:12:59] Speaker B: The Tom father's very good.
[00:13:01] Speaker A: J. David Ramos on.
[00:13:03] Speaker B: Yep, we already covered the covers, so you know about that.
[00:13:06] Speaker A: And then there he is, Tod McFarland, creative director. He's in there a little bit. He's in there a little bit.
[00:13:12] Speaker B: I don't know if being creative director gives him under the title listing on the COVID credits.
[00:13:20] Speaker A: But, I mean, it shouldn't.
[00:13:22] Speaker B: But we should probably just fix this now by crossing it out. His name on the front, writing Rory McConville. And then with all good legal things, you have to put GCP on it or good clinical practice. And we have to initial and date any changes we make. So that way everybody who looks at it later knows that. Aha. Yes, we did catch that. That wasn't something we snuck in.
[00:13:45] Speaker A: GCP.
[00:13:46] Speaker B: GCP.
[00:13:47] Speaker A: And then we have the editor, Mr. Thomas Healy.
[00:13:50] Speaker B: Hell yeah.
[00:13:51] Speaker A: So previously in Spawn. Okay, it's a long one. Here we go.
[00:13:55] Speaker B: Him.
[00:13:56] Speaker A: Mark Rosen has been at Al's side for what seems like an eternity, putting his life on the line for a man whose cause he believes in. Now, with his Newfound powers, doubt is beginning to creep in, and the words of Jim Downing are starting to make sense. Wow.
[00:14:12] Speaker B: Now this is a classic.
[00:14:14] Speaker A: This is a classic has nothing to do with this issue.
[00:14:16] Speaker B: Yeah, that is something that happened previously.
[00:14:18] Speaker A: Yes, true.
[00:14:20] Speaker B: But I remember very distinctly when I was starting getting back into Spawn. This being one of the first bits, me reading that and being like, what the fuck does that have to do with anything? I don't get it.
[00:14:31] Speaker A: This issue. Nothing.
[00:14:33] Speaker B: Absolutely no.
This is like the beach episode issue of the anime, where instead of following along the weeks long arc of the story that has high stakes and the world is about to end. They ran out of time at the animation studio. We're just like, throw some old shit on there for this week. It'll be fine.
[00:14:56] Speaker A: And they go to the beach.
[00:14:57] Speaker B: They go to the beach.
[00:14:58] Speaker A: Go to the beach. Beach.
Nicki Minjaj.
[00:15:03] Speaker B: But I'm not a big fan of the beach in general, Johnny. But I definitely wouldn't want to go to the beach where this issue takes place, because that's a very dangerous place to be, which we can see.
We start right on a close up on some feet, running through some mud there. So first off, muddy beach. No, thank you. Yeah, we open on Centurion spawn, which.
[00:15:26] Speaker A: You can't just say that, like, flippantly.
[00:15:29] Speaker B: No, I said we opened on some feet, running through some mud. And it literally says for this, centurion spawn are the first four words in this. It's.
[00:15:38] Speaker A: I know, but this is the first time we're seeing Centurion spawn. This is monumental.
[00:15:41] Speaker B: Yeah, but I was just about to get to the point that he looks super cool. We've never seen him before, Johnny.
[00:15:47] Speaker A: Okay, well, I'm getting ahead of you because I'm just so excited that we've got, like, four new possible spawns in this issue.
[00:15:54] Speaker B: Look at how cool this guy is. He's the only spawn we've seen wearing sandals so far.
[00:15:59] Speaker A: Because usually you're a history guy. What exactly is a centurion?
[00:16:03] Speaker B: Was like a roman soldier, right?
[00:16:07] Speaker A: Is that it?
[00:16:07] Speaker B: I think so.
[00:16:08] Speaker A: I don't know. I've only seen 300. That's the only thing I know about history.
[00:16:11] Speaker B: You haven't seen Gladiator? How dare you?
[00:16:14] Speaker A: Yeah. Is he a centurion in that?
[00:16:16] Speaker B: No, I think there are some, because I think centurions are just roman soldiers.
[00:16:19] Speaker A: You want to look at Centurion candidate?
[00:16:22] Speaker B: Yeah.
We've just activated some people to walk around in phalanxes and utilize the roads we've just built.
[00:16:32] Speaker A: No, it's a roman soldier. Okay. I don't know.
[00:16:34] Speaker B: Hey, there's a common misconception that all middle aged white men just obsess about history. I'm not one of those.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: Okay, I thought you did.
[00:16:44] Speaker B: No, I know a little bit about all of the things that I enjoy, but it's fun because everybody's like, you should do trivia. You would be great at trivia. And it's like, no, you see my trivia.
[00:16:57] Speaker A: Everyone says that to me, too.
[00:16:59] Speaker B: The stuff that I like to fill my brain with is not the stuff that they write trivia questions about.
I know. Nothing practical.
[00:17:07] Speaker A: Yeah, I agree.
[00:17:08] Speaker B: But anyway, we've got Centurion spawn. He's running through the woods. He was ambushed and he's getting chased. He's getting chased down like a dog.
[00:17:16] Speaker A: He just opens and he's running and.
[00:17:19] Speaker B: Basically he knows he's beat, but he's trying to get himself. He's going to fight till the bitter end. So that's what he's doing. He's trying to get to a position that he can sort of defend himself. And so he's just running. He gets in the back there a.
[00:17:34] Speaker A: Little bit by a beam.
[00:17:36] Speaker B: Yeah. Beamed right in the head or right in the, like, right in the back. Right in the back.
[00:17:42] Speaker A: Right in the lower spine.
[00:17:43] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, it doesn't look like that. Feels very good. You do get a nice look at the sandal going all the way up the calf there. And that is a great look. The gladiator sandal looks great on this centurion. Can you imagine, Johnny?
[00:17:56] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, it better.
[00:17:59] Speaker B: If my legs were like that, I would totally have an issue with that top belt. That top belt would always just want to slide down the calf. I'd have to hitch it up a couple more inches so it would not slide down past the big part of the calf.
[00:18:14] Speaker A: We used to have sand and sandal. Sandal and sword mania in America because we had gladiator. And then Troy was out a few years later. Then 300 sandal. And I think it was called sword and sandal is what people used to call it.
[00:18:29] Speaker B: Yes, sword and sandal. It's like sword and sorcery versus. Which is like your Conan the barbarian sword and sandal is your. I mean, that goes all the way back to like Ben her and stuff.
[00:18:40] Speaker A: Yeah, I know, but it was popular post gladiator.
[00:18:45] Speaker B: Yeah, it comes and goes. It comes in waves, Johnny.
[00:18:48] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:18:50] Speaker B: It's that 20 year cycle where now everybody is obsessed with the. It's like, listen, y'all.
[00:18:56] Speaker A: Yeah, gladiator two is coming out.
[00:18:58] Speaker B: We can keep that shit in the 90s, please. Thank you very much.
[00:19:02] Speaker A: Did you know that?
[00:19:03] Speaker B: Yeah, gladiator two.
[00:19:04] Speaker A: Yeah, it's happening. And then hopefully Ridley Scott is directing race of the broken land.
[00:19:13] Speaker B: That's going to be so fucked up. It's going to be wild.
[00:19:15] Speaker A: I can't imagine it.
[00:19:17] Speaker B: I can. I can imagine it.
[00:19:18] Speaker A: I can imagine it.
[00:19:19] Speaker B: I did.
[00:19:19] Speaker A: It's a s Craig Zoller book for those who don't know. Writer and director of Bone Tomahawk. And it's a great book and it's wild. As my friend Caleb Branham once said. It does stuff that you can't do in anime, which. Yeah, you know how that. But he said, he said in an interview that Ridley Scott was like, I'm doing a western. And the only thing he said about is like, the script is aged like a fine whiskey. So I'm assuming that's what it is. I don't know, because he's been meaning to do this project for like six or seven years.
[00:19:51] Speaker B: Nice.
[00:19:51] Speaker A: But this isn't about cowboys.
[00:19:53] Speaker B: No, this is older west than that, Johnny.
[00:19:57] Speaker A: Yes, it's the old west.
[00:19:59] Speaker B: Yeah, the original west, if you will. And we got know after he gets sketched in the back, he lunges forth with his long lance. That's a dope lance. Carlo Barberi with the accessory pack is doing a great job. And he gets beamed down again. He's just like double beamed. And then. So he's wallowing in the mud. He speaks some Latin. Let me die with honor translated from Latin. And then we get sort of a monologue on the individual who is hunting him down and tracking him. And then we turn the page and we see there have been many names for him throughout history. But to most, he is known as the forsaken.
Guess who it is, Johnny?
[00:20:46] Speaker A: It's Redeemer. No, it's dark Redeemer.
[00:20:51] Speaker B: It's Abel himself.
[00:20:52] Speaker A: Spoiler alert.
[00:20:53] Speaker B: Cain's little brother. Older brother.
[00:20:55] Speaker A: Little brother. I think they're twins, right, Johnny?
[00:20:59] Speaker B: I don't know.
[00:21:01] Speaker A: You're the Bible expert.
[00:21:04] Speaker B: Lord have mercy.
[00:21:05] Speaker A: I'm just gonna keep accusing you of being things you're not this episode.
You're the history expert. You're the Bible expert.
[00:21:12] Speaker B: Well, that's just the aura I present of myself. And then this is me in the deposition having to admit that actually, I don't know nothing.
[00:21:21] Speaker A: You're the aura expert.
[00:21:26] Speaker B: I wouldn't even know what color would be funniest to label our auras at this moment. We'd have to call it actual expert.
[00:21:33] Speaker A: Speaking of auras, have you watched love has won on HBO?
[00:21:37] Speaker B: I have not yet, no.
[00:21:39] Speaker A: Ooh, she's a crazy lady.
[00:21:42] Speaker B: Yeah, cults. Fun stuff to learn about cults are interesting. Just like the heavens gate cult literally drove an entire sneaker line production into oblivion.
[00:21:54] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, because they all wore the sneakers.
[00:21:57] Speaker B: Yeah, because it was all part of their uniform and they were cheap, so they just bought a shit ton of them. And then immediately afterwards, Nike was like, oh, no.
So people who still have those shoes sell them for like a $1,000 on eBay right now, which I know in the shoe world isn't really a big thing because sneakers can get up there. But for some basically garbage tennis shoes, that's pretty impressive.
[00:22:22] Speaker A: That's pretty impressive because they're. Hey, I've seen air. I know all about tennis shoes.
[00:22:28] Speaker B: Johnny's a closet sneaker head.
[00:22:30] Speaker A: You know it.
[00:22:31] Speaker B: I'm much too clumsy when I walk around to ever even consider becoming a sneaker head.
[00:22:36] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. To keep them, like, nice. I don't. Oh, no.
[00:22:41] Speaker B: Me bad with shoes.
[00:22:43] Speaker A: Never going to happen.
[00:22:44] Speaker B: So after we get our nice little introduction to the forsaken one of the 12 million names of Abel, son of. Son of Eve. There we go. That's her name.
[00:22:55] Speaker A: Son of Eve. I never thought about that.
[00:22:57] Speaker B: It's son of Eve, not son of Steve.
[00:23:01] Speaker A: We know that Kage's parents are Adam and Eve.
[00:23:05] Speaker B: Yeah, not Adam and Steve.
Sorry. The name Steve is just so hilarious.
That's the name they have to use for their anti gay propaganda.
Steve.
[00:23:18] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:23:20] Speaker B: Every Steve I've ever known has been lovely. Most of them are in their sixty s now and they're just like. They're the groovy old guys who just know, everything that's going on, I'd be.
[00:23:30] Speaker A: Happy with Adam had a big dick or not.
[00:23:34] Speaker B: Okay, so we go over to.
[00:23:36] Speaker A: I was just thinking about him having sex. I was thinking about Adam Eve having sex. And I was like, I wonder how big Adam's dick was.
[00:23:42] Speaker B: Oh, Johnny, I know it's the nice episode, but I'm gonna have to drop a bonk on you right now.
[00:23:48] Speaker A: Oh, I got bonked.
I was trying to keep it in the episode. It's nice.
[00:23:55] Speaker B: Well, keep it in your episode, Johnny.
[00:24:00] Speaker A: Yeah, fair.
[00:24:02] Speaker B: We got a street scene with a whole bunch of people walking on a march with some signs, and it's over 200,000 people descended on Washington. Obviously, this is one of the pundits that we're overhearing, so it's probably the crn lady.
[00:24:16] Speaker A: Yeah, it seems pretty fair and balanced, probably.
[00:24:19] Speaker B: Yeah. So it's basically Al Simmons came out and was like, you got to start questioning the new world order. That sounds awfully brock the shock finnely. But then everybody has decided, oh, hey, yeah, let's start questioning our government. Which is awesome. Don't wait for a hell guy to come out of nowhere to shadow blast from the darkness to start questioning the government. Just do that. Just have that be your baseline. Just go ahead and start. If you ever felt you needed permission to question your government, I am giving it to you now. Just go. Then we zoom in on a very swanky business conference room here. It's a corner conference room.
[00:25:02] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:25:04] Speaker B: A shit ton of very well dressed people. All very beautiful. I'm not a businessman. I've not dealt very hot with high up business people. But if looking this good is a requirement to be in business, there's probably a reason I was never a businessman.
[00:25:21] Speaker A: Oh, David, you look that good.
[00:25:24] Speaker B: Not this good. Not this good.
Look at that ponytail that guy has at the front. Look at how long and luxurious it is.
[00:25:34] Speaker A: It is.
[00:25:35] Speaker B: So this is a company of people trying to bend their own side of the story against what Al Simmons is. You know, they're just talking about how they got to take control of the situation. We don't really know what they are yet. We just know that they're business people who have an anti Alsimon's bent.
[00:25:57] Speaker A: Yeah, we know who they are.
[00:26:00] Speaker B: Yeah, we know who they are. So we've got Cordelia, who's got that nice pixie cut and that very white dress and some excellent strappy shoes. We get a nice close up on her ankle there. Carlo Barberry obviously was like, I need an issue to just do some clothing. Just let me do some clothing a little. Please. Please.
It's like the handover from the Todd father to the macan father. Carlo was like, please. Tod doesn't give a shit about clothing. Give me some good.
It. I dig.
[00:26:39] Speaker A: And so I dig this office.
[00:26:41] Speaker B: So obviously, we know that they're bad people because they're anti spawn. And we all know that all people who are anti spawn are bad. But we're not quite sure what their position is yet. Because this is our introduction to them. We just know that the big bad of the moment. They also know about trying to put somebody on the throne of hell, which is exciting.
[00:27:01] Speaker A: Setting that up.
[00:27:02] Speaker B: Setting that up.
[00:27:03] Speaker A: A full 25 issues before it'll come to the answer.
[00:27:07] Speaker B: Yeah, but so they basically just end the meeting with the main action item being like, we got to throw some shit on spawn. And let the public know he stinks. And so then we cut to the most Fox newsiest of any pundit ever.
[00:27:23] Speaker A: Asking, yeah, he's, like, standing up.
[00:27:26] Speaker B: He's got the picture of spawn. The big question, of course, is, where is Spawn? Trying to question his credibility. By asking just, like, the dumbest of questions.
Because they think that any question is legitimate. I don't get it. I don't get it.
[00:27:42] Speaker A: It's a big question.
[00:27:43] Speaker B: It's a big question. But where is he now?
[00:27:46] Speaker A: He's watching this shit on tv.
[00:27:48] Speaker B: Yeah.
He's so upset, he didn't even have time to put on the final bit of his human costume.
[00:27:54] Speaker A: Johnny, he's just got his eyes.
[00:27:57] Speaker B: He's just got his green, glowing eyes out there for everybody to see.
[00:28:00] Speaker A: Maybe if he could use his powers. Just to see the tv in his eyes.
[00:28:05] Speaker B: Oh, maybe that would be cool.
[00:28:09] Speaker A: So he doesn't have to actually watch the screen. That'd be convenient.
[00:28:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
So he's upset at what these people are saying on the news. But then he's still doing his thing. He's still going through the book of invisibles, trying to track them all down, get some answers. And that's what we cut to. We cut to a guy going into his apartment. And immediately upon getting into his apartment, gets wrapped up in a big red cope.
[00:28:37] Speaker A: He gets spawn attacked.
[00:28:39] Speaker B: He gets spawned. Yeah. And spawn in the darkness with just his green eyes glowing, says, where's coliostro? Where is he?
[00:28:49] Speaker A: Where are the drugs?
[00:28:51] Speaker B: And then we get a gasp. Why are you doing this to me?
This guy's like, he done ghosted me. I don't know where he is. This guy.
[00:29:05] Speaker A: Yeah, that guy owes me. Money. He owes me some strawberry ripple.
[00:29:07] Speaker B: Yeah.
This guy, obviously not the cleanest cut guy in the world, but legitimately doesn't know where it is. Much like the billionaire in the killer.
Not a great guy, but in this instance, actually innocent of anything.
[00:29:28] Speaker A: That's funny. I was thinking about the killer too. He's coming into. This guy's just like, who are you? Yeah.
[00:29:35] Speaker B: So. So then Al is just like, well, I gotta go. Gotta go find more people. And we get a nice little flashback. Carlo Barberi gets to draw a little bit of the Omega island pit where Javi and Al are tied up when they take holy Oster away.
[00:29:52] Speaker A: I always love that when they have a different artist do something that's already been depicted. It's kind of fun.
[00:29:58] Speaker B: Yeah, that is real nice. The helmets on these Omega island stooges are fantastic.
They're great. Then we get a nice little montage of spawn beating up people, trying to get some information until somebody acquiesces.
[00:30:14] Speaker A: Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.
[00:30:16] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:30:18] Speaker A: Finally a guy gets, okay, okay.
[00:30:21] Speaker B: That middle one has, like, a pile of viscera in the background.
[00:30:25] Speaker A: So he's not playing kill a lot of people.
[00:30:28] Speaker B: He's not playing nice at all.
[00:30:29] Speaker A: Not at all.
[00:30:31] Speaker B: And then we learn about Fagrado is a guy who can get him in touch with Joe. And he's very much a Todd father. Bad guy.
[00:30:45] Speaker A: He's a boss.
[00:30:46] Speaker B: A big boss man. It's some good flavor, that big boss man. Look at him. Just look at him.
[00:30:52] Speaker A: He's a mid level lieutenant.
[00:30:54] Speaker B: His neck's so big, he can't button the collar on his shirt, but yet he insists on wearing a tie.
Great.
[00:31:06] Speaker A: Hey, I got a thick neck. I can understand that.
[00:31:09] Speaker B: So Spawn's got this guy's address now, and he's going to pay him a visit. He does his singing telegram act from clue, right? Yes. He puts on his little cap in his clogs and is like, I guess they were tap shoes, weren't they? I don't know. He gets to the door and nobody answers. And he's like, oh, all this effort for nothing. But no. Figreto's house is just trashed and filled with so many dead people.
[00:31:37] Speaker A: So many.
[00:31:38] Speaker B: And then spawn hears a yell, and he just boots through a door.
And we see who attacked.
[00:31:49] Speaker A: Figurative boot to the door.
Do you remember that song, boot to the.
[00:31:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Yes.
[00:31:56] Speaker A: What the fuck was that?
[00:31:58] Speaker B: I have absolutely no idea.
[00:32:00] Speaker A: It was, like, on one of those Dr. Demento things.
[00:32:03] Speaker B: I don't know. My experience was like, a Harvey. Was it a camp did.
[00:32:10] Speaker A: Oh, really?
[00:32:11] Speaker B: Yeah. Somebody put it together with a Harvey Birdman, attorney at. No, no, it wasn't Harvey Birdman because he actually dressed up like a bird. Somebody put the sound to an anime court scene thing, and that's how I know about it.
[00:32:29] Speaker A: I just know it kind of like a Dr. Demento CD they had at my summer camp when I was a kid, man.
[00:32:34] Speaker B: Dr. Demento. Speaking of demento.
Speaking of demento, we see who's ripping up all these bodies. And Johnny, it's our buddy boy, Mr. Anti knives himself.
[00:32:48] Speaker A: It's Claude, but you don't get to see his 05:00 shadow on this one.
[00:32:51] Speaker B: And he's just standing over Figreto's body with his rippling pile of intestines there.
[00:33:00] Speaker A: Oh, man, it's a lot of intestines.
[00:33:02] Speaker B: Yeah. And then haunt sees Al and lunges at him. And then we smash cut to an.
[00:33:07] Speaker A: Operating room where they're operating on a demon.
[00:33:10] Speaker B: Yeah, they're operating on a demon. I wonder if it's a depaul demon. There's not a blue d on it, so I guess not.
[00:33:16] Speaker A: Oh, my God, this reminds me of that. Do you remember that 90s video there was, like, release called alien autopsy that was supposed to be the real autopsy of area 51? Yeah, it reminds me of that because they're doing autopsy on a demon. Yeah, I mean, I believe that video.
[00:33:33] Speaker B: Was real, but what are we up to now? Is that three hearts? Four.
And that's if they're actually hearts.
So maybe the hearts that the violator pulled out in those first couple of issues that look like potatoes. Maybe it's because those mob guys were half demon and they don't have correctly shaped organs. So it's anatomically correct for a demon, just not a human.
[00:34:01] Speaker A: So potatoes not a human. That could be it.
[00:34:04] Speaker B: It's like the determining factor for figuring out if somebody's a demon or not is if their heart is the wrong shape. Much like in the television series Lois and Clark. The only way you can tell if somebody's a clone is if they ate frogs. Oh, yeah, I remember there was a season finale cliffhanger that just ended with a scene of Terry Hatcher just opening a case that had a frog in it and then lifting it to her mouth.
[00:34:30] Speaker A: I remember that she was a clone. Or that there was a clone. That was a good show.
[00:34:34] Speaker B: That was a good show. Too bad that super.
[00:34:35] Speaker A: I love Dean Kane and agree with everything he stands for currently.
Just want to get that out there.
[00:34:42] Speaker B: On the record somehow. Forgot that Superman wasn't supposed to be hateful.
He still dines out on that. He's like, I was Superman. I know. And it's like, sir, I don't think you know from Superman, even though you played him. Sorry.
[00:34:57] Speaker A: You played him in a pretty good ABC show. Okay.
[00:35:01] Speaker B: And that was in the. That should stay in the 90s. But then this little post, I was.
[00:35:07] Speaker A: Always confused by that show because I thought it was a pun on Lewis and Clark. I guess it kind of is.
[00:35:11] Speaker B: Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is. Just less icky colonization.
[00:35:15] Speaker A: Lois and Clark, the new adventures of Superman. Wasn't that what it was fully called?
[00:35:19] Speaker B: Yes, it was.
[00:35:20] Speaker A: Oh, wow.
[00:35:20] Speaker B: But so this autopsy gets interrupted by, I guess, a nurse coming in saying, Dr. Milner, Dr. Milner, you got to go. The boss is here. And we get the round eye of surprise. And haven't seen a round eye of surprise on a human before.
[00:35:33] Speaker A: This is a concerned eye of surprise.
[00:35:35] Speaker B: This guy not happy that the boss is here. And we learned that this guy, know, lost his legitimate doctor job and got recruited by this company. And they've just been having him live in this compound, experimenting on these things that they bring him. And we get him walking up to the boss lady, Cordelia, which is the lady of the. Nice suit in the conference room. And she's wearing another really great outfit.
[00:36:06] Speaker A: Yeah, she's got, like, a dress, like, shoulder pads.
[00:36:09] Speaker B: Yeah, she's looking sinister. It's got two tone. It's real nice. And so they're walking. They're looking at this collection of freaks they got. They're like, we're going to start a sideshow. Look at all these freaks we got. And Dr. Milner's like, we keep losing them. We keep losing them. I'm working as fast as I can, but they keep dying on me.
[00:36:26] Speaker A: There's like, a lizard demon, there's like, a rock demon, there's like, a smoke demon.
[00:36:30] Speaker B: And Cordelia is like, we don't give a shit if they keep dying. We got enough of these bastards. And we turn the page to see what bastards they got enough of. And Johnny, it's four spawns. It's four spawns. We've got Centurion spawn there. We've got pirate American Revolution spawn. I guess it's more american revolution spawn.
[00:36:52] Speaker A: We've got more american revolution.
[00:36:53] Speaker B: We've got orco Spawn from the masters of the Spawniverse.
And then the greatest spawn of all time, gumshoe. Gumshoe Spawn, or noir spawn.
[00:37:07] Speaker A: I don't know what you call them.
[00:37:08] Speaker B: Gumshoe I'm still waiting on that action figure, that miniseries, because that would be great. Just having just like a noir detective story starring Gumshoe Spawn. And it's like, forget it. The final line of the miniseries could be, forget it, Spawn. It's the Malbol.
[00:37:28] Speaker A: Forget it, Spawn, it's Helltown.
[00:37:33] Speaker B: And then we get it to be continued. So 1712 is Spawn's necrometer there.
[00:37:41] Speaker A: Nice.
[00:37:42] Speaker B: Not bad. Not bad. The spawning grounds for this one is some of the team's favorite covers from the past 30 years of spawn. Got some good ones.
[00:37:53] Speaker A: Good covers.
[00:37:54] Speaker B: I like that. Spawn 31. That's some good. Greg Capoulo on the original anti spawn there.
[00:37:59] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that number 74 with the clown.
[00:38:03] Speaker B: Yeah. With the little hand puppet or the little puppet he made of some guy's face.
[00:38:07] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:38:07] Speaker B: Is that supposed to be twitch?
[00:38:09] Speaker A: It better not be.
[00:38:10] Speaker B: And look, that hair is very twitch.
[00:38:13] Speaker A: It better not be. I don't want to see a dead twitch. I'd be sad.
[00:38:16] Speaker B: Johnny, we're just going to have to read to it. We're going to have to go back to those issues and read it, figure out what it's about. Some of the newer ones, they got. They got that Bjorn Baron's medieval spawn. They got that 313 original appearance of plague Spawn. Real nice.
[00:38:33] Speaker A: You got a classic she spawn up there.
[00:38:35] Speaker B: That's wicked. That's a wicked outfit. Look at that. Look at all those spikes.
[00:38:39] Speaker A: I like how it just says plague spawn in, like, just regular type at.
[00:38:43] Speaker B: The bottom of that cover.
It's just like an aerial.
[00:38:47] Speaker A: Just so you can remember. This is plague spawn.
[00:38:49] Speaker B: Just some generic San serif. Yeah, some good covers. Then we got the image classics that we always get. And then an advertisement for the scorched coming January 2022. And that's Spawn 325, Johnny.
[00:39:06] Speaker A: Damn. We, like, breeze through it. I mean, not really looking at the time, we didn't really breeze through it, but it felt like we did. Yeah, that was an unrelenting issue.
[00:39:13] Speaker B: Yeah, it's good. There's a lot of words we skipped over. We kind of just get the gist. But it's a good setting up stuff issue.
[00:39:23] Speaker A: No, it's good. Erases you to that really awesome cliffhanger. And you're just like, what?
[00:39:29] Speaker B: All these spawns?
[00:39:31] Speaker A: So many spawns.
[00:39:32] Speaker B: I'm just waiting for there to be an issue of oops.
[00:39:35] Speaker A: All spawns gonna happen.
[00:39:37] Speaker B: Like, everybody, just like, they don't comment about it ever again, but just like, everybody becomes a spawn for an issue. Like, we've got. All the pundits are spawns. Wanda's a spawn. Cyan's a spawn. Sam and twitcher.
[00:39:50] Speaker A: Terry's a spawn.
[00:39:51] Speaker B: Spaz is a spawn.
[00:39:54] Speaker A: Spaz the dog spaz.
[00:39:59] Speaker B: It's going to be great.
[00:40:00] Speaker A: I always feel like a spawn in the movie is like spaz.
[00:40:04] Speaker B: Come here.
So, Johnny, now we've got another issue to cover, don't we?
[00:40:26] Speaker A: We've got another issue to cover. Shockingly.
[00:40:30] Speaker B: I can't believe it. Johnny, you can't be pulling these kinds of surprises on me. I'm not ready.
[00:40:34] Speaker A: We've got a crazy issue, and we know it's crazy because it's the scorch.
[00:40:39] Speaker B: It's absolutely bug nuts. Not as bug nuts as it has been, but still bug nuts.
[00:40:44] Speaker A: Pretty bug nuts. The COVID that I have is not too bug nuts, though. It's pretty.
[00:40:50] Speaker B: Uh, which cover do you've got?
[00:40:53] Speaker A: I've got both, but I've got the COVID Nice.
[00:40:58] Speaker B: Nice. With the one with Jessica Priest.
[00:41:00] Speaker A: One with Jessica Priest.
[00:41:02] Speaker B: If anybody were surprised that Johnny had the Jessica priest cover. You haven't been paying attention.
[00:41:08] Speaker A: Yeah, she got hips and won't quit on this cover.
[00:41:12] Speaker B: Do I need to bust out the stick again, Johnny?
[00:41:15] Speaker A: Ow. Ow. It just hit me in the eye. Watch me hit me with that bonk stick.
[00:41:20] Speaker B: Oh, man. I have the Mike Diodato Jr. Cover that's just got medieval with a dragon on it. And it's great. It's great. The thing that cracks me up about this cover is medieval's chains. Instead of looking like hell, chains just look like the most mundane chains you've ever seen.
[00:41:39] Speaker A: It just normal chains, like, like growing.
[00:41:42] Speaker B: Up in the middle of nowhere in ranch country. This is literally the type of chain people would just, like, wrap around posts to keep a gate closed.
It's just normal chains. It's great because we forget that the spawns that have these chains, that chains are actual tools that regular people use. They're not just the sole accoutrement of the hell being. Regular people can have chains too, Johnny.
[00:42:07] Speaker A: It's true. It's true. I forget.
[00:42:08] Speaker B: This dragon also looks very excited to be there. He's just, ah, I love.
[00:42:13] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:42:14] Speaker B: Oh, nice.
[00:42:15] Speaker A: Nice Jessica priest cover. She's, like, next to a pillar that's been shot. The hell?
[00:42:20] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:42:20] Speaker A: It's like the matrix lobby.
[00:42:22] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly what I was trying to, trying to get to.
[00:42:25] Speaker A: It looks exactly like that.
[00:42:26] Speaker B: Yeah. And I like how the bullets and the belts for the chain gun she has all look like hypodermic needles.
[00:42:33] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:42:34] Speaker B: Oh, boy. They look pretty awesome. They look deadly. She is loaded for bear.
[00:42:39] Speaker A: It is good.
[00:42:40] Speaker B: That's good.
[00:42:41] Speaker A: We got to crack open this cover.
[00:42:43] Speaker B: Crack.
[00:42:44] Speaker A: This is a monumental issue as well. We haven't even mentioned this is the final Sean Lewis. Yeah, it is sad of the scorch. It might be the final Sean Lewis we cover on this podcast.
[00:42:56] Speaker B: I hope not. But if it is, heck, what a.
[00:42:59] Speaker A: Way to, you know, if he doesn't come back, then this is it.
[00:43:03] Speaker B: Yeah, that's script plot by Sean Lewis with additional script by. So, you know, he's at least getting some writing credit this episode a little bit. Can you imagine the day when Tod McFarlane doesn't have any sort of script shout out?
[00:43:18] Speaker A: I'd be happy for him. I think he needs a vacation.
[00:43:21] Speaker B: Can you imagine that guy on vacation? He's probably like, I just have even more ideas than when I left.
We got Steven Segovia doing the art, Ulysses Ariola doing the colors. Both excellent and world design doing the lettering. We've done covered the covers. Tod McFarland, creative director, editor in chief, Thomas Healy. Excellent. Good job.
[00:43:44] Speaker A: Previously in the Scorched.
She spawn, after being left for dead, has returned. Terminus plans are finally revealed.
[00:43:54] Speaker B: That's what happened. That's what happened.
[00:43:57] Speaker A: Literally what happened.
[00:43:58] Speaker B: Yeah. And unlike the previous one, is actually important to the plot of this issue.
Sorry. Yes, it makes sense. The previous issue, just hilarious. Mark Rosen didn't even show up at all in this issue, but. So we open on Jessica Priest, as we had in that opening reading. The last time we did a scorch. This she spawned Johnny. This she spawned terminus.
[00:44:26] Speaker A: It's basically just exact pickup from where we ended last time, where she was floating down into the.
[00:44:33] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. No retelling of anything at all.
[00:44:35] Speaker A: Just like, here she is.
[00:44:37] Speaker B: So she's. She's got her glowing fists of fury. She's surrounded by the cool hair and the crazy chains and a whole bunch of rocks just sort of orbiting around her. The scorched are all just looking up at amazement at her. Yeah.
[00:44:50] Speaker A: Mom's got, like, he's, like, gaping. He's like.
[00:44:53] Speaker B: He's like, what? Then Jessica says, time you abandon these throwaway warriors. Spawn, your dead zones await you. Terminus is like, you have no power over me.
[00:45:05] Speaker A: I had to explain to someone what dead zones were in Spawn last night because I was at a bar where my phone wasn't working, and I was in a dead zone.
And I didn't think about it, but he came up with the concept of dead zones in the 90s way before, like, a dead zone for cell phones would have probably been common terminology.
[00:45:21] Speaker B: Hell yeah, Johnny.
[00:45:22] Speaker A: So what that makes me think is that the cell phone people took it from Spawn.
[00:45:27] Speaker B: Are you about to tell me that technology and engineer people are potentially a little nerdy? I don't believe it, Johnny. Not for 1 second.
[00:45:36] Speaker A: It's true.
[00:45:38] Speaker B: I've never known a single engineer or technical person in my life. Nope. They must be normal people.
[00:45:43] Speaker A: They have to be. No, but imagine that they were like, what should we call a place where your cell phone doesn't work? And some Spawn nerd was like, how about dead zones?
That's what I choose to believe.
[00:45:55] Speaker B: Nice. That would be great. And senator Termis is like, gods don't have to prove themselves. And Jessica Priest is like, we'll see about that. Mudolith is just champion at the bit to get into this fight. And Spawn's like, hold on a second. Let's see what she can do. Like, let's see what the kid can do.
[00:46:11] Speaker A: Let's see what she can do.
[00:46:13] Speaker B: Jessica priest starts defisty cuffed in with senator terminus. And yeah, it does not go well for senator Terminus.
He is getting the George Soros treatment as we speak.
George Santos? George Santos. Not Soros. George Santos. Soros is the guy who paid all the protesters, right? I'm still waiting on my Soros bucks, y'all. Yeah, I need that.
[00:46:38] Speaker A: I need that money.
[00:46:39] Speaker B: We get what Jessica Priest saw as she was dying. It was her life flashing before her eyes, but flashing as it.
[00:46:48] Speaker A: Yeah, and she had a really bad dad.
[00:46:51] Speaker B: Yeah, he was piece of shit.
[00:46:52] Speaker A: She joined the army. Looks cool.
[00:46:54] Speaker B: Well, it looks cool except for those three guys in the back there that are in desperate need of a bonking. Look at that.
[00:47:01] Speaker A: Yeah, they need a bonk.
[00:47:02] Speaker B: Little shit eaters.
[00:47:03] Speaker A: I'm about to be in need of a bonk when she's killing Al Simmons. She's looking pretty good.
[00:47:07] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, you remember with her first appearance, right?
[00:47:12] Speaker A: Yeah. She gets warm in the nether regions when she kills.
[00:47:17] Speaker B: Boy, oh boy. The only thing that she's learned that she can't live without is her daughter. And so she fought for life because of that, right? Senator Terminus trying to gain the upper hand. Whaps her in the nose with his skull.
[00:47:34] Speaker A: He has a terrible senator.
[00:47:35] Speaker B: He is very bad. He's no good.
[00:47:37] Speaker A: He hasn't been to the senate floor in months.
[00:47:40] Speaker B: No, he just keeps telling everybody he's sick. But he'll be back. He's not even considering then. You know, after Jessica Priest gets thrown to the side, al's like, hey, come on, Jessica. We got this. And she says, don't touch me. She's very angry. She's very angry. He's mine.
You want to be useful? Take care of what's in the sky. And then they're all, huh?
[00:48:04] Speaker A: And they look up and they see the sin devour or not sin devourers.
[00:48:08] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, obviously this is the hillbop comet behind which is Jesus on a little spaceship. And he's coming to pick. So they're having to get on their little purple tracksuits and their nikes and they're going to get beamed up in a way and taken to the new universe.
[00:48:27] Speaker A: Those nikes cost big bucks, though.
[00:48:29] Speaker B: Yeah, well, they could just necroplasm into existence.
[00:48:33] Speaker A: That makes sense.
[00:48:35] Speaker B: Money ain't nothing when you can necroblast stuff.
[00:48:37] Speaker A: Yeah, you just create whatever you want out of necroplasm. It's pretty cool.
[00:48:40] Speaker B: Pretty dope. Prepare yourself. The planet eaters have come to devour Johnny. Can you believe it?
[00:48:46] Speaker A: I believe it.
[00:48:47] Speaker B: As though they live up to their names. Now, these planet eaters fly in some awesome ships. Look at that. Look at that.
[00:48:53] Speaker A: Yeah, they got some cool spaceships.
[00:48:54] Speaker B: That's so cool. It looks like a whole bunch of spines just kind of shoved together, which is. Yeah, it's making the middle of my back hurt a little bit. It's like, please keep my.
[00:49:07] Speaker A: So many spines.
[00:49:09] Speaker B: So many spines. Where did they get them all? So then Terminus wants to. He's pulling his spear of Longinus.
Longinus. Did we ever figure out how to pronounce that?
[00:49:22] Speaker A: Long Ginos. I think it's long Ginos is definitely, how you say it.
[00:49:30] Speaker B: Pulling that out of yours.
[00:49:33] Speaker A: He's pulled out his long gianus.
This is the 69th episode, David.
[00:49:40] Speaker B: He's tried to use it against Jessica Priest, but she just kicks him right in the face.
[00:49:45] Speaker A: Yeah, don't use your longitis on me.
[00:49:48] Speaker B: But then he shoves his longinus right in her stomach.
Oh, no, she's got Johnny. That's a weird color for necroplasm to be. It looks a little earth toned, if you'd like. Yeah, a little green, a little maybe like dirt.
[00:50:06] Speaker A: Like dirt. And she pulls it. She pulls it closer.
[00:50:10] Speaker B: Yeah, she's like I'm imagining.
[00:50:12] Speaker A: That's what she does.
[00:50:13] Speaker B: You think this bothers me? And then she just shoves her thumbs.
[00:50:15] Speaker A: In his eyes, just like on evil dead one, the original where he knocks his eyes out.
[00:50:22] Speaker B: Oh, boy.
Military training taught her the eyes will always make your enemy vulnerable. And this is a gruesome full page here of just thumb to the eye.
[00:50:36] Speaker A: That's gross.
[00:50:38] Speaker B: Her coat collar is so pointy, it almost looks like she's trying to get the other one with the tip of her collar there.
[00:50:44] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:50:46] Speaker B: And then she says, quippy line, I'm doing you a favor. You'll thank me someday. And then plunges her other thumb in the other eye.
Great dramatic timing.
She's been hunting, so she knows you have to snap the back of the arrow off and push it all the way through instead of trying to pull it back out.
[00:51:04] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:51:05] Speaker B: Man, that's pretty badass. She snaps a friggin saint relic, Johnny.
[00:51:12] Speaker A: Snaps it right off.
[00:51:13] Speaker B: I have a feeling that it's not mentioned. It's not mentioned in the text, but I have a feeling that there's lots of power that has to go into destroying a saintly relic.
[00:51:22] Speaker A: I would imagine so. I mean, that was the spear that killed Jesus. Jesus had, like, metal skin.
[00:51:27] Speaker B: Canonically, he was Iron man.
[00:51:31] Speaker A: Yeah, Jesus is Iron man.
[00:51:33] Speaker B: So Robert Downey Jr. Is the savior.
[00:51:35] Speaker A: Of all and he will rise again.
[00:51:38] Speaker B: I mean, he did. He did. He had that bad died. He had that bad patch. He functionally died. He was thrown in prison for cocaine.
[00:51:47] Speaker A: Oh, I know he did. But I'm talking about Iron man because he's dead. He's going to have to rise again.
[00:51:55] Speaker B: I mean, he will.
He's just like James Bond. You can't kill him.
[00:51:58] Speaker A: So the rest, they killed both of them in the same year. Basically. They're a couple years apart.
[00:52:03] Speaker B: The rest of the scorch team joins the fray, Johnny. So it does.
[00:52:06] Speaker A: James Bond is dead, David. They killed him.
[00:52:09] Speaker B: Oh, no. Why did they do that?
[00:52:12] Speaker A: Did you not know that?
[00:52:13] Speaker B: No, I didn't know.
[00:52:14] Speaker A: Oh, really?
[00:52:15] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:52:15] Speaker A: Oh, he died in the newest movie. Oh, no. I spoiled it for you.
[00:52:18] Speaker B: Well, I probably wasn't going to watch it anyway. The rest of the scorched team joins Johnny and we get the opening reading about the new Bible. The new Bible of the scorched. They're going to print up a copy of it and put it in every one of those christian bookstores you see in the mall.
But those scriptures cannot be written yet, Johnny, because the day is not yet finished. So it's one of those you got to wait till the end of the battle to write stuff down. Because imagine being in the middle of the battle just trying to write stuff down. It would be wild. Be wild. And Jessica priest then decides, you know what? I'm not going to leave Senator Terminus alive. I'm just going to stab him through the head with this half a long Gino. She just gives his long ginos back to him.
[00:53:01] Speaker A: Johnny gives it right back to him.
[00:53:03] Speaker B: Right back to him. And then we cut to monolith holding, like, a demon face in his hand.
[00:53:11] Speaker A: It's like melting and medieval.
[00:53:13] Speaker B: Hacking up a carcass. Oh, boy. It is great. And then Jessica priest trying to do.
Should I see the Urs in it? As followers have left Terminus'hives, are pulling back, too. And monolith. Monolith asks if she's okay. And she says, far from it. And Al's like, actually, I think what he's saying.
[00:53:37] Speaker A: Jessica's like, you ready to lead him again?
[00:53:39] Speaker B: She says, nah, fuck this team. She says, this is your bed. You lay in it. I got my own team now, motherfucker. Her team is the heap.
[00:53:49] Speaker A: Heap and Kingslayer.
[00:53:50] Speaker B: The Kingslayer. Look at him. Look at that boy. Look at him going.
[00:53:54] Speaker A: It's Simon. He's looking like a teenager.
[00:53:57] Speaker B: Yeah, he is. He's growing up. They grow up so fast, Johnny.
[00:54:01] Speaker A: They do. They really?
[00:54:03] Speaker B: Yep. And Al's like, I can't let you do this. Jessica Priest is like, you got it? Or else Wanda's soul go bye bye. You don't want that to happen.
[00:54:12] Speaker A: She turns back into regular Jessica with her short hair.
[00:54:18] Speaker B: And then she gives a little brief talking about what Gaia did with Wanda's soul. So if he wants Wanda's soul back, they're going to have to play nice together. But Gaia really doesn't want Al to live. So I guess she's hoping that Al will sacrifice himself to free Wanda so that way Gaia can get spawned off the then. And then Al is like, you can't do this, Jessica. She's like, stop me.
[00:54:44] Speaker A: And Mona looks like I can stop you. She's like, no.
[00:54:47] Speaker B: You know, you forget, Mother Gaia is basically mother Earth. You think Earth would be here without the earth, mutter the Earth mudder. Earth mother. And then she basically just does.
[00:55:00] Speaker A: Hello, Mudda. Hello, Father.
[00:55:02] Speaker B: Speaking of camp songs, speaking of Dr. Demento.
[00:55:05] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:55:06] Speaker B: Then we get heap just hulks the ground. And it basically makes, like, the little ninja smokes that Batman uses. And it knocks everybody down. And then when the scorched stand up, the army of Gaia is gone and.
[00:55:23] Speaker A: Disappeared along with Spawn.
[00:55:25] Speaker B: As the smoke clears, Jessica Priest is gone. Her new teammates as well. And spawn.
[00:55:31] Speaker A: I don't think this is over.
[00:55:33] Speaker B: In truth, the true fight has yet to begin.
And then. Scorched skull.
[00:55:39] Speaker A: Scorched skull.
[00:55:40] Speaker B: So that's the end of that episode, that's the end of Senator Terminus. That's the end of Sean Lewis's run. Pretty dope.
[00:55:46] Speaker A: But we got one last little thing. We got a little mailbag.
[00:55:49] Speaker B: We got a little mailbag in the spawning grounds.
[00:55:52] Speaker A: We have a mailbag.
[00:55:53] Speaker B: We got Dan Fluger. Got a tattoo of meatball head spawn with the shoelace up the middle of it.
[00:56:01] Speaker A: And it's pretty cool.
[00:56:03] Speaker B: Absolutely dope. We get another person asking questions about non main spawn characters getting their own books. And Thomas Healy's like, just you wait.
Just you wait. And then we get anonymous sending in a pretty dope drawing of Spawn. Look at that.
[00:56:22] Speaker A: Anonymous. That's funny.
[00:56:24] Speaker B: Good. It's good. It's a good drawing. Good art. Hell, yeah. Fan art.
[00:56:28] Speaker A: Good art.
[00:56:29] Speaker B: Need more Spawn's universe, Johnny. I know I do.
[00:56:32] Speaker A: Always.
[00:56:33] Speaker B: And the image classics that we always get. And then, whoa. We get a new advertisement on the toy page on the very back, Johnny. It's for Demon Slayer, which isn't even a spawn property.
[00:56:45] Speaker A: I don't even know what demon Slayer is.
[00:56:47] Speaker B: It's an anime about a guy who goes around and kills.
Oh, it is probably as close as an anime can get to being spawned without actually being spawn. I highly recommend it. It is very good because the main character of the show, spoilers for the very first episode, he goes to market to sell a whole bunch of stuff for his family. And then when he gets back, his entire family has been killed by demons, except for his sister, who has been turned into a demon. But yet she still retains her human sympathies and memories. And so he carries her around and learns how to kill demons. So that way he can try to cure her. And so he just, like, wanders around and kills demons. It's great. It's a good time. It's very good. And that's scorch number 22, Johnny.
[00:57:43] Speaker A: That's scorch 22. That's what you need to do.
[00:57:46] Speaker B: So what you need to do?
Well, Johnny, I might be surrounded by them, but I don't know if I've given them any ratings yet. We got to rate these puppies.
[00:58:01] Speaker A: It's time to rate the puppies.
[00:58:04] Speaker B: So, spawn 325, Johnny, we've got this good book. It's a good book. It's a good book. The art is awesome. The story is awesome.
[00:58:15] Speaker A: I love this one.
[00:58:16] Speaker B: It doesn't have that sort of kind of, like, slack ##ness that a lot of first issues of an arc have where there's not a whole bunch of just running tires to run tires like everything has a point. And being where we are, we know where everything goes. So it's just wonderful to come back and see where everything started.
[00:58:34] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:58:35] Speaker B: I am going to give this four straps on a gladiator sandal. Even though he only has three of them, because I would need a fourth one to keep him from falling down. So four gladiator sandal straps, Johnny. It's a good one. It's a real good one.
[00:58:49] Speaker A: I'm going to give it four and a half demon hearts. Because they found those demons that had many hearts.
[00:58:56] Speaker B: Nice.
[00:58:57] Speaker A: I just thought it was a great issue. It's just a lot of fun. And you get a lot of spawns at the end. What's not the love?
[00:59:03] Speaker B: What's not the love? You get great fashion from Carla Barberry. You get fucking great spawns from Carla Barberry. We get fucking gumshoe spawn. Yeah, it's good.
Definitely worth a reread. If you've fallen off of spawn or want to come back on spawn, just read 325. It's great. It's great. You could read it by itself and you won't know what's happening. But hey, that's fine. It's still fun.
[00:59:32] Speaker A: Still fun.
[00:59:33] Speaker B: I don't really think there's much to need to know. You just need to know that there's some guys from hell and then there's some bad guys. They got to fight. I think you can get it just fine.
[00:59:42] Speaker A: Yeah, I think so, too. I agree. I think it's a good. This is like kind of what got me grooving along. I started buying a few issues before this, but this is where it really starts to pick.
[00:59:52] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. The writing is amazing. No. No shade to the Todd father. But Rory McConnell is a better writer. That kind of helps a little bit.
[01:00:03] Speaker A: True.
[01:00:03] Speaker B: That sure does.
[01:00:05] Speaker A: Tod McFarland's got many talents.
[01:00:07] Speaker B: Yes, he does. But different people have different talents.
[01:00:12] Speaker A: It happens exactly at different levels.
[01:00:14] Speaker B: Then we got this scorched 22. It's a very good one. The last Sean Lewis scorched we got going. It was absolutely incredible.
[01:00:24] Speaker A: It's a lot of fun. It's just wacky and epic and just a lot of good stuff.
[01:00:29] Speaker B: Give a nice, satisfying ending to our least favorite senator of all time, Senator Terminus. Some dope artwork, some cool sort of team dynamics going on. And just a hell of good time. Yeah.
I'm going to have to get this five melty demon faces, Johnny. Because it's pretty face meltingly good. It's great. It's a fun time.
[01:00:55] Speaker A: I'm gonna give it five. Classic Jessica priest shooting Alphabet forehead. Hell yeah. Right there.
[01:01:03] Speaker B: Right there. It's like, right good. That's good. It's a good. A good send off for Mr. Sean Lewis. You got full fives from both of us.
[01:01:11] Speaker A: I agree.
[01:01:12] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, you know how we like to beg and plead and basically bribe people to send us emails.
[01:01:21] Speaker A: Yes.
[01:01:21] Speaker B: I think it may have worked.
We got an email.
[01:01:28] Speaker A: Yay.
We got an email from our friend Mark Zovak, who I got to meet at Spongon, and we're going to read it. It's time for a little mailbag. It's time for spawning regrounds.
So we got an email from Mark in a hilarious turn of events. The title is give me a sticker, which is great.
[01:02:09] Speaker B: Yes.
[01:02:10] Speaker A: But it says, greetings, john and David. I didn't get a chance to write you last week in regards to spawn con, so I will keep it brief. When I first heard about it, I was really excited, but I didn't have high expectations for it. I told my wife I really wanted to go, and she made it happen. I figured it's either going, that's a good partner.
I figured it's either going to be bust or it's going to be awesome. Either way, I figured I'd be able to say that I went to the first one and or the last one. That's hilarious. The con far exceeded my expectations. I was blown away by what they were able to put together. It was very intimate setting, full of nothing but spawn. It's true. It was awesome to be able to have one on one time with artists to get to talk to them. I had the vip pass and was there from open to close both days. And I still didn't make it to all the tables. I only got autographs of people that I stopped and talked to. I just realized I didn't get John's. Oh, well, maybe next year. Oh, you don't need my autograph.
My wife and I had an amazing time at Sponcon. And when it was sad, when it was over, the team that put it together knocked out of the park. We did not eat at Ruby Tuesdays. Okay, well, there you go. That's the important part. We travel. We try to eat at local restaurants in the area only. I'm really glad they're putting a sponk on year two and plan on attending. So much for keeping it brief. Lol. I want to let you know that I really enjoy your show. You're doing a fantastic job giving us your take on old Spawny. How many, if any, of the new titles do you plan on putting into rotation for the show? I currently only read Gunslinger, but plan on definitely reading the new one. I also plan to get all the new titles and read them from the beginning to see if the story is any good. If not, I'll just collect them.
You don't need to read this on your podcast or send me a sticker for that matter. I got a couple at Spawn Con. You could give the gunslinger fan page a shout out though. I'm an admin over there. Once we reach 500 followers, I plan to do a gunslinger related giveaway, and we are slowly getting there. Keep on spawning and may the scorch be with you. Best regards, tiny spawn Mark Z.
[01:03:58] Speaker B: Hell, that's awesome. Hell yeah. And the gunslinger fan page he is referring to is on ye old Facebook and it is called Gunslinger Spawn fans and it's right there on the tin. Johnny, you show up and there's people just talking about gunslinger Spawn showing pictures of Spawn. Mark himself has a photo of some pencils from issue two. And let me tell you, Johnny, it is just a zoomed in focus on a tall hat. And it is wonderful.
It is wonderful.
[01:04:35] Speaker A: That's awesome.
[01:04:36] Speaker B: It's good. It's just a whole bunch of good stuff. If you like gunslinger Spawn and you're on Facebook still, go gunslinger Spawn fans.
[01:04:42] Speaker A: Go join.
[01:04:43] Speaker B: They are currently at 682 members. So I guess that means a gunslinger spawn giveaway will be happening soon.
[01:04:52] Speaker A: Man, must have blown up quickly.
[01:04:54] Speaker B: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. This makes me so happy. I love getting emails. And Johnny, I think I have a solution for old Mark here. You should sign the back of a sticker. Specifically the sticker.
[01:05:09] Speaker A: I like that.
[01:05:10] Speaker B: Maybe if we're feeling sassy, we'll get both of us to sign it.
Johnny's will be the legible one.
[01:05:17] Speaker A: Oh, no, mine's not legible. Not.
[01:05:20] Speaker B: Mine's not legible at all. Nope. But you know what? It doesn't matter. Yeah. Well, thanks, Mark, for being our friend and sending us an email. And speaking of friends, we really appreciate it. Yes, we've got some friends on Instagram that we like to let people know about. And this week, a friend named Vincent. And Vincent is a dope artist, and you got to go see his art. And Vincent is at VAR underscore, underscore, underscore art. If you try VAR underscore art, you're going to get nothing. If you try VAR underscore, underscore art, you're going to get a russian guy named Vargulovich. Who hasn't posted since 2016. But, hey, maybe follow too. Maybe if we can get this guy some more friends, that would be great too. But no, you want VAR. Underscore. Underscore. Underscore art. It's beautiful stuff. It's great. He's got everything. Everything. He's an aspiring comic book artist, and he just draws. He just draws. And it's all good shit. There's, like, some Batman. There's some spawn. There's some that. Who else is there? There's lots of stuff. It's also this. Johnny, there is some fucking dark tower artwork right there. It is.
[01:06:43] Speaker A: Oh, nice.
[01:06:45] Speaker B: It is Roland Deschane standing in the field of roses, walking up toward the tower. Holy shit.
[01:06:51] Speaker A: I would be looking at it, but my phone died.
[01:06:54] Speaker B: Oh, no. Well, at least we got the email out before it died.
Yep. It's great shit. Go see our friend Vincent. He does good stuff. Speaking of good stuff on Instagram, while you're over there, go see Brian. He does our music. Brian, underscore voyals, underscore 27. Our show would not sound anywhere as good without Brian.
[01:07:13] Speaker A: It would not. We got to hear that sweet, sweet, respawning reground song with the type. Send us more emails so we can get that.
[01:07:21] Speaker B: Yeah, so great. So great.
[01:07:24] Speaker A: We're over there on Instagram at regarding spawn pod. Yes, we are posting fun stuff, posting videos, posting pickups.
[01:07:32] Speaker B: Yeah, pickups. We got random stuff. Posters, pictures of our stickers that we slap around town occasionally. So if you ever find yourself in Chicago and you're like, I want to see a sticker in the wild, you can maybe find where we've slapped them.
[01:07:47] Speaker A: Like David said, he could use them to trail us from our work to our home just by following the respawn stickers.
[01:07:55] Speaker B: Oh, Boy.
[01:07:56] Speaker A: So you can come dox us.
[01:07:58] Speaker B: So as long as you aren't Jake Gyllenhaal from the movie Zodiac, please feel free to come look at them. But Jake Gyllenhaal from Zodiac, you stay the fuck away from our respawn stickers because we don't need you. Crazy. Actually following us here, you seemed like a nice guy, but you were a little bit obsessive. You were mean to your wife. Do it, damn it. Do you know if you would like to hear the mailbag song again, send us an
[email protected]. We love to receive them. We've got that promotion going on. You send us an email, not only does Johnny read it, we'll send you a sticker.
It'll be great.
[01:08:35] Speaker A: Just make sure to put in your address in the email and we'll send you a sticker. That's right.
[01:08:40] Speaker B: Absolutely.
And, Johnny, do you have a prompt to try to tickle the brain juices of people wanting to get something out there to us?
[01:08:49] Speaker A: Yes, I was wondering. So we've got four spawns that were presented by Carlo Barberia in this 325. We've got Centurion spawn, revolutionary war spawn. Like mage Spawn, and gumstream spawn or spawn noir. And I was wondering, which of those four would you like to see as an action figure? I'm of course going to say gumshoe spawn, obviously, because he's got absolutely gumshoe spawn. Yeah, but I can see all of them working out pretty well. It's a good action figure.
[01:09:19] Speaker B: Yeah, they would be. That Centurion would be great for a kickstarter. So that way it could have all that detail. Because you open up this issue and you look at that detail and boy, howdy. Boy, howdy. That would be great.
[01:09:30] Speaker A: They've got this new technology. I don't know if it's new, but they just started using it. In the dune figures that are coming out. I saw Tod McFarland talking about it. And they have like these capes that have wires in them. So you can. It looks like they're billowing. And they can use that technology on. If they made a Centurion spawn, they could use that on his cape. That would be sweet.
[01:09:48] Speaker B: That would be dope. That would be dope. Well, yeah, Johnny, speaking of dope, what would you think about reading some more spawn in a week. And then talking about it again?
[01:09:57] Speaker A: I think that'd be pretty dope.
[01:09:59] Speaker B: Hell, yeah. Hell, yeah. So what are you thinking about? Next week we're going to do another main title, double main title show. It's just going to happen to be spawn 326. And spawn 346. So we got a couple of sixes there.
[01:10:18] Speaker A: Just need one more.
[01:10:19] Speaker B: Too bad. It will be very good. So that again, spawn 326. Spawn 346. Read them, come back. Listen to us. Talk to them. Let us know if you like our ratings on them. That's fine. That'll be good. Don't forget to like us.
Subscribe to us, rate us. Talk to your friends about us. Tell your coworkers. Have your mom listen to them. Have your mom download them and not listen to them. Just so we get those numbers if you want. That's fine.
[01:10:44] Speaker A: Yeah, get those numbers up. That's fine with me.
[01:10:47] Speaker B: Moms are accommodating in that way. So we love you. And happy 69th episode, everybody. It's been nice.
It's been wonderful. Nice.
And, Johnny, may the scorched be with you.
[01:11:04] Speaker A: And also with you, David.
[01:11:07] Speaker B: Hell, yeah.
[01:11:08] Speaker A: Nice.
[01:11:14] Speaker B: Nice.
Hearts.
And many hearts had father demon man heart.
