Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Well, well, well. I see at least two. No, three of the seven deadly sins happening.
Imp.
[00:00:32] Speaker B: Foreign.
[00:00:39] Speaker A: And welcome to the Malibu. This is regarding Spawn, Russia's best spawn podcast. Russia's favorite spawn podcast.
I'm your co host, John Fisher.
[00:00:50] Speaker B: And I'm your co host, David Williams. And at least long ago, long ago Russia, not current day Russia. I don't know.
[00:00:57] Speaker A: Yeah, we're not trying to be political here. Where this was. The issue is about Russia.
[00:01:01] Speaker B: Russia.
[00:01:02] Speaker A: I mean, I know we might have listeners in Russia. Check it out.
[00:01:04] Speaker B: Hold on, hold on. We have. We do have. I will give you a number of the exact number of people we have in all time had listen in Russia. We have had 13 listens in Russia.
[00:01:15] Speaker A: Yeah, 13 listens.
[00:01:18] Speaker B: Nice, nice.
[00:01:20] Speaker A: Okay, so we are. Maybe we are. I don't know, probably spotography's got like 25.
[00:01:25] Speaker B: So we could call them up. How many. How many you got?
[00:01:28] Speaker A: How many? How many Russians you got? Are you the world's best Russian spawn podcast? No, we're talking Russia because we're rushing to this. We've been rushing around reading this issue about Russia.
[00:01:39] Speaker B: Yeah, about. About one.
One little bitty guy. One little bitty guy that nobody's ever heard of.
I've heard of him named Putin. His name's Putin, Johnny.
[00:01:52] Speaker A: It's Rasputin.
[00:01:53] Speaker B: Rasputin.
[00:01:55] Speaker A: Rasputin.
Wait, so how did the image get rights to 20th Century Fox if Rasputin. He's just made up for that movie.
[00:02:03] Speaker B: Christopher Lee. Yeah, well, there's no. There's no bar.
[00:02:05] Speaker A: Christopher Lloyd.
[00:02:07] Speaker B: Fuck. I get my old ass Christopher's mixed up. Christopher Lee. Christopher Lee is actually the. The better old ass Christopher since he fucking was a Nazi hunter and he's.
[00:02:18] Speaker A: Not and he does, like, do medals.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: And like, he was a direct descendant of Charlemagne.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: Friends with JR Tolkien.
[00:02:28] Speaker B: What a fascinating individual, man. I would have loved to have gotten a chance to talk to Christopher Lee, but he would have probably spent the whole time being like, the fuck is wrong with this kid?
What are. What are you doing? Go outside.
[00:02:43] Speaker A: When George came to me and said, I will play Count Dooku, I said, I will do it.
[00:02:50] Speaker B: Oh, man.
[00:02:51] Speaker A: I like how when George Lucas came up with Chris release character's name most famous for playing Count Dracula, he literally just changed like four letters.
You ever think about that?
[00:03:02] Speaker B: Like. Like, I come to suck your force.
[00:03:06] Speaker A: Yeah. It's like he had Count Dracula written on a piece of paper. Spilled coffee on it. It's all Count D. And he was like, count Doo Doo. No, that's too. That's Too bad, Count Dooku.
[00:03:18] Speaker B: Not as bad as Doo Doo, Jenny.
[00:03:20] Speaker A: It's Dooku.
[00:03:23] Speaker B: Oh man. That's just.
[00:03:24] Speaker A: I'm sure Christopher Lee's played Rasputin at some point, I imagine in his long story career.
[00:03:29] Speaker B: I was. I would assume so.
I mean, how many. How many Hammer films was he in? He has to have been in one of them there.
[00:03:37] Speaker A: Yeah, he had to have been Rasputin in that, man.
[00:03:40] Speaker B: Amazing. He's. He was like the.
The original Nicholas Cage. Only he didn't do it because he bankrupted himself by buying dinosaur bones. He was just like, I must work. I will do the work.
[00:03:53] Speaker A: I will do the work.
Yeah, we're talking Rasputin because we are talking violator number four today.
[00:04:02] Speaker B: And why are we doing that, Johnny?
[00:04:04] Speaker A: Because we are respawn where each week we bring you two issues responds universe. Except when we don't.
This is a don't because we only have one because it's a big beefy violator issue. These big old violator issues.
[00:04:16] Speaker B: Like you could. If you're picking up something and you need to like kill a fly or something, this will. I mean, it'll get your book all nasty, but this.
[00:04:23] Speaker A: Oh, you. You can get kill.
[00:04:24] Speaker B: You'll never. You'll get like four or five of them in one shot. It's.
[00:04:28] Speaker A: You could kill a weta with that.
A weta. You know, weta is. It's like a giant New Zealand bug.
[00:04:34] Speaker B: Oh, man. No, I don't. It sounds frightening though, because they're big. New Zealand bugs are kind of big Australian bugs kind of big.
[00:04:43] Speaker A: Big bugs. Big bugs are scary.
[00:04:45] Speaker B: It's big bug land.
[00:04:47] Speaker A: That's got the heebie jeebies thinking about big bugs.
[00:04:50] Speaker B: Went to the. My mom and my sister were in town recently and we went to the Shedd Aquarium and they've got a. They've got a lot of insects at the Shedd Aquarium.
[00:04:58] Speaker A: Really?
[00:04:59] Speaker B: Yeah, they got like a big. A big Peruvian cockroach. It was like 4 inches long. It was crazy.
[00:05:05] Speaker A: That's wild big.
[00:05:07] Speaker B: That. My. My least favorite bug in the world, the centipede. They had one of those big giant centipedes.
It's not that there's too many legs, it's that all of the legs are pointy sharp and they've got those giant pincers and it's just like. Please, sir, leave me alone.
[00:05:23] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't want to see you give me. Give me the heebie jeebies.
[00:05:26] Speaker B: Give me that tarantula any day.
Yeah, that's one of the that's one of the best parts about gardening, Johnny, is it gives me a chance to find cool bugs to take pictures of to show my friends.
[00:05:36] Speaker A: You never show me a picture of a bug.
[00:05:37] Speaker B: You want me to show you some pictures of bugs?
[00:05:39] Speaker A: Am I not a friend?
[00:05:41] Speaker B: I will start put. Including you.
[00:05:43] Speaker A: No, I don't like bugs.
[00:05:45] Speaker B: The problem is I have sunflowers right now that are attracting like these gigantic grasshoppers. And I want to show everybody but the group I usually share it to. I know one friend has a major phobia of grasshoppers. So I can't do it.
[00:05:58] Speaker A: It was a great grasshopper.
That's when the Lord came upon a great grasshopper.
[00:06:03] Speaker B: Great grasshopper. What was the name of the grasshopper? And James and the Giant peach. Oh, it's just Mr. Grasshopper, wasn't it?
[00:06:07] Speaker A: Mr. Grasshopper.
[00:06:08] Speaker B: Mr. Grasshopper.
[00:06:09] Speaker A: Richard Dreyfus.
[00:06:11] Speaker B: Really? Oh, man.
[00:06:12] Speaker A: Yeah, I think it was. Richard Dris played him.
[00:06:14] Speaker B: I gotta watch that movie again. It was good.
[00:06:15] Speaker A: No, he didn't play Gri. He played Centipede. He played like that, centipedes. Speaking of centipedes, Mr. Grasshopper's probably some British guy.
[00:06:24] Speaker B: Oh, man.
Mr. Glowworm is probably. Let's see who played.
[00:06:29] Speaker A: He's only in one part.
He just hangs up there and it's the light.
[00:06:34] Speaker B: He's definitely. He's definitely like. Who I would be is just like. Please stop.
Simon Callow as Mr. Grasshopper. Richard Dreyfus is Mr. Centipede. Jeff Bennett is Mr. Centipede. Singing voice.
Jane Levies as Ms. Ladybug. Susan Sarandon is Ms. Spider. David Theldwis.
[00:06:53] Speaker A: No comment.
[00:06:54] Speaker B: None needs to be said. Johnny. I think we've already said it before.
Oh, no.
Oh, I accidentally turned off my second monitor. Now I gotta wait for it to boot back up.
[00:07:05] Speaker A: You got so excited thinking about Ms. Spider that your erection turned off your fucking computer.
[00:07:11] Speaker B: Who's the naughty boy now? I guess that'd still be me, wouldn't it?
[00:07:15] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:07:16] Speaker B: David Thelvis is Mr. Earthworm. Miriam Marcos is Mrs. Glowworm. And Sally Stevens is Mrs. Glowworm. Singing voice. Okay, Very nice. It's a good movie.
[00:07:27] Speaker A: David Thewlis, he played Lupin in Harry Potter and he was.
He's an island of Dr. Moreau.
[00:07:34] Speaker B: Did he also play a wolf in island of Dr. Moreau? A wolf man?
[00:07:39] Speaker A: No, he was just the regular man.
[00:07:40] Speaker B: But wasn't. Isn't the island of Dr. Moreau where he's turning people into animals?
Yeah, okay, okay.
[00:07:47] Speaker A: But he's just the regular man. He's the regular man that he's like the everyman.
[00:07:50] Speaker B: Oh, okay, okay.
[00:07:51] Speaker A: That stumbles across the island. David Thewless. You know, even if you saw him, he's very, like, kind of like twee. Nerdy looking.
[00:07:57] Speaker B: Yeah, I, I, Yeah, I'm looking at it right here. All right.
[00:08:00] Speaker A: You see that guy? I've seen that guy.
[00:08:02] Speaker B: Yeah, I seen that guy.
Hey, I seen that guy.
Why are we.
[00:08:08] Speaker A: Why are we talking about James the giant peach, the weta. Because we're gonna smash a giant bug with this Gian.
[00:08:18] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:08:18] Speaker A: Violator number four.
[00:08:20] Speaker B: Yeah. We'll violate that bug.
Living existence.
[00:08:27] Speaker A: Yes, we will, as the Violator violates many people's living existence in this book.
[00:08:33] Speaker B: I think the Violator would absolutely approve of just some bug guts smashed all over the covers.
[00:08:38] Speaker A: Oh, he'd love it. It would fit perfectly.
[00:08:40] Speaker B: It would fit perfectly. It would be a snack. Yeah, it would fit perfectly on these covers, Johnny, that we need to cover.
[00:08:47] Speaker A: It's time to cover the covers.
[00:08:48] Speaker B: Yeah. What cover do you have?
[00:08:51] Speaker A: I have the A cover.
[00:08:52] Speaker B: Ooh, I also have the A cover by Gianrinko Bonacoursi.
[00:08:59] Speaker A: Perfect.
[00:09:00] Speaker B: Yeah, we practiced that.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: Nice.
Yeah.
The artist. The interior artist as well.
[00:09:07] Speaker B: Yes, indeed. I love it when the interior artists do the covers.
And it's. Johnny, we got a. We got a. The COVID of the book is very much exactly what happens in the book.
[00:09:18] Speaker A: For once.
[00:09:19] Speaker B: For once we got a. We got a Russian. Oh, what's that word? A Russian Orthodox church on fire.
We got a beardy man with some, like, Lovecraftian tentacles coming out of his body.
And then we got the Violator just hanging out on above all of it.
[00:09:39] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:09:39] Speaker B: Kind of looks like it's happening in his mouth, right?
[00:09:43] Speaker A: Well, it's like. Yeah, the horns are popping out of his chest.
[00:09:46] Speaker B: There's like a hand coming out of the mouth.
Yeah, it's. It's a good cover.
[00:09:52] Speaker A: Good cover.
[00:09:53] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, it's a real good cover. Did you know that there's also a second cover?
[00:09:58] Speaker A: You know, I did.
[00:09:59] Speaker B: I don't think they had this one. There's a David Mack cover, and David Mack is.
People love a David Mac.
Looking at this cover, Johnny, it's pretty easy to see why people love a David Mack. It's creepy as hell. Absolutely.
[00:10:15] Speaker A: Oh, it's cool. Yeah, it's like, it's got that white.
[00:10:18] Speaker B: Background, and then it's also got like a, Like a spawn type hell beast hand.
And then within the hands are pictures of skulls. Rasputin himself and a little fat clown face in the Background there.
[00:10:33] Speaker A: Yeah, that was pretty cool.
[00:10:35] Speaker B: Yeah, it's real creepy. They always get. They always get David Mack for the creepiest comic books.
[00:10:40] Speaker A: So is that true?
[00:10:42] Speaker B: I would be. I would not be surprised if there was a nice house on the lake cover or two done by David Mack.
[00:10:49] Speaker A: Yeah, that's like one. One person that does the main covers, but they always have a B cover. So I'm sure he probably has done some.
[00:10:54] Speaker B: Probably. That's the classic. The classic image of Rasputin there.
The very.
Like the photograph of him with his hand up, kind of maybe doing this sign of the cross. I don't know if they do the sign of the cross in the Russian Orthodox, but I'm going to assume so.
Maybe they have to give it the two extra crosses.
[00:11:16] Speaker A: Do all of it.
[00:11:18] Speaker B: You got to do all of it. You got to start with an onion bulb.
[00:11:24] Speaker A: Wow, that's an intense crossing yourself.
[00:11:27] Speaker B: That's a.
Well, the more you have the people do, the less time they have to think about anything other than what you're telling them, Johnny.
[00:11:33] Speaker A: So let's have them have idle hands of the devil's work.
[00:11:37] Speaker B: Yep.
I just noticed that there's a mistake on this cover, Johnny.
[00:11:42] Speaker A: What's that?
[00:11:43] Speaker B: So if you look right here at the teeth, it looks like they accidentally highlighted a little section and then plopped it over like a. Like a fraction of an inch.
[00:11:55] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, they did.
[00:11:56] Speaker B: It was just like one of the teeth of the little teeth. It's just a pink.
It's glitching, Johnny. It's glitching.
[00:12:03] Speaker A: It's AI. I'm kidding. It's not. He has the correct number of fingers.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: For now.
[00:12:10] Speaker A: For now.
[00:12:13] Speaker B: Yeah. No.
Yeah.
[00:12:14] Speaker A: David made me get up at 5 o' clock in the morning to record this episode.
[00:12:18] Speaker B: I am the taskmaster. Yeah, Johnny, get on it.
[00:12:22] Speaker A: It's not really five, it's seven.
[00:12:25] Speaker B: But you had to wake up at five to get ready for seven.
[00:12:27] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, it takes me two hours to get ready for this podcast.
[00:12:30] Speaker B: It takes me two hours to get ready.
[00:12:31] Speaker A: Just in general, I read the issue 10 times.
[00:12:35] Speaker B: You can read the issue 10 times in two hours. Geez, that's quick.
This. This one does move. It does move.
[00:12:41] Speaker A: Once you read it three times, it's just.
[00:12:42] Speaker B: It's easy after that, your eyes just kind of like.
Okay.
[00:12:46] Speaker A: You basically have it memorized.
[00:12:48] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:12:49] Speaker A: Well, Johnny, you know you play the chicken morning song, though.
You know I'm talking about.
[00:12:57] Speaker B: Didn't they use that for like a gas station commercial?
[00:13:00] Speaker A: Just like the morning song.
[00:13:01] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:13:05] Speaker A: I'm doing a bad job of it. Just cut it in.
[00:13:09] Speaker B: It's. It's the. The song that they use on the.
It's always like a. A rural or pastoral sunrise, not a city sunrise. Cuz a city of sunrise has to have Rhapsody and D in it. Or Rhapsody and Blue. Rhapsody and Blue in it.
[00:13:24] Speaker A: Uhhuh.
Yeah. And usually there's a chicken. That's why I called it the chicken song.
[00:13:28] Speaker B: Yeah, there's always a chicken. We'll find something. Watch. We won't be able to find anything. We can use this song. It's everywhere. Nowhere.
[00:13:37] Speaker A: So I think it's just called the Morning Song. Or if you looked at the morning song, it pops up.
[00:13:41] Speaker B: Sure. Hey Johnny, those are some nice new headphones.
[00:13:44] Speaker A: No, they're not.
[00:13:46] Speaker B: They look nice from here. You could have lied.
[00:13:48] Speaker A: It's like, it's. These are my Xbox headphones.
[00:13:53] Speaker B: Nice.
So they're very used to.
[00:13:57] Speaker A: I remember they're not by. They're not new. I've had them usually for my Xbox. Usually I'm yelling slurs into them at people online.
[00:14:05] Speaker B: Now you can just yell hateful things with your buddy David in them.
[00:14:08] Speaker A: Yep, that's the plan.
No, the microphone's not.
[00:14:11] Speaker B: Well, that's. That's the mic that's not hooked up to the recording. So everything you don't hear?
[00:14:16] Speaker A: No, no, I'm still recording on my regular mic.
[00:14:22] Speaker B: It's a world. What a world we live in where you can choose your mic at random.
[00:14:25] Speaker A: Yeah. Those headphones I got like after our second episode disintegrated the other day.
[00:14:29] Speaker B: Yeah, these ones, the ones I have that I've been using the whole time. The.
The cable coating is like the. The rubber is starting to slough off and they're gonna short pretty quickly.
[00:14:41] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. I mean I got them for like. It was funny. I remember I went and got to Target and got them and like everyone was so confused because they were supposed to be like 60 bucks. They were like $15.
[00:14:50] Speaker B: Nice.
[00:14:50] Speaker A: They rang up as 15. Everyone was like scratching their head. They're like, I guess we'll sell it to you.
[00:14:54] Speaker B: And I was like, okay, man, I wish Benny's worked that way. I grabbed a bottle of. It was like a $200 bottle of bourbon. And the tag on the shelf said $65. And they refused to let me have it for $65. They said the lowest they could go is 150. And I said, absolutely not. No thank you.
No thank you, motherfuckers. False.
[00:15:17] Speaker A: 65 on the tag.
[00:15:19] Speaker B: It said 65 on the tag. And like every. Everybody immediately was like, oh, no, that is not right.
[00:15:26] Speaker A: What bourbon was it?
[00:15:27] Speaker B: I don't even remember.
[00:15:28] Speaker A: You're so mad you forgot.
[00:15:30] Speaker B: Yeah, well, I've just tried too many that they all kind of blur. I don't like to have the same thing twice, Johnny. You know that.
[00:15:37] Speaker A: I know that for sure.
[00:15:38] Speaker B: For sure.
I do. I will have this opening of the popping open of the covers, though. I can never. I can never resist a credit.
[00:15:49] Speaker A: We love the credits. We gotta give credit where credit is due.
[00:15:51] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah, we do.
[00:15:54] Speaker A: Since you know how to pronounce the artist, why don't you take this one, David?
[00:15:58] Speaker B: Sure, sure. Why not? So first up, we got script plot.
Can't say plot. We've got script plot by Marco.
We have script plot by Marc Andrako.
We've got art by Gianrico Bonacorsi. We've got color by DC Alonso, lettering by and world design.
We done covered the covers. Todd McFarlane is the creative director and Thomas Healy is the editor in chief.
Violator created by Todd McFarlane. Can't forget that.
[00:16:29] Speaker A: Can't forget it.
[00:16:30] Speaker B: Can't forget it.
Previously in Violator, Gloriana reunites with their soul buddy, the Violator. The life of the underworld. Party angels are having their halos polished by hailspawns. And humans are just here for the dragon drama. And flavor, extra period.
Gotta get protein from somewhere.
[00:16:50] Speaker A: Maybe it's supposed to be. It's either short ellipses or a long period.
One of the two.
[00:16:56] Speaker B: I definitely didn't read that in a sassy enough voice.
It needs a little sass. I like the soul buddy because they were soulmates and that was just a soul buddy.
[00:17:06] Speaker A: Soul buddy.
[00:17:06] Speaker B: Hey, soul buddy. Hey there, Mr. Violator in the comic book.
[00:17:13] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:17:14] Speaker B: I actually did way better at that than I thought I was going to.
[00:17:17] Speaker A: It's not bad.
[00:17:18] Speaker B: Nice, Nice. Well, not bad. Johnny. We got to start on a bad. We start on a bad guy in Russia, 1903. It's just the violator.
[00:17:27] Speaker A: It's a violator in a human skin.
[00:17:29] Speaker B: He's got. He looks like. Like that Edgar Bug.
Edgar suit.
[00:17:34] Speaker A: Men in Black. Yes, he does.
[00:17:35] Speaker B: But he's about to ask for a cup of sugar. Water more.
[00:17:39] Speaker A: Are you sure?
[00:17:40] Speaker B: Water more.
[00:17:43] Speaker A: Yeah, his skin's just hanging on. You can see his violator eyes underneath.
[00:17:47] Speaker B: This is like the sixth episode in a row that I've made a Men in Black reference. What the hell?
[00:17:52] Speaker A: It's a good movie.
[00:17:52] Speaker B: It's a good movie. It is good movie.
[00:17:54] Speaker A: Good Movie with an awful tale with terrible, awful sequels.
[00:17:59] Speaker B: Yeah.
I don't even think I've seen really much more than like 15 minutes of either of the sequels. Any of the sequels.
[00:18:05] Speaker A: And there's. And there's a spin off.
[00:18:07] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:07] Speaker A: Fourth.
[00:18:08] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, boy.
[00:18:09] Speaker A: Men in Black International.
Yeah. It's just like you can't. Can't capture that lightning twice, I guess.
[00:18:15] Speaker B: No, no.
Well, especially when they stopped using the physical goop. You got to have the goop.
I remember the summer that movie came out. I didn't see it the first couple of months it was out. And everybody was talking about how it was like the world record holder for slime in a movie up until that point. And Server was talking about how slimy it was. And then I watched it and I was like, that's not actually that much slime. But it's a lot of slime. It's a lot of slime. If you got to make it. They filled the whole dumpster with slime. So.
[00:18:46] Speaker A: A lot of slime.
[00:18:47] Speaker B: I guess I'm just a slimy boy, Jody.
Like, that could be more slime there.
[00:18:52] Speaker A: And we were childs of the 80s and 90s. Slime was cool.
[00:18:55] Speaker B: Oh, yeah.
[00:18:57] Speaker A: Thanks. Ghostbusters.
[00:18:58] Speaker B: Remember Gak?
[00:18:59] Speaker A: Yeah, of course. I love the game Fuck.
[00:19:01] Speaker B: And you could make it fart.
[00:19:03] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:04] Speaker B: That was the best part. That was the worst part about Floam is you couldn't make Floam fart.
[00:19:08] Speaker A: Floam had a good texture to it, though.
[00:19:10] Speaker B: It felt. It felt way cooler than Geck. But Geck at the fartin. That's kind of.
[00:19:14] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:15] Speaker B: For. For a seven year old boy. That's all you want?
[00:19:18] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:18] Speaker B: Give me the fart box.
[00:19:20] Speaker A: Slimes like huge now. They have like slime conventions and like people are all into it. Like different colors and different textures and.
[00:19:28] Speaker B: All that slime makes my hands feel gross. I'm never gonna go to the slime convention. Sorry, Johnny. You're on your own there.
[00:19:36] Speaker A: I remember we had one time we got some Ghostbusters slime. You like, play with your action figures with.
[00:19:43] Speaker B: Nice.
There was a Turtles playset that had like. It was basically like a waterboarding station for pouring toxic ooze on one of the turtles.
[00:19:55] Speaker A: I remember that.
[00:19:56] Speaker B: Yeah. And like a whole bunch of parents were upset because it was teaching kids about torture and sadomasochism. Sex.
[00:20:06] Speaker A: Those turtles.
[00:20:07] Speaker B: Those turtles. They're kinky boys, Johnny.
[00:20:10] Speaker A: I guess.
Are they?
[00:20:12] Speaker B: I don't know.
[00:20:14] Speaker A: I guess they're teenagers.
[00:20:16] Speaker B: According to those parents. The early 90s.
[00:20:20] Speaker A: They were rude Too. And full of crude. Mom say.
[00:20:25] Speaker B: Rude.
[00:20:25] Speaker A: Crude and tacky.
[00:20:26] Speaker B: Crude and tacky. Yeah, there we go.
[00:20:28] Speaker A: They were.
[00:20:29] Speaker B: They were. Yeah. My mom liked the turtles, though.
[00:20:32] Speaker A: Yeah, the turtle, they were. They were like, rude, but they were like, okay.
[00:20:35] Speaker B: Well, I mean, there was only one rude one.
[00:20:37] Speaker A: Yeah, they balanced it out.
[00:20:38] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:20:39] Speaker A: Because Raphael was rude but cool.
[00:20:41] Speaker B: Yeah. Michael Angel.
[00:20:43] Speaker A: It's cool but rude. It's cool but rude, right? Yeah. Cool but rude.
[00:20:46] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:20:46] Speaker A: You know, what are you gonna do? He's a bad boy.
As we learn in this issue, girls like the bad boy, apparently.
[00:20:55] Speaker B: One specific bad boy.
[00:20:57] Speaker A: Yeah.
So violators complain about how cold it is. He's living in Russia. He's frozen. It sucks.
[00:21:04] Speaker B: He's like, it's not as bad as, you know, the nuclear winter we had at the beginning of the earth there. But, you know, it's still cold. Shit gets cold.
[00:21:11] Speaker A: It's pretty cold.
[00:21:12] Speaker B: And so he's. He's just raiding some dead bodies for food and one of them has a flask frozen in their hand and he just like, oh, thank you very much.
[00:21:23] Speaker A: Rips the hand off.
[00:21:25] Speaker B: Thanks for giving me a hand, kind sir.
Ugh, gross. Then, you know, he walks by a boarded up church and he's like, ha, ha. Even the creator can't keep his churches open. Ha.
How pathetic.
[00:21:41] Speaker A: But they do have wine.
[00:21:42] Speaker B: He's like, but, you know, churches have wine. Wine has alcohol, and I love alcohol.
And he stumbles across. He stumbles across some candlelight coming out of a hole in the wall. He's like, well, what's this? Whoa, whoa, whoa.
[00:21:56] Speaker A: It's an orgy.
[00:21:57] Speaker B: He sees Johnny. He sees the opening reading at least two, no, three of the Sidly Devonists. Seven deadly sins happening. Impressive. I'm going to assume lust, adultery, and probably gluttony, since it is pride. Well, I figure five women is considered gluttonous.
[00:22:22] Speaker A: I would say so.
[00:22:24] Speaker B: But yeah, it's Rasputin just totally enmeshed with women on top of the altar.
[00:22:31] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:22:32] Speaker B: Oh, man.
And the title of sacrilege, the title of the issue is Favorite Son and Boy. It's naughty. It's very naughty.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: It's like the most sensual and sexual spawns ever gotten.
[00:22:45] Speaker B: Yeah, there's this full on butt, full on butt, full on butt. And Johnny, if I may. If I may. It's a good butt.
[00:22:53] Speaker A: It's a good butt.
[00:22:54] Speaker B: It's a good butt.
And then while Violator is seeing this happen, he hears some guys come into that, the church behind him and they're like, rasputin, You've stolen our wives.
And you know, Rasputin insults their manhood.
[00:23:10] Speaker A: Yeah. We both know they need to know. Bewitching, you flaccid fool.
[00:23:14] Speaker B: And then they throw a Molotov cocktail on him and explode the altar and their wives along with it.
[00:23:21] Speaker A: Yeah. Come on. Give me a break. To kill these poor women.
[00:23:23] Speaker B: Yeah. What jerks. And Rasputin's.
[00:23:26] Speaker A: To hell with a lot of you.
[00:23:28] Speaker B: You think this will stop me?
I am Rasputin. I am internal. Then Phylator is still just, like, watching it. He's got his little tongue out, like, licking his lips. And he's like, ah, this is awesome, but I'm gonna go. And he turns to go, there's a guy who comes up and calls him a pervert and hits him with a.
[00:23:47] Speaker A: Like, when you see.
[00:23:48] Speaker B: Pervert.
That's. That's Johnny. Every time he sees me.
[00:23:52] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what I was saying.
[00:23:54] Speaker B: He's hitting me with a pitchfork.
And this. This peasant just, like, rips the.
The dead skin mask off of Violator's face. And so he's. Violators, like, coming out of his skin suit, and he's like, you're really gonna wish you hadn't done that.
And this guy starts very quickly to wish that he hadn't done that. He gets his throat ripped out.
[00:24:17] Speaker A: Yep. It's Rick.
And the church starts to collapse under the flames.
[00:24:25] Speaker B: And then the farmers are all out there beating Rasputin up as he runs away from the rubble. And they're like, yeah, they shoot him. And they shoot him a lot.
And then we cut to Violator crawling out of the rubble of the church, being like, come on, come and get some. He's pulling an ash. He's like, come get some.
And in. In doing so, sees that they have hung the dead body of Rasputin.
[00:24:58] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:24:59] Speaker B: And he says, oh, such a shame. That one had real potential. Well, waste not, want not. He's just like, hey.
[00:25:07] Speaker A: He's like, I'm gonna make you a legend. He just jumps into his skin through his mouth.
[00:25:11] Speaker B: Yeah. And then like.
Like. Like a noodle on a spaghetti dinner. Like, slurps the horn through the mouth as the last.
Oh, it's so gross.
And then he rises as Rasputin.
[00:25:28] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:25:29] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:25:33] Speaker A: As we know, Rasputin is a historical figure who didn't die.
[00:25:37] Speaker B: No, sure he was. He was big and strong. And then in his eyes, a flaming glow. Johnny.
[00:25:43] Speaker A: Ooh, is that a poem about Rasputin?
[00:25:45] Speaker B: Oh, it's from. Technically, it's from the Bonnie M. Song Rasputin.
[00:25:49] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:25:50] Speaker B: You know that. You know that song, Johnny? It's good. It's a disco song.
[00:25:53] Speaker A: Oh, I know that song.
[00:25:54] Speaker B: Yeah? Yeah, it's very good.
Listen to it. It'll probably be in here at some point. I don't know if I'll be able to.
Yeah. Cut it in.
I'll have to find the perfect spot.
Then we turn the page, and we cut. Two months later, and there is just some yelling and some screaming and a whole bunch of servants hanging outside of a door. And they're like, the master said to leave Rasputin to his wife's care. But what are we supposed to. What's going on in there? Or do we need to. Do we need to go in there? Do we need to step in?
[00:26:28] Speaker A: Her husband's out there, too.
[00:26:29] Speaker B: And it's like, he says, Rasputin's methods are extreme, but he is Ryza's last hope.
And then it goes quiet, and then he's like, rasputin, sir, tell me, have you helped my wife's hysteria?
Rasputin.
Rasputinator.
Violate. Violating.
I'm trying to portmanteau Violator and Rasputin, and it's not working very well.
[00:26:53] Speaker A: Don't do it.
[00:26:55] Speaker B: Rasputin opens and he says, your rice is indeed satisfied.
Oh.
[00:27:03] Speaker A: And the violator says, fornication. Another gift wasted on human chattel. This body is so very good at it.
[00:27:09] Speaker B: And, Johnny, we have to come to a full stop here.
[00:27:12] Speaker A: Why?
[00:27:14] Speaker B: Could this be where Violator's daughter comes from?
[00:27:17] Speaker A: Could be.
[00:27:18] Speaker B: Good old Dakota.
[00:27:19] Speaker A: Oh, my God, Dakota's Russian.
[00:27:22] Speaker B: That would be interesting.
[00:27:24] Speaker A: I forget. That's Violator's daughter.
She's Palpatine having a daughter.
[00:27:28] Speaker B: She hasn't been in. She hasn't been in an issue in a very long time, and I missed that big hat.
[00:27:33] Speaker A: Where's that hat? Where's that dinosaur?
[00:27:34] Speaker B: Yeah, the. That ancient. Ancient library of nothing but dinosaurs.
And then Rasputin's like, yep, yep, yep. Okay, I'm good. I'm gonna go have fun.
And then the servants go in to check on Ryza, and they're like, madam, can we bring you anything?
She says, yes, bring back her sputum. You bring back her sputum.
And the. The main server is just like, yikes, yikes, yikesy. That is. That is a satisfied face, though, Johnny. Damn.
[00:28:05] Speaker A: Yeah, she looked like she had a good time.
[00:28:08] Speaker B: The husband just keeps following Rasputin out, and he's like, hey, wait, how much. How much do I got to pay you? So you could just take Care of my wife full time like this.
And. And Rasputin's just like, nah, I'm needed elsewhere.
[00:28:21] Speaker A: I gotta help other people.
[00:28:22] Speaker B: There are so many, so very many that need curing.
And then he's like, and also I need to find some booze. So he starts walking to a pub.
[00:28:32] Speaker A: And he senses somebody in the shadows.
[00:28:34] Speaker B: He's like, come out of the shadows and face me. And it is the Russian army.
[00:28:40] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:28:41] Speaker B: And he's like, hey, hey.
You guys all ready to die? Basically.
[00:28:46] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:28:46] Speaker B: It's a nice, nice little two page spread of them here. There's 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. Nine of these guys against one Rasputin, who will win.
[00:28:56] Speaker A: They're like, we will guarantee your safety if you surrender.
[00:28:59] Speaker B: And he's like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna make you the same offer.
And then they attack him. And, well, he shows them no mercy, Johnny. He guarantees no safety.
[00:29:10] Speaker A: Do you remember the safety not guaranteed, like meme or like the thing from back in the day?
So there's a. Supposedly there's a classified ad from like the 80s or 90s that says, I need someone to go back in time with. Only done this once before.
[00:29:23] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:29:23] Speaker A: Not guaranteed.
[00:29:24] Speaker B: I. I do know that one. Yes.
[00:29:26] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. That's what I think of when I hear safety not guaranteed.
[00:29:30] Speaker B: That's funny though.
[00:29:32] Speaker A: It tells a whole story. Yeah, I need someone to go back in time with me. I've only done this once before.
Safety not guaranteed.
[00:29:39] Speaker B: Yeah. Is that a better. Is that a better classified short story than for sale baby shoes? Never worn?
[00:29:45] Speaker A: I think it's better.
[00:29:46] Speaker B: It's more evocative because everybody automatically goes to, oh, the baby died. But no, maybe it was just a baby with fat feet or little bitty tiny feet and it never. Yeah, maybe babies grow really quickly. Baby shoes are kind of fucking pointless. Just wear socks. Just put socks on.
[00:30:02] Speaker A: Maybe they bought the shoes and forgot about them in a drawer.
[00:30:06] Speaker B: We need more context for that one, Johnny.
[00:30:09] Speaker A: Safety not guaranteed.
[00:30:10] Speaker B: Safety not guaranteed.
[00:30:11] Speaker A: So then Rasputin just start. Or the violator slash. Rasputin just starts.
Knife and dudes.
[00:30:17] Speaker B: Yeah, he knife sims and stabs them and slashes them and fishes them with knives and decapitates a couple of them all at once.
[00:30:26] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:30:27] Speaker B: And then like Superman jumps onto the second floor balcony to stab a guy in the throat.
[00:30:34] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:30:35] Speaker B: And then punch another one until his teeth fall out of his mouth.
[00:30:39] Speaker A: All of his teeth fly out.
[00:30:40] Speaker B: And then he crawls up to get another Guy on the roof and he gives him the bowling ball treatment.
[00:30:45] Speaker A: Yeah. He's pokes his two fingers in his eyes and puts his thumb in his mouth and rips him off the fucking roof.
[00:30:51] Speaker B: Yeah.
And then he. He does some fucking John Wick, you know?
Yeah.
[00:30:58] Speaker A: Pretty cool.
[00:30:58] Speaker B: Then when he's done with all those guys, Czar Nicholas, like, approaches him out of the shadows and he's like, huh, cool. Awesome. We're alone. I need help with my son. Do you do that?
Then we get smash cut to a sick baby. Very sick baby, with.
We know this prince had hemophilia. Very sick.
[00:31:24] Speaker A: Is that what happened?
[00:31:25] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:31:26] Speaker A: And Rasputin supposedly saved him.
[00:31:28] Speaker B: Yeah. Rasputin was like the only person who realized that he just couldn't stop bleeding and so was like, hey, maybe don't do anything that accidentally makes you bleed.
There are stories of. Apparently there was one time where the little prince. I forget what his name was.
It might actually been Nicholas.
Like, went sledding and it is Nicholas. Yeah, I think. Yeah, I think so. Went sledding and fell off and just like was fucking internally bleeding. And somehow Rasputin got it to stop.
But. But yeah, that was. That was his job. That was his job.
[00:32:07] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:32:08] Speaker B: Was making sure this little prince didn't die. And he became a trusted advisor for it.
What was that, Johnny?
[00:32:15] Speaker A: He's the mad monk baby.
[00:32:16] Speaker B: Oh, oh, I thought you said he was the prince of Bonk. And I was like, oh, yeah, that too. I mean, he definitely. He definitely slept with everybody in the court's wives.
[00:32:25] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:32:27] Speaker B: So yeah, we get the terrible scene with the midwives and the baby and the baby's mom.
And then the Tsar runs in and he's like, hey, I got this guy here. He's gonna help. This is Rasputin. And Rasputin's just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, I know what I can do. And he feeds baby Nicholas.
[00:32:47] Speaker A: He's feeding some demon blood.
[00:32:48] Speaker B: Demon blood. And he's like, look at this little. Look at this little baby boy. He's all fine now. You see? It's good.
Mama, Mama.
Hehe. The Tsar says, how can I ever prepay you? And like, the violator thinks in his head, the bill will be steep indeed.
[00:33:06] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:33:07] Speaker B: Oh boy, Johnny, he's right back at it.
[00:33:10] Speaker A: The old parents have more orgies.
[00:33:12] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:33:12] Speaker A: The days that follow were filled with carnal pleasures to no end. He's just having an orgy and he's feeding little. Little baby. A little toddler or like young adult Nicholas. Like demon blood.
[00:33:22] Speaker B: Yeah. And Then on his off days, he just violators out and runs around and eats a bear in the woods.
[00:33:28] Speaker A: Just eats a bear?
[00:33:29] Speaker B: Just eats a bear. He's enjoying the local cuisine.
[00:33:32] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:33:34] Speaker B: And then we see Rasputin and the Tsar walking through the woods.
And in the background, the Tsar's advisors are all like that Rasputin. I don't like what he's doing. He's got the ear of the Tsar.
He's got his own things that he's trying to do.
We don't like them. And so then we get a nice little panel of all the.
The Tsar's advisors, like, prepping how they're going to kill him. And with the canonical, Rasputin was poisoned, shot, stabbed, and ultimately drowned in a river.
[00:34:08] Speaker A: The violators like watching.
[00:34:10] Speaker B: Yeah, there's something with red eyes watching in every. And we got one guy pouring some. Some powder into a bottle, another guy sharpening his knife, one guy praying with a pistol.
[00:34:20] Speaker A: Hell yeah.
[00:34:21] Speaker B: Yep, yep, yep.
[00:34:22] Speaker A: And Violator's just there in his Rasputin skin, looking at himself in the mirror.
[00:34:26] Speaker B: And he sees himself as Violator in the mirror. It's pretty cool.
[00:34:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:34:30] Speaker B: He's taken stuck, and he's like. Well, basically he's like, you know, I've really loved being this Rasputin. Time's probably coming to an end.
It was a good time.
So the.
There's a knock on the door and the servant comes in bringing him an invitation to a party held by the advisors.
And this servant gets an eyeful of some Rasputin dong Johnny. And he's like.
[00:34:58] Speaker A: He goes, good God, it that. There's a typo in it too, which is funny.
[00:35:03] Speaker B: It that real?
[00:35:04] Speaker A: It that real?
It that real? Yeah. Evidently Rasputin's got a giant dong.
[00:35:11] Speaker B: Yeah.
Oh, man. And then so Rasputin puts on his clothes and the servant asks if he can be of any further servants. And Rasputin gives him a little. A little naughty tail flick. And I was like, we could have had an enjoyable time servicing each other.
[00:35:28] Speaker A: The servants, demon tongue.
[00:35:30] Speaker B: The servants at this. This palace are all just like.
Like all the time.
Rasputin enters the drawing room where all the advisors and Nicholas and the Tsar and the Tsarina are all having tea.
And one of the advisors offers Rasputin some tea and it's poisoned. He just drinks it away, puts it right in.
[00:35:55] Speaker A: It smells like arsenic.
[00:35:56] Speaker B: And then he's like, oh, oh, call an ambulance. But not for me.
[00:36:03] Speaker A: For you.
[00:36:06] Speaker B: And then the advisor starts stabbing him. And so Rasputin fights back and the Tsar. The Tsarina and Nicholas run away with the rest of the advisors.
Except for one of the advisors is like, hold on a second. I know a way I can take down this Rasputin. I'm gonna threaten this child. He's been taken care of.
[00:36:31] Speaker A: And he's like, what are you gonna do, dude? Yeah, you gonna murder innocent?
[00:36:35] Speaker B: You think you're Abraham? Oh, that's biblical. Nice.
That's a. That hurts. That hurts. Deep down in the book, Johnny. And this advisor's like, you've tainted this boy. We must free him. And so he slits his throat. He says, we must. The Trajan. The poison must be drained.
[00:36:52] Speaker A: There's a bunch of, like, tendrils come out of his slit throat.
[00:36:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
And there's the. The spooky.
The spooky word balloon of demon. Turns out it is Lucifer.
Lucifer who can be summoned through drawing the blood of a child, Johnny.
[00:37:12] Speaker A: Oh my God.
[00:37:13] Speaker B: Oh, man.
And Lucifer is like, haha, I've seen what you've been doing, Violator. Come back and work for me.
And Violator's like, motherfucker, how many times am I gonna tell you? No, no, go the away.
Yeah.
[00:37:29] Speaker A: He's like, you need child's blood to appear. Hahaha.
[00:37:32] Speaker B: And so Lucifer starts trying to cover violated Rasputin in these, like, thick webby tentacles that he's got. And he's just tearing them apart, like.
And then he grabs them like it's a. Like it's a tail. And swings Lucifer around and throws him right into the fire.
[00:37:52] Speaker A: Yeah. Much like the Violators exit in the Spawn movie.
[00:37:55] Speaker B: Interesting.
[00:37:56] Speaker A: I don't know. That shot just reminds me of the Spawn movie finale, which takes place in a living room.
[00:38:01] Speaker B: In a living room immortalized in that playset, right?
[00:38:05] Speaker A: Yeah.
It's just funny. It's so funny. That movie ends in a living room.
[00:38:09] Speaker B: It's so weird.
It's very weird.
[00:38:13] Speaker A: They go to Hell for like two minutes and it's literally incomprehensible.
[00:38:17] Speaker B: You know what? You know, it has a better hell, Johnny. Not. Not to be a butt about it or anything.
[00:38:24] Speaker A: What?
[00:38:25] Speaker B: Bill and Ted have, like, the hell that Spawn should have had just taken the old set from Bill and Ted and just been like, this is where we're doing Spawn Hell. And it was.
[00:38:34] Speaker A: Right.
[00:38:35] Speaker B: Perfect.
Bill and Ted are now on Pluto tv.
[00:38:41] Speaker A: Oh, nice.
[00:38:41] Speaker B: All three of them. All three of them.
[00:38:43] Speaker A: So, okay.
[00:38:44] Speaker B: And then it rolls right into Wayne's World.
[00:38:47] Speaker A: Oh, that sounds like a fun channel.
[00:38:49] Speaker B: Yeah, I think it's the cult classics.
[00:38:52] Speaker A: Okay.
Far out.
[00:38:55] Speaker B: Hell yeah.
Schwing and then after. After the Violator dispatches Lucifer, the Tsar and some of his men come back in.
And violator says, etu Czar Nicholas.
[00:39:12] Speaker A: And I'm out of here.
[00:39:14] Speaker B: Makes his escape out the window like every bad guy in a cartoon.
[00:39:19] Speaker A: Time to abandon sheep.
[00:39:25] Speaker B: And so he's running away, and they're shooting at him. And they're shooting at him. And he just jumps into the river and he's like, well, I guess I gotta get rid of this body now. But the good thing is there's always more humans to steal skins from.
[00:39:40] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:39:41] Speaker B: And so hours later, the.
The Russian guards are like, dragging the river and they find the Rasputin skin suit.
[00:39:52] Speaker A: And they're like, what the hell?
[00:39:53] Speaker B: Yeah.
And Tsar Nicholas is like, do not.
Do not say a goddamn word.
None of ya's. Keep your mouth shut. Zip it.
And then we see the Tsar turning back around to talk to the assembled peasants around. Around him and making a speech. And then we see that the Violator has taken the skin of an old woman and is hanging around in the crowd.
And it's just like.
That's a. It's a nice. That's a nice speech you're giving there. Be a shame if somebody were to proletariat.
Whoa, whoa. Because we all know what happens next.
[00:40:34] Speaker A: What happens next, David, for those who.
[00:40:36] Speaker B: Don'T know, was the October Revolution, right?
[00:40:39] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:40:39] Speaker B: Is that the one that. It is.
They overthrow. Yeah. The proletariat over overthrow the Tsar.
And it's where we get the story of the whole royal family being led away and shot. And that maybe Anastasia escaped and she's still alive. Anastasius alive.
Fucking love Bartok. That's a good movie. If any of you listening to this haven't seen the 1997 Don Bluth classic, Anastasia, you got. You got to get on it.
[00:41:09] Speaker A: She's hot.
[00:41:12] Speaker B: And all of the. All of the men look exactly like all of the other men in every Don Bluth movie ever.
Yep. Actually, no. I guess he had two. He had one young and good looking and one old and fat.
[00:41:24] Speaker A: Yeah, those are like two styles.
[00:41:26] Speaker B: So it's got the young and good looking and the old and fat. It looks. It looks like Papa Mouskovitz.
[00:41:32] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:41:34] Speaker B: Oh, boy. And then we get Spawn skull to end the issue.
[00:41:36] Speaker A: Spawn skull to end the issue.
[00:41:38] Speaker B: And a big beefy boy Johnny, but man moves so tight, you could bounce a quarter off this thing.
And then we get.
[00:41:48] Speaker A: We get the inks.
[00:41:48] Speaker B: The inks. And we start off with the.
The schwing. The schwing swing.
[00:41:54] Speaker A: The orgy.
[00:41:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
There's a nice. There's the nice inks of the nine soldiers all aimed down at Rasputin.
Very nice. Then we get the one of.
Of the guy getting. The guy getting bowling ball. That's a good one to have chosen. Oh, man.
[00:42:11] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:42:12] Speaker B: Then. Yeah. The little sick baby in the crib.
And then we get advertisement for the new generation. New stories, new you, Sam and Twitch Case files. Rat City Deadly Tales of the gunslinger and Knights versus Samurai.
[00:42:27] Speaker A: And we get the Image Classics AD Hell yeah.
[00:42:30] Speaker B: And then that's.
That's the end of the book, Jonah. That's Violator Origins number four.
[00:42:37] Speaker A: Indeed it is. Wow.
[00:42:38] Speaker B: Damn.
[00:42:40] Speaker A: We got through that fast.
[00:42:41] Speaker B: Took like no time. We could have done two of these.
Yeah, we'll have to remember that for next time.
[00:42:47] Speaker A: Sure.
Next was like super wordy and like takes like an hour.
[00:42:52] Speaker B: Then we've already committed to do two of them. By then it's like it's a four hour episode.
[00:42:57] Speaker A: Why have we done this to ourselves?
[00:42:59] Speaker B: I'm. I'm honestly surprised we haven't settled on having four hour episodes. It would. It would be so easy for us.
[00:43:05] Speaker A: To do the recording time and the editing times just would be rough.
[00:43:10] Speaker B: I'm. The recording time would be easier than the editing time. The editing time would be bad.
[00:43:16] Speaker A: Be brutal.
[00:43:17] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:43:18] Speaker A: Brutal.
[00:43:19] Speaker B: It would be.
[00:43:20] Speaker A: You just have to start releasing our raw audio. Like Joe Rogan.
[00:43:23] Speaker B: Just. Just do it live.
[00:43:25] Speaker A: Just do it live. Just live stream it. Don't even release it.
[00:43:29] Speaker B: We could. We could. We could do that.
[00:43:31] Speaker A: I don't want to.
[00:43:32] Speaker B: A lot of people do.
[00:43:33] Speaker A: The life of a live streamer is hard.
[00:43:36] Speaker B: One of the ones, there's a great British baking show recap podcast that I listen to and they literally record it. They finish recording it like five minutes before they upload it.
They basically just make sure that the. The beginning of the track plays and the end of the track plays. And they're like, it's good.
[00:43:56] Speaker A: Throw it on up there.
[00:43:58] Speaker B: Oh, man. I wish you.
[00:44:00] Speaker A: Right.
[00:44:01] Speaker B: I wish I could keep up. I don't have the radio training or the pattern training that you have, Johnny. And so there's always just like.
[00:44:10] Speaker A: I do that a lot too.
[00:44:11] Speaker B: Empty space where David doesn't know what's going on.
[00:44:14] Speaker A: Yeah, me too. That's why we edit.
[00:44:17] Speaker B: Yeah, edit it. As Sandra Cisneros said when I went to see her live, she said that you need an editor.
No matter what, you need an editor. It's like cutting your own hair. You still need somebody to help with the back. You gotta.
[00:44:35] Speaker A: I 100,000% agree.
[00:44:37] Speaker B: Yeah. Also, she was fucking awesome. The only problem is that I have my. My turquoise sunglasses that I was wearing. And I had a new turquoise fanny pack that I. I brought with me from my bag. And she was also wearing turquoise. So one of us had to go home and change. And it wasn't to going, oh, she. She also didn't change. So we were just two turquoise people staring at each other.
[00:45:02] Speaker A: That's okay.
[00:45:03] Speaker B: The older I get, the more I appreciate turquoise. I get it now, Johnny.
That shit's good color.
[00:45:09] Speaker A: It's a good color.
[00:45:10] Speaker B: I want to be one of those old men who's retired to like Santa Fe or some shit. Just turquoise everywhere. This is my turquoise spawn.
[00:45:17] Speaker A: It's got turquoise spawn. He's coming out.
I got a McFarlane toy. I got my Lilith action figure in the mail.
[00:45:25] Speaker B: A little. A little Lilith goes a dab will do you.
[00:45:29] Speaker A: That's a big Lilith.
[00:45:30] Speaker B: A big Lilith. Nice.
[00:45:32] Speaker A: We'll. We'll open her on the pod once I get moved.
[00:45:35] Speaker B: Very nice.
[00:45:35] Speaker A: I don't want to open her before the move.
[00:45:37] Speaker B: Oh, yes. Yeah. Because then you'll have to just like keep the box and put it all.
[00:45:41] Speaker A: Back in the box. Yeah, you don't want to do all that.
[00:45:43] Speaker B: And then you'll lose one of the hands and it'll be like she has different faces. Oh, nice. She's like the clown with the tearaway face, huh?
[00:45:51] Speaker A: Here in a flash. And Gone with no Trace.
[00:45:53] Speaker B: Yeah. It's almost. It's almost time to watch that movie too many times.
[00:45:58] Speaker A: Nightmare Before Christmas. It's almost time.
[00:46:00] Speaker B: I mean, technically you can watch it all year because it's got all the. All the holidays.
[00:46:04] Speaker A: All the holidays in it, Bunny.
[00:46:09] Speaker B: St. Patrick's Day, Valentine's Day, Halloween Day, Christmas, President's Day.
I forget. I forget what all else is in the.
I think it's Easter, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Thanksgiving and Halloween. And however many trees there are.
[00:46:28] Speaker A: I think that's about it. Yeah.
[00:46:29] Speaker B: Yeah.
Yeah.
[00:46:30] Speaker A: I don't know.
[00:46:31] Speaker B: It's good.
It's good. Just like these dogs, Johnny. I got a house full of good dogs. I rate them good dogs.
I think. I think that means we gotta rate this puppy, Johnny, that we just read.
[00:46:42] Speaker A: It's time to rate the puppy.
So this is Violator number four of six. Violator Origins number four of six. Called Favorite Son.
And it's a fun little story where the violator. You find out the violator was Rasputin.
[00:46:58] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:47:00] Speaker A: I mean, Andreko's killing It. These. These have been really cool little romps throughout history with the Violator. And it's just clever how he works them into it every time.
[00:47:08] Speaker B: Yeah. It's just like the world's worst beings. We're all just this one guy.
[00:47:13] Speaker A: And the bottle Corsi art is fantastic.
[00:47:16] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. It is so good.
[00:47:17] Speaker A: We didn't really talk about it, but it just tells the story so well. And it's so detailed and just, like, has weight to. It feels very grounded, very. I don't know. I really enjoyed it.
[00:47:28] Speaker B: Yeah, it's. It's real. It's real gross. But also. Yeah. Like, you can.
It's not overblown in any real proportions, so.
[00:47:37] Speaker A: No, it's pretty. Yeah.
And the colors are great. It really sells, like, the.
They're pretty muted to go along with, like, the time period.
[00:47:46] Speaker B: Yeah. And also, you know, I imagine Russia in the winter without a lot of electricity. Is very dark.
[00:47:52] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:47:53] Speaker B: For a lot of time. Very dark and very gray.
[00:47:56] Speaker A: Yeah. This is a fun. This is one of the. Another fun Violator story. It's not my favorite, but it's good.
It's interesting to see Spawn deal with sex.
[00:48:06] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess. Yeah.
[00:48:07] Speaker A: Does it happen too often?
[00:48:09] Speaker B: No, it's done in a real good way that it doesn't really draw attention to itself much more than the fact that obviously naked people. Obviously naked people. And obviously Rasputin was a bit of a cad in that regard. But it's not like this is a big, giant dong. Yeah. It's not like they. They then refer to their sexing while they're sexing and then talk about it afterwards like the Todd father would have done if he had written it. It would have been like. Did you see that sex we just had? It was real good. Wasn't.
[00:48:41] Speaker A: Was real good.
No, I like. It's fun. Fun short story. I'm going to give it four out of five giant dongs.
[00:48:53] Speaker B: That's. That's the perfect metric, Johnny, isn't it?
Yes, I. I agree. It's. It's a fun story. It's a fun entrance into this fun series. I like it a lot. I.
I am gonna give it four and a half Molotov cocktails. Right to the altar.
[00:49:13] Speaker A: Right to the Molotov cocktail. The altar, baby.
[00:49:15] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess. I. Yeah, no. Right to the altar. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna change what that was. Molotov cocktail.
[00:49:22] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:49:22] Speaker B: Right to the altar.
Yeah. That's real fun.
[00:49:25] Speaker A: Now we have to talk for another hour, David, because you made me edit an hour and 50 minute episode last week. And you have to edit this one. It's not fair.
[00:49:32] Speaker B: Hey, but. But the brand.
[00:49:33] Speaker A: Start talking.
[00:49:34] Speaker B: This. This. This is my equivalent of the brand one. We can be super long next week with two episodes.
[00:49:38] Speaker A: All right, all right, all right.
[00:49:40] Speaker B: You want to do a 2 issuer next week? Week. And then we can talk about it for three hours?
[00:49:44] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:49:44] Speaker B: All right. What. What two issues you want to talk about for three hours next week?
[00:49:48] Speaker A: I want to do two of my favorites. I want to do King Spawn and Scorch.
[00:49:52] Speaker B: Awesome.
[00:49:53] Speaker A: And I don't remember what numbers they are.
[00:49:55] Speaker B: That would be king spawn 46 and scorched 42.
[00:49:59] Speaker A: Sweet.
[00:49:59] Speaker B: That's going to be a good one. We're going to have. We're going to have a lot. We're going to have a lot to talk about that. No worries, Johnny.
[00:50:03] Speaker A: You will be a nice long one for you. Yeah, you're just going to.
[00:50:07] Speaker B: You're just going to be sitting there being like, so glad David got to do this this week.
[00:50:11] Speaker A: Yep. I'm just going to be pontificating.
What should they do in between now and next week to keep the Spawn love rolling?
[00:50:19] Speaker B: Well, Johnny, we should probably send them to visit some of our friends. Not our Rasputin friends. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But our Instagram friends are not perverts, but Spawnverts.
[00:50:33] Speaker A: Yes. Not a pervert like Rasputin, but a sponvert like us.
[00:50:36] Speaker B: Oh. Technically, you could probably make Rasputin into a Spawn vert if his soul is in hell and you recruit him to the army.
[00:50:44] Speaker A: That's true.
[00:50:46] Speaker B: He could wear the K7 Letha.
Yes, but no, no. We are specifically talking about real Spawnverts in the real world.
And we've got one friend that we'd like you to follow. And it's C underscore gray with an A underscore collect.
And they got. They got action figures. They got Spawn action figures, Johnny.
[00:51:08] Speaker A: They got spawn figures.
[00:51:09] Speaker B: They. They got figures.
That is what they got.
And they're good figures.
They got that nice. That A nice little violator that they custom repainted.
[00:51:22] Speaker A: Pretty cool.
[00:51:23] Speaker B: Pretty cool. Pretty cool. They got Commander.
[00:51:25] Speaker A: We love action figures.
[00:51:27] Speaker B: Yeah, action figures are fun.
More action figures. So, yeah, give them a follow. CGrayCollect.
[00:51:34] Speaker A: Absolutely. While you're over there, make sure to give us a follow. We are at regarding Spawn Pod on Instagram.
[00:51:40] Speaker B: Yes, indeed.
[00:51:41] Speaker A: You can also reach us by gmail@. Regarding spawnpod.gmail.com.
[00:51:46] Speaker B: Yes, indeed.
[00:51:47] Speaker A: Every week I like to ask a question to Spur conversation.
[00:51:51] Speaker B: Yes, you do.
[00:51:53] Speaker A: This week, I would say. So this is the Violator taking up a historical figure.
What other historical figures would it be fun to see the Violator to find out that the Violator was.
[00:52:06] Speaker B: David Duke?
[00:52:08] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a good answer.
[00:52:09] Speaker B: That would be a pretty good one.
[00:52:11] Speaker A: David Duke.
[00:52:12] Speaker B: Any of those guys fucking Mussolini.
I can't see the Violator really giving a shit about the trains, though.
[00:52:21] Speaker A: So he'd be like a televangelist preacher.
[00:52:24] Speaker B: Oh, he could totally be a Pat Robertson.
[00:52:26] Speaker A: Pat Robertson.
[00:52:28] Speaker B: Or he could be, like, one of the founders of Heaven's Gate.
[00:52:34] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:52:34] Speaker B: Yeah, I could see him. That would be a good one.
[00:52:36] Speaker A: Who's the. Who's the guy?
Jim Baker. The guy who went to jail.
[00:52:40] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:52:41] Speaker A: That has all. He sells all the doomsday buckets now.
[00:52:45] Speaker B: Doomsday buckets. He might be a. He might be a pretty good Charles Mason.
Mm.
[00:52:50] Speaker A: Maybe we'll find out he was Charles Manson.
[00:52:52] Speaker B: Maybe we will. Well, I don't think the Violator would get caught dead in jail for that long. He would be. He would, like, turn into a worm, escape through the sewer or something.
[00:53:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:53:01] Speaker B: What a worm. Very interesting. That would be fun to see.
[00:53:04] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:53:05] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:53:06] Speaker A: Well, we got two more issues of Violator. We'll see what happens.
[00:53:08] Speaker B: Yeah, we will. We will see what happens. Got two good issues.
[00:53:12] Speaker A: Cool. Hit us up there.
[00:53:13] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:53:14] Speaker A: While you're talking to us from the Internet, make sure to follow Lonnie Bones wherever you get music. Lonnie Bones.
[00:53:20] Speaker B: Lonnie Bones with a Y, not an ie.
[00:53:22] Speaker A: Yep. He does our music.
[00:53:24] Speaker B: Yes, he does.
[00:53:25] Speaker A: And we thank him for it.
[00:53:26] Speaker B: Yes. Thank you very much, Lonnie. It's good shit. True good shit.
[00:53:30] Speaker A: And we did that. Order is usually. We'll say what we're doing next week.
[00:53:33] Speaker B: Yeah. Oh, boy.
We done messed the whole thing up, Johnny. We're gonna have to start again. That's where the Ex started over.
[00:53:39] Speaker A: I mean, it's so short. We could record another episode. That's fine.
Well, it's only 5. 45 in the morning right now.
[00:53:47] Speaker B: Took us 45 minutes to record 52 minutes.
Yep. Ah, we got. We got the. We got the Kickstart going.
[00:53:55] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:53:56] Speaker B: Very nice. Very nice. Well, I mean, at the risk of being a short issue episode, Johnny, I ain't got nothing to say, but may the scorch be with you.
[00:54:07] Speaker A: And also with you, David.
[00:54:09] Speaker B: Oh, I forgot to say, like. And subscribe and follow and all that. That good stuff.
[00:54:12] Speaker A: Yeah. Do all that stuff.
[00:54:14] Speaker B: That's what I should have done. Dang it. Well, too bad that I already did my sign off.
[00:54:19] Speaker A: Well, take it from the.
[00:54:34] Speaker B: Sam.
Oh, those Russians.
